SHOPPED TILL THEY DROPPED MADE MY LIST, NO TIME TO WASTE CHECKING IT.

Byline: BRENT HOPKINS Staff Writer

GLENDALE -- By the time I grudgingly dragged myself out of bed at 5:50 a.m., Harvey Arteaga had been hauling princess gear around for hours.

The San Fernando man had time to slick his hair into a mighty pompadour before he tucked his wallet into his blue jeans and hit the stores long before sunrise. I rolled up to the Glendale Galleria unshaved and toting a shopping list at 7 a.m. The pandemonium had already begun.

``We were in line for an hour and a half outside, then another hour and a half once we got inside,'' Arteaga said, pushing a massive stack of pink-and-white packages through The Disney Store about 9 a.m. with his girlfriend, Arasely. ``Now, we gotta go to J.C. Penney, Best Buy, Victoria's Secret and Circuit City. We've still got a ways to go, and we already spent two hours at Toys `R' Us.

``It's the Christmas drive, man, trying to take care of everyone.''

Such was my task, as well. Eleven theoretical people, $500, four hours and a bit of leftover Thanksgiving energy to get me through the ordeal. It wasn't pretty, it wasn't artistic, but just like Mr. Arteaga, I lowered my shoulder and made it through.

Packed parking lot

The parking lot was already packed nearly to the roof by the time I pulled in, the sun barely breaking through the fog above Macy's. List in hand, I made my way through a hoppin' mall, settling on Brookstone as a good place to cross some of the gadget folks off the list.

There, I found Brooks Almy, a Glendale teacher firmly ensconced in a massage chair. Her Macy's bags draped across her legs, she laid back in blissful relaxation as I priced electronics for the family.

``You gotta know what you need,'' she said from her position of calm repose. ``This is not the time to idly wander. I'm like a flash -- in and out.''

She was already done, and I was just getting started. Not good. I selected a massage pillow for my dad, $24.99, and an iPod travel alarm clock suitable for a brother for $99. And, for that special someone who's a bit too hirsute, a nose- and ear-hair trimmer for $30. A clean nose for $30 -- now that's a deal.

A few doors down, I swung into the Lego store. No longer the simple blocks of my youth, these were high-tech things with motors and floating stuff and Star Wars logos. Can't go wrong for a young nephew, right?

I opted for a $21 motorized police boat, 20 percent off, and quizzed the manager, Elizabeth Vartanian, on whether she had any odd Black Friday stories to share.

``Just this morning, this lady comes in and says, `I want something that'll drive the parents crazy,''' she said. ``I said, `OK,' but I was still looking for something the child would like. She just walked in, asked me, paid and went out. Didn't look around at all.''

At this point, I was feeling excessively cocky and ducked into The Disney Store, where Harvey and Arasely were making the long, slow trudge toward the cash register. Had I actually been buying, rather than pricing, I would have been tempted to give up.

I'd like to think that I'm a committed journalist and seeker-of-truth and all, but I'm not waiting in a three-hour line. That's just insane.

But the one-day sale, especially lucrative until 10 a.m., proved a powerful motivator. It was mainly women who filled out the lines that snaked through the store, but there was often a sleepy dude, hands thrust into sweat-shirt pockets, there to push and pay.

Harvey, I'm glad to report, was an enthusiastic participant in the shopping.

Dodging around children and grandmothers alike, I found a stuffed Thumper for a young niece and Goofy for an old neighbor of mine, $20 for the two. Next, I eyed a $6.50 stuffed Stitch, thinking a dog would probably enjoy chewing on it, then finished off adding a $7 Captain Jack Sparrow action figure, 40percent off list price. Ol' Captain Jack would look just great on my co-worker Brad's desk, among his stuffed rabbi and bobbleheaded Jesus Christ and Steve Garvey.

`No going back'

Things were looking pretty good, two hours into the adventure, so I began to rethink my strategy. If I came in under budget, I wondered aloud to Mike Baker -- who had the unenviable task of wading into the crowds to photograph the whole scene -- should I go back and get more?

``I'm a firm believer that there's no going back,'' he said. ``It's just like the buffet. You pass that creamed corn, you can't go back and get some.''

That in mind, we made our way to Frederick's of Hollywood, a store that I'm really not all that familiar with. Shopping for an imaginary girlfriend, I enlisted the help of manager Kristin Holman. Despite the early hour, she remained bright-eyed and enthusiastic.

``This is very popular with the customers, the cami and boy shorts,'' she said, waving around some lacy frippery. ``We've got promotional panties, cotton thongs five for $20 that make great stocking stuffers. And here's a cami that's sexy and conservative.''

While those are not words I generally associate with one another, it seemed like it would be something that chicks would dig, so I added it to the list. One $48 satin chemise, red with a little rhinestone on the bust line, and I was out of there.

But, as Mike pointed out, is a camisole a thoughtful gift for a girlfriend or one for yourself? So we went into Romano's Jewelers and looked into something with a little more glitz. For $49, I put a 10-karat, white gold ring with 10 points of tiny diamonds on the list and figured that would make the red underthings seem thoughtful.

Penultimate on the list, but certainly not in thought, came Mom. Since we were already in the store, I had floor manager Erika Calhoun step over to the necklace case and show us a nice 10-karat mother-and-child pendant iced with five points of diamonds.

``With this, you say, `I love you,''' she said. ``You always want to remind her. She always reminds you, right? You can never say it enough.''

With one guy left and more than $50 to spare, I spied a gorgeous, angora Kangol cap for a mere $24.99 at a hat shop named Lids. Though several observers suggested it was ``ugly'' and ``stupid-looking'' (or perhaps they were talking about me, the early hour and giddiness had dulled my senses), I figured it would make a perfect gift for a crazy uncle.

All told, I would have spent $463.84 and three hours of my time. With the balance, I elected to treat myself to the biggest cup of coffee I could find before writing this story.

brent.hopkins(at)dailynews.com

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CAPTION(S):

3 photos

Photo:

(1 -- color) Daily News reporter Brent Hopkins enjoys a massaging pillow at Brookstone in the Glendale Galleria on Friday. He bought one for his dad and scored a few other gifts there.

(2 -- color) Carlos Mata sits by his sleeping girlfriend, Samantha Toscano, during a break from shopping at the Glendale Galleria on Friday. The L.A. couple started at 6 a.m. Nationally, Web shoppers faced heavy traffic. See story in Business, Page 1.

(3) Daily News reporter Brent Hopkins checks out a satin chemise at Frederick's of Hollywood in the Glendale Galleria on Friday.

Michael Owen Baker/Staff Photographer