STUPIDITY SPRINGS ETERNAL.

Byline: Glenn Whipp Film Critic

'TUCK EVERLASTING'' is a movie that's supposed to be about the ups and downs of an immortal family, but, given the superficial treatment, neither the benefits nor the drawbacks of living forever seem to interest the filmmakers much. Instead, ``Tuck'' focuses on another never-ending thing that you just can't kill (as much as you'd like to) - insipid teen romance.

The film's basic message - live life to the fullest, don't be afraid of death, be afraid of the unlived life - is repeated solemnly by Elisabeth Shue in voice-over narration that drips with Earnest Importance. The thing is, at every turn, ``Tuck'' sabotages the life lessons it means to teach. If these people are sucking the marrow out of life, the bone went dry a long time ago. Watching the movie, you can't lose that nagging thought and escape into the movie's simple, fablelike structure.

The Tucks are folksy people living in the woods of rural Maryland in the early 20th century. When a wayward 15-year-old girl, Winnie (Alexis Bledel from TV's ``Gilmore Girls''), comes upon the Tuck homestead and its mysterious spring (paging Ponce de Leon), the family captures her and holds her hostage, albeit with offerings of loving kindness and home-baked goods.

See, the Tucks have a secret, although you wouldn't know it since director Jay Russell (``My Dog Skip'') gives the whole thing away in the movie's first two minutes. Mom Tuck (Sissy Spacek), Dad Tuck (William Hurt) and the two brothers Tuck (Jonathan Jackson and Scott Bairstow) aren't what they seem, which isn't saying much since the movie never bothers to develop most of them as interesting characters in the first place.

The exception is 17-year-old Jesse Tuck (Jackson, best-known for his stint on ``General Hospital''), whose flowing hair and free spirit bewitches little Winnie. Soon they're jumping from waterfalls, dancing around campfires and exchanging somber pledges of everlasting love. The only thing that can come between them is a mysterious stranger (Ben Kingsley, making a little like Robert Mitchum in ``The Night of the Hunter'') wearing a yellow suit and harboring some evil motives.

``Tuck'' is based on a young-adult novel by Natalie Babbitt, and Russell is obviously courting the middle-school crowd by concentrating on the story's wet-behind-the-ears lovers. But that focus is as doomed as the romance, laden as it is with stilted dialogue and tentative acting. Russell knows how to beautifully create worlds, but here he's failed to give his fable an interesting focus, which leaves you pondering the questions his worlds present but fail to answer.

Like, why don't the Tucks do something better with all that time on their hands? Why would Jesse wait nearly 90 years to find true love and then remain chaste for nearly 90 more because he lost it? What happened to living life to its fullest? And why would a man who wants to remain hidden wear a yellow suit in a forest?

TUCK EVERLASTING - Two stars

(PG: some violence)

Starring: Alexis Bledel, Jonathan Jackson, William Hurt, Sissy Spacek, Ben Kingsley.

Director: Jay Russell.

Running time: 1 hr. 30 min.

Playing: Wide release.

In a nutshell: Feather-brained fable tries to say we should live life to its fullest but offers no evidence as to why that would be a good thing.

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Photo:

Alexis Bledel, left, and Amy Irving find Ben Kingsley an intrusive presence in ``Tuck Everlasting.''