SO, GOODBYE ALREADY HEY, KATHIE LEE, HON - HOW CAN WE MISS YOU IF YOU WON'T GO AWAY?

It's a loooooooong goodbye, but the end is finally near. It's ``Farewell to Kathie Lee Week'' - as the diva of morning talk is about to leave her partner Regis Philbin.

It seems we've been saying goodbye to the daytime host since she announced she would be giving up her chair on ``Live With Regis & Kathie Lee,'' which airs at 9 a.m. weekdays on KABC (Channel 7). But Friday really is Kathie Lee Gifford's last day.

In the meantime, you'll be hearing all those Frank and Cody stories one more time, providing more fodder for Howard Stern.

So who will fill her high heels?

There's no word on whether the ``Good Day L.A.'' weather lady and Valley resident Jillian Barberie is on the short list.

``I haven't heard anything,'' Barberie said. ``I know nothing. There's all kinds of speculation out there, but who knows? That's where I stand.''

Actually, says a Regis insider, there isn't even a short list.

``Nobody knows anything yet,'' said Hope Hartman, a spokeswoman for ``Live With Regis & Kathie Lee,'' which airs at 9 a.m. weekdays on KABC (Channel 7). ``There's no timetable on making a decision, either. After Kathie Lee leaves, we'll have guest hosts until we can figure it out. We'll simply try people out and see who might work best.''

As for Barberie's chances, Hartman said it was too early in the process to handicap anyone, adding that the sometimes-wacky weather girl, whose alter-ego is the zany Goat Girl, was one of the first people to try out with Reege back on June 15, ``and there haven't been that many people who've been in the chair.''

Fill-ins for Kathie Lee's high-backed hot seat have included Philbin's wife, Joy; East Coast broadcasters Kathleen Murphy and Mercedes Woods; and funny lady Caroline Rhea.

But don't expect the new hostess to get her name in lights. With the success of ``Who Wants to Be a Millionaire'' Regis claims the title, which will become ``Live With Regis.''

- Fred Shuster With a chick chick here, and a chick chick there ...

First came the fanciful fowl of ``Chicken Run.'' Then three chickens were awarded to one of the tribes on ``Survivor'' (alas, they were promptly eaten). Now comes the chicken coop on ``Big Brother'' (alas, even the hens have no privacy). And let's not forget Burger King's ``Save the chickens (eat a Whopper)'' campaign.

We cry fowl, but nevertheless, it seems that in pop culture, the chickens have finally come home to roost. So, we let our imaginations take wing with the first of a several-part homage to our fine feathered friends. Watch this space.

- Wire Services

THE CHICKEN HALL OF FAME

Chicken Little

Little Red Hen

Foghorn Leghorn

Super Chicken

The San Diego Chicken

Chicken of the Sea

Rooster Cogburn

No heads are better than . . .?

It's true what they say about running around like a chicken with your head cut off. On Sept. 10, 1945, in Fruita, Colo., Lloyd Olsen decapitated a young chicken for dinner, but the hearty fowl refused to die. Impressed, farmer Olsen fed him with a medicine dropper, and Mike lived for months, sans head, becoming quite famous. Today, there's an annual headless chicken festival in Fruita. Don't believe it? It's documented at www.miketheheadlesschicken.org.

You are getting very sleepy . . .

Lay the chicken on its stomach, then move your finger in a straight line away from its beak. ``This induces total sensory overload in the chicken's two-volt brain, putting him/her/it under for anywhere from 15 seconds to 30 minutes.'' -- From ``The Straight Dope'' by Cecil Adams

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