SUMMER WAS HOT, MOST SUMMER MOVIES ... NOT FROM `BOURNE' TO `THE VILLAGE,' IT'S ALL STARTING TO BLEND TOGETHER FOR OUR FILM CRITIC.Byline: Bob Strauss Film Critic Cynics Cynics (sĭn`ĭks) [Gr.,=doglike, probably from their manners and their meeting place, the Cynosarges, an academy for Athenian youths], ancient school of philosophy founded c.440 B.C. by Antisthenes, a disciple of Socrates. say that Hollywood just goes for the quick buck in the summer, that the studios only release instantly disposable movies made for teenagers with the attention spans of gnats. Well, as a former teenager who's often been accused of having a reptile-sized brain, I can confidently state that the summer '04 film crop sure wrecked that theory. It left me, for one, with a trove of movie memories that I'll never forget. And a lot of stuff I'll retain well into November, too. I know, for instance, that I'll always remember the moment, during one of ``The Bourne Bourne, town (1990 pop. 16,064), Barnstable co., SE Mass., crossed by Cape Cod Canal; settled 1627, inc. 1884. Bourne Bridge (1935), across the canal, made the town an entry point to Cape Cod and a resort and commercial center. Supremacy's'' extra-jittery chase scenes, when that girl sitting 10 rows in front of me lost her dinner. Then there was that warm, communal feeling - which can only be shared in a dark auditorium full of strangers - of hundreds laughing while millions died from severe climate change and rotten dialogue in ``The Day After Tomorrow.'' And what about those breakthroughs in computer animation? Why, the characters in ``Shrek 2'' looked almost exactly like the characters in ``Shrek''! And that all-digital monster mash, ``Van Helsing''? Not only were the flying vampires convincing, I actually thought that I was watching the real Kate Beckinsale through the whole thing (only the impossible hourglass hourglass, glass instrument for measuring time, usually consisting of two bulbs united by a narrow neck. One bulb is filled with fine sand that runs through the neck into the other bulb in an hour's time. figure and accent-of-no-human-origin gave the trick away). I love Paris (not Hilton) Let's see Let's See was a Canadian television series broadcast on CBC Television between September 6, 1952 to July 4, 1953. The segment, which had a running time of 15 minutes, was a puppet show with a character named Uncle Chichimus (voice of John Conway), which presented each , what else? Boy, ``Before Sunset'' sure was a great movie. Articulate dialogue, mature characters with realistic yearnings and disappointments, subtly masterful filming of Paris like we've never seen it before. It was the least-attended sequel of the summer. And make no mistake, this was the Summer of Sequels. Four of the season's top five ticket-sellers (``Shrek 2,'' ``Spider-Man 2,'' ``Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban'' ``DAT'' and ``Bourne'' lead the chart) were franchise entries. I know, summer of last year had more sequels, but they all sucked, so two relatively original movies - ``Finding Nemo'' and ``Pirates of the Caribbean'' - made the most money. Well, Hollywood certainly learned its lesson from that. No, it wasn't to come up with anything too original, Silly. It was to make sequels like the last one in the series, but with something extra superspecial - a big-eyed kitty cat, the same ending twice, nausea-inducing camerawork - to let people know that this year's higher ticket prices were well worth the extra cost. That said, I've got to acknowledge that the ``Spidey 2'' producers made the most extensive - and effective - change-up by turning their comic book comic book Bound collection of comic strips, usually in chronological sequence, typically telling a single story or a series of different stories. The first true comic books were marketed in 1933 as giveaway advertising premiums. actioner into a four-hanky soap opera soap opera Broadcast serial drama, characterized by a permanent cast of actors, a continuing story, tangled interpersonal situations, and a melodramatic or sentimental style. . It was a brilliant move to hire literary genius Nicholas Sparks Nicholas Sparks may refer to:
n. pl. su·per·he·roes A figure, especially in a comic strip or cartoon, endowed with superhuman powers and usually portrayed as fighting evil or crime. movie. When James Garner's Peter Parker Peter Parker may refer to:
Wait, is that right? I guess it's time It's Time was a successful political campaign run by the Australian Labor Party (ALP) under Gough Whitlam at the 1972 election in Australia. Campaigning on the perceived need for change after 23 years of conservative (Liberal Party of Australia) government, Labor put forward a to admit that maybe, just maybe, some of my fond memories of the summer's movies may not be exactly what happened. I can only attribute that to such a rich cinematic feast, it overloaded my senses and left me a bit like Frank Sinatra ... no, um, Denzel Washington Denzel Hayes Washington, Jr. (born December 28, 1954) is a two-time Academy Award and Golden Globe Award-winning American actor and director. He has garnered much critical acclaim for his portrayals of several real-life figures, such as Steve Biko, Malcolm X, Rubin "Hurricane" ... in that Cold War movie with the Chinese name that somehow morphed into something to do with the Middle East. War ... what is it good for? Which reminds me: Which candidate does Michael Moore want us to vote for in November? I'm still so busy trying to separate the truth from speculation in his ``Fahrenheit'' documentary, that part's totally slipped my mind. Before I forget, Moore's Ray Bradbury adaptation wasn't the only movie to prove that thoughtful social commentary and the multiplex from May through August aren't mutually exclusive, spin-free zones. M. Night Shyamalan's allegorical ``The Village Idiot'' said a lot about how Americans perceive a threatening world (although I did guess the surprise twist, that they were actually living in the middle of an alien-infested cornfield, about halfway through). And even though the ever- controversial Spike Lee's ``White Chicks Hate Me'' upset all 20 people who went to see it, you've got to admire the filmmaker's bold casting of two Wayans brothers as lesbian heiress sisters. Keep breaking those barriers, Spike! Then there was that ultra-serious - and super star-studded - examination of that most urgent of issues, robots replacing people. ``I, Fembot'' may have disappointed purist pur·ist n. One who practices or urges strict correctness, especially in the use of words. pu·ris  tic adj. fans of Isaac Asimov's classic women's lib thriller. But really, you had to be an android An open platform for cellphones from the Open Handset Alliance (OHA). Based on Linux, Android includes a library of Java classes for building mobile applications.Android and GPhone not to get excited by the sight of Will Smith and Nicole Kidman terminating terminators in the name of all humanity and gender equality, too. Movies didn't have to be about the way we live now to be smart, either. Rethinking some of the greatest myths in Western culture was a major summer motif, and, successful or not, some real imagination went into those efforts. I'm not sure that Brad Pitt, however fetching he may have looked in long blond curls and a skirt, quite pulled off the difficult task of embodying ``King Arthur's'' Guinevere. But Keira Knightley's blue-painted Amazon warrior sure convinced me she could take out that girly girl·y adj. Variant of girlie. Helen of ``Troy'' anywhere, anytime. Speaking of girl fights, I'm not afraid to admit that the horror franchise grudge match ``CVP'' (``Cinderella vs. Princess'') scared the willies wil·lies pl.n. Slang Feelings of uneasiness. Often used with the: The dark, dank cave gave me the willies. [Origin unknown. out of me. Oh, the mean relatives, the lame misunderstandings, the easily attained unattainable boys, the gratuitous pratfalls, the incessant hair-flipping. I had nightmares for a week - but I'm eagerly anticipating next summer's sure-to-be-scarier creature feature, ``AVM'' (``Ashley vs. Mary-Kate''). Was there a Vin Diesel movie this year? Don't think so. It's worse than he thought Hmm, either my memory condition is getting worse, or the summer movies are getting even better than I originally thought. Let's see, was headlining ``Garfield'' really a daring, cross-species acting stretch for Oscar winner Halle Berry, or just more exploitation of her feline charms? Did Ben Stiller play Harold and Will Ferrell Kumar, or vice versa VICE VERSA. On the contrary; on opposite sides. ? Hindsight being 20/20 (or closer to 180/180, in my case), would Tom Cruise with a funny accent have sold more tickets than Tom Hanks with gray hair? Vin Diesel. I seem to remember Vin Diesel. Guess I'll have to accept that maybe the summer films of 2004 won't stick with me into October. But you know what? That's what DVDs are for. For now, why worry about quality, or even accuracy, when there are so many indelible cinematic moments to savor over and over again in my head? Like ... Like ... Boy, that ``Before Sunrise'' sure was a great movie Bob Strauss, (818) 713-3670 bob.strauss(at)dailynews.com CAPTION(S): 2 photos Photo: (1 -- cover -- color) OUTTA HIS HEAD The whirl of summer films is driving critic Bob Strauss crazy (2) no caption (summer movie characters) Photo illustration by Jon Gerung |
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