SHAQ ONLY BELITTLING HIMSELF.Byline: STEVE DILBECK And now for his latest remarkable feat, watch as the amazing Shaquille O'Neal turns the biggest man in the NBA into its smallest. As only he could do it. From Superman to Super Dunderhead, faster than a speeding bullet. The Big Whatever just can't help himself. He cannot shut up. Apparently he is truly incapable of finding professional happiness. You would think the guy would be contented as a computer nerd computer nerd - computer geek at an electronics convention. Everything has seemingly gone his way. It's all right there, and somehow it's still not enough. He cannot move on. Can't be the bigger man. Shaq has to look across 2,500 miles to take continual cheap shots. Memo to Shaq: Let it go. It's over. History. Bask in your success. Silently reap what you have sown and shut that infantile mouth. Hold it, this just in: Shaq did not say a single derogatory thing today about Kobe Bryant, Jerry Buss, Mitch Kupchak, the city of Los Angeles, the Pacific Ocean or ``Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith.'' He must have the shakes. It's gone on all season, and it's tiring. It's one thing to be amusingly childlike and another to be simply childish. Now you can understand the Big Whatever being upset with Kobe for giving him up to Colorado detectives, telling officers Shaq had paid $1 million to women to keep them quiet after sexual encounters. Shaq denied the allegation, but the constant sniping at Kobe goes well beyond any animosity that simply stems from Colorado. Theirs was the most infamous great relationship in NBA history. Great in that it produced three championships and four NBA Finals appearances in five years. Not so great in that neither was mature enough to put aside their super egos and personal agendas to recognize they had something very special going. Shaq, still under contract for two years at $58.3 million, wanted a contract extension. And when he asked for it. The poor baby didn't get his way, or at least the amount he wanted. So Shaq demanded a trade last offseason and got it. The Lakers did not send him to the lowly Atlanta Hawks, but to a good team in a great city. He showed up, his shtick played fresh, the city fell at his feet and the Heat turned into world-beaters. All while the Lakers spiraled out of playoffs contention for the first time in 11 years. Shaq wins! He did not have to say a thing. The results were there for all to see. The high road called, and he couldn't take it. All season he sniped at Kobe, though seldom by name. Kobe, to his credit, did not return the verbal volleys. He took shots at Kupchak, despite the Lakers general manager apparently doing him this great favor by trading him to Miami. His team had the best record in the East. Are a co-favorite for the title. And still the Big Whatever won't let up. Admittedly, he was tweaked by Buss who said last week he would not have traded him if he'd known Shaq was going to lose 60 pounds. Shaq responded by saying Buss was not a real owner like Miami's Micky Arison and he spent too much time partying with women three times younger. Hey, Shaq was a blob the past few years. He did fail to keep in shape. He did put off toe surgery for months so he could enjoy his offseason and started the season on the injured list. Then this week he unloaded yet again on the Lakers in USA Today. He called L.A. ``fake'' and Miami a more real place. Called Buss ``that old man,'' team management ``cowards'' and Kobe ``arrogant,'' while barely being able to say his name. The Big Whatever said he became so frustrated with Kobe he was worried he might try to bust his head open, and who knew Tex Winter could still set such a mean screen? Shaq has crossed the line before with comments insensitive to Chinese, Jews and the Sacramento Kings (OK, that was funny). But he's so likable, so playful, so outrageous, he was always allowed to skate. Now he just seems petty. Buss is the owner who signed Shaq to a $123-million, seven-year deal. L.A. is the city that embraced him. Management, right or wrong, did have the courage to trade him. And Kobe may be arrogant, but that's pot-and-kettle time. Shaq must really miss Los Angeles and the Lakers. He can't stop talking about them. The Big Whatever is like the beautiful woman whose self-esteem becomes tied to comments on her beauty, the exterior belying insecurity and the need for more adulation. He comes off the ungrateful child. He won three championships here. Those should be ours and his memories. Not the way he can make himself so very small. |
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