SEX, ETC., Editorial Board discusses what works (and what doesn't) in sex ed.

What do teens think is the best way to teach students about sex?

The following teens, who are providing their insight, are on the 2002-2003 Editorial Board of SEX, ETC., the national newsletter and web site (www.sexetc.org) that is written by teens for teens about sex, pregnancy, condoms, birth control, sexually transmitted infections (STIs), and relationships.

SEX, ETC. is part of the National Teen-to-Teen Sexuality Education Project developed by the Network for Family Life Education at Rutgers, The State University of New Jersey.

LALITHA CHANDRASEKHER, 17

Don't teach abstinence-only! Teens are more driven to do what they're told not to do. If they are taught only to abstain from sex, they'll be left to wonder what it's like and will be more likely to indulge in sexual activity. Give teens the most comprehensive, honest, and accurate information on contraception, STIs, abortion, pregnancies, teen parenting, and sex regrets. Don't overemphasize that sex is a "bad" thing. Emphasize that sex is a weighty decision to make, involving many factors (some painful) and that teens have the option to abstain. Take away the mystery and tell them exactly what sex is. So, even if they choose to have sex, they are well informed and, hopefully, well protected.

ELIZABETH MARCHETTA, 17

The best way to teach teens to make the right choice for themselves--whether that means abstaining from sex or practicing safer sex--is to give them honest, accurate information. Being fully knowledgeable about the physical and emotional consequences of sex helps teens to make the decision that's right for them. Educating teens to practice safer sex is essential--even for those who decide to wait--because when they finally become sexually active, they will need to understand their bodies and how to protect themselves, and others.

KEHINDE TOGUN, 18

Safer sex and abstinence should be taught hand-in-hand. In the first two years of high school, students should be taught that the Number One way to prevent pregnancy and STDs is abstinence. However, they should also be taught that if they choose not to abstain they should be responsible, using protection. Teens need to be taught that having sex is nothing to be ashamed of, and neither is buying a condom. In fact, it is smart, safe, and responsible. It is a common misconception that all teens are having sex. The sex-ed class should stress that this is only a myth. Overall, teens need to be taught to love and respect themselves and their bodies, and not to do anything to violate that respect.

SCOTT DOYLE, 18

To teach only abstinence is to put students in a dangerous position because it tells them what to do rather than how to make informed, educated decisions on their own. At a certain age, students will need to make choices about sex. If the only thing they've been taught is abstinence, then they won't have the knowledge that's necessary should they decide to have sex. As a result, they will make poor decisions about birth control and protection against STDs. Teens need to learn how to use condoms and birth control. If they're denied this information, it doesn't mean they will abstain from sex. It simply means they won't be smart about their decisions.

SARAH OTNER, 18

The best way to delay sexual activity (and teach abstinence) is to increase teens' sense of self-worth. More importantly, students should understand the length of time they have to be sexually active. Just because they don't have sex in high school, it doesn't mean they won't in college or beyond. Scare tactics and statistics may work to delay activity in some, but to truly delay teen sex, educators must work from the inside out with teens to remove the need for attention. A comprehensive sex-ed program, covering all bases, is the best option. Students must learn about the infections that threaten in unsafe sex, and the overwhelming benefits of contraception. This covers the "if abstinence is not going to happen for you, here's what you do" area of sex ed. Educators must recognize that both parts are vital to a complete education.

JOLEEN RIVERA, 18

It is a natural teen instinct to defy authority figures. The more pressure teens are put under not to have sex, the more likely they will engage in it. Therefore, sex should be talked about openly. Teens should be taught the pros and cons of sex at their age. From this, they are free to make their own decisions. (Hopefully, they will realize that the cons outweigh the pros.) If a teen decides to have sex, he or she should use protection. Schools should make contraceptives available and stress their effectiveness in preventing pregnancy and STIs. This will insure teens' health and safety.

LORYN COZZI, 17

The best way to teach teens to abstain from sex is to teach about the consequences and responsibilities of sexual activity. Those considering sex may realize that the STIs, chance of pregnancy, and emotional burdens that come with sex may not be worth it. They may realize that their methods of birth control/STI protection aren't safe. If they learn not to have sex until they're truly ready--or how to have safer sex if they decide to have sex--it will stick with them better. Parents and teachers need to be more open and less afraid to answer questions.

KIRSTEN SCHMITT, 18

Knowledge is the best protection against bad decision-making. All the missing information about sex must be filled in. This means teaching teens about abstinence plus correct information on condoms and birth control. If we fill in the missing information about sex, teens will have much better ground to stand on when making a decision.

KEDAR MANKAD, 18

The catch phrases and slogans used by teachers preaching abstinence and safer sex seem fruitless. Teens are rebellious by nature, and if they're forced to believe something, they will reject it. The best way for teens to learn about abstinence is through each other and the solid facts, like statistics on teens affected by STIs. Teens may not listen to teachers, but they listen to statistics and peers. They should be taught through programs that involve speakers their age who've chosen abstinence. It enables them to see that they're not alone if they choose this.

LAUREEN DELANCE, 17

Teens should be taught to abstain through comprehensive sex ed, no matter if they're in public or private school. All aspects of sex should be taught. If certain information is left out, students are left out. There are many sexually active teens these days. They have to learn about protection and STIs if they decide to have sex again. Rather than a teacher saying, "just say no" to sex, the consequences of sex and methods of protection should be discussed.

MAHESHWARI MISTRY, 17

All teens have an underlying fear of something, whether it be rejection, the future, or failure. So, an effective way of teaching them to abstain from sex is by instilling a fear of the future. Don't scare the daylights out of them, but teach them about STIs, show them what pregnancy can do to a person mentally and physically teach them about the numbers of teens dying from AIDS, and show them that love isn't the same thing as lust. This proves to teens that sex is not just a playful activity

While some teens fear consequences, some just don't care when they're in the heat of passion. We need to teach them to be safer. Teach them how to use contraception effectively; how to get it, and what it protects against. Teach them about condoms. Some don't even know the difference between latex and polyurethane condoms.

EMILY CHALONER, 16

Teens do not want to be preached to about abstinence. Not only do we get tired of hearing it, but if abstinence is the only thing taught then the teens who want to be or are already sexually active won't be educated. Safer sex must be taught. We need to know where to get and how to use contraception. Without this information, contraception is useless, We need to be told that safer sex not only prevents pregnancy but also STIs. Students should be given all the information that they deserve.

ANDREA LEE, 15

Make abstinence a choice -- not a demand or the "only answer." This lets teens see that they do have a choice in what to do with their bodies. Many teens like the feeling of independence and being able to make their own decisions, so present abstinence as a good and healthy choice and not just what parents and teachers want teens to do. Give a balance of pros for abstinence and cons for having sex early This gives teens a look at what good can come out of delaying sex, instead of only filling their minds with STI statistics and pregnancy rates.

CHRISTINA CORBA, 18

In a perfect world, abstinence-only sex ed would work; it would easily convince teens to wait until marriage. But we don't live in a perfect world. The bottom line is that teens are going to do what they want sexually regardless of what adults tell them.

People should only make big decisions after they've weighed the positives and negatives. How can anyone make a good decision without all the facts? Explain to teens all the contraceptive methods and how to use each one.

Teens are young adults, and if they feel mature enough to engage in sexual activity, then they should be given the information they need to keep themselves safe. Adults aren't stopping teen sex by not giving teens information. Consequently teens are not abstaining from sex--they're having it in a more dangerous fashion, without the proper knowledge.

MEGAN ESTEVES, 17

The harsh reality is that teens will experiment with sex no matter what, so why would we render them helpless by denying them the skills they need to make mature and wise decisions? We claim that a person is not ready for sex until he or she has reached adulthood, but what is adulthood? Most would agree that it is defined by our ability to deal wisely with difficult decisions and accept the responsibilities of our actions. With this in mind, it is obvious that comprehensive sex education is a necessity When faced with a sexual decision, teens should be armed with the tools they need to make adult decisions and act responsibly Keeping teens in a state of perpetual childhood is not going to erase the influences of sexuality. If anything, it is going to enhance its appeal.