Sex and the city of God. .

In the 1980s, while I was studying theology, I remember a discussion with my father about some new church document that reiterated what I viewed as an uncompromisingly harsh and rigid approach to questions involving sexual ethics. I don't remember now if it was about divorce, birth control, or homosexuality, but I remember using some of what I had learned in my ethics and New Testament classes to argue for a new, more pastoral approach. My father, who could be fairly liberal on some issues, surprised me by supporting the official church line. No, he didn't dispute that the newer theological approaches made more sense, but he kept arguing that the church needed to be firm in upholding the traditional ideals and principles because otherwise things would just fall apart completely and people would do whatever they felt like.

There is some truth to this argument, but in the end it doesn't persuade me. I was reminded of it recently when I read a quote in the Chicago Reader in which author Garry Wills recalled hearing "two priests, Joseph Fessio, S.J. and John McCloskey, say that if the church changes the teaching on contraception, it will cease to exist. Just think," Wills comments, "all the original and saving truths of the church--creation, incarnation, resurrection, the sacraments, last judgment, eternal life--are not worth a thing if condoms are allowed.... This seems a high price to pay."

The church's continuingly uncompromising approach on issues where a more nuanced thinking is called for leads to a larger loss of credibility--further exacerbated by the current sex-abuse crisis. That loss of credibility is particularly acute among younger Catholics, and it is sad because it leads too many people to write the church off precisely at a time when some of our church's and our faith's wisdom--including on sexual ethics--is desperately needed in the larger society.

This month's interviewee, Sister Fran Ferder, F.S.P.A. ("Let's talk about sex," pages 20-24), provides a valuable perspective. She argues both for a rediscovery of important treasures of our tradition--especially our incarnational focus--and for a rethinking of the central importance the church has placed on genital behavior.

Meanwhile, this month's cover story by Renee LaReau ("Elimidated," pages 14-19) takes an in-depth look at the dating habits of today's young adults and the limited and difficult conversation about that trend within the church. And in our Examined Life column (page 50), a gay priest shares his perspective both on his own journey of faith and struggle within the church and on the scapegoating of gay priests for the sex-abuse crisis.

With A Conversation Continued (pages 10-11), we expand this month's offering of letters to the editor to give readers the space to respond to the recent inquiry into U.S. CATHOLIC by the Vatican Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith.