Sad about new family.

My dad and new stepmom took me ice skating with them and my stepsister. I thought it would be fun, but it wasn't. My dad kept holding hands with my stepsister (she's 8 and a bad skater), and I felt totally left out. I even drank hot chocolate alone, and my stepmom came over and asked what was wrong. I just shrugged. Should I have told her?

Dear Sad About New Family, Your mixed feelings are understandable, so speak up to your dad and stepmom. Your dad is being a good stepfather, but he might not realize it makes you sad to see him hold another girl's hand. A heart-to-heart won't magically take the pain away, but it will help. And your stepmom is probably already guessing your thoughts. Say, "I'm happy to be part of your family, but I admit I sometimes feel left out." They might have comforting words for you. Also try, "Dad, I know you're busy, but it'd mean a lot if you and I went to breakfast Sunday, just us. I like your new family, but I miss you." E-mailing or calling him might also give you two a chance to talk without involving the extended fam.

Carol Weston's books include Girltalk: All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You and For Girls Only (HarperCollins) as well as The Diary of Melanie Martin and three other novels (Knopf). Her website is carolweston.com. You can also write Carol c/o Girls' Life, 4517 Harford Road, Baltimore, MD 21214. For a reply, include a stamped self-addressed envelope. Carol is sorry that she can't answer every question personally, but you can find her online at girlslife.com.