Rising from the ashes: the aftermath of being fired.

CAREER MANAGEMENT

Firing is a devastating event, even if recruiters call you fairly regulary about other possibilities. The rejection feels personal, and it takes some time to get over the initial shock. The support of a well-developed network of professional contracts, family, and friends soften the blow. After a short period of grieving, it is important to get busy and contact people in order to move to the next phase of your career. I recently interviewed a member of the College who was fired unexpectedly. The story provides valuable insights for others who may face this potentially destructive event. Because of the sensitive nature of the story, the physician executive asked for and received anonymity, and details of the story have been altered to further protect the physician's identity.

What position did you have at the time you were fired?

I was Chief Medical Officer of a large tertiary hospital in the Northwest. I had been there a little more than two years. The hospital had a high number of Medicare patients, and it was hit hard by DRGs, the first wave of managed care to hit hospitals. One of my roles was change agent to influence physician practice patterns. We turned around a lot of the cost problems by looking at physician behavior.

The CEO who hired me retired, and a new CEO was brought in. He pulled a group of senior managers together, and we went on a two-day retreat. The word was, "You are the group I'm keeping." During my entire tenure, the medical director whom I had been hired to replace never left the premises. The role that he had developed for himself never evolved, and there was no funding for it.

How did it happen?

I was informed that I had been terminated by letter, which the CEO's secretary brought to me about 4:00 one Friday afternoon. This was less than three weeks after the retreat where I was told I was part of the team. It was not too long after I had received a raise, all sorts of commendations, certain financial securities and parachutes as a reward for a job well done. I was on top of the world, and yet, within no more than 4-6 weeks, my world came tumbling down. The letter said, "We have one too many physician managers. You've done a good job, but you are the last in and the first out. We can't afford three and we need two."

I managed to leave the office with my head held high. I thought my world had collapsed. I came home that afternoon and my wife said, "What are you doing home so early?" Because I never came home at 4:00. 1 usually came home at 6:00 or 7:00. 1 sat down on the edge of the chair and I said, "I've lost my faith in humanity. I've lost my job, and I cried. I don't cry very often, but I cried. To my wife's credit, after a few minutes she picked me up and said, "Go clean up. We're going to go out, have dinner, and celebrate the move to the next stage of the rest of our lives."

I forced the CEO to write to the medical staff exactly what had happened. I didn't want to have to explain it to everybody. I knew it would get out, and I wanted the CEO to go up front and explain what happened and why. I also jumped all over him for the way he did it. He needed to have the guts to look me in the eye. I told him I respected the fact that he was paid to make hard decisions, that although I didn't agree with his decision, I respected his right to make that decision. It was just handed to me the wrong way.

What was the worst part of being fired?

The worst part was the abject shock. I knew there were some warning signs--the other fellow never left, a new CEO came in, the CEO and the previous medical director had been friends--and yet I felt fairly secure, mainly because of the rewards I had received, the validation at the retreat, the parachute that was given to me for a job well done. I was still blindsided, and the pain of that time and of the next few days and the humiliation of telling my wife and family was probably the most difficult thing I've ever gone through in my life.

As you look back at it, was there a good part to it for your life and for your future?

Yes. It forces you to take stock, to use this time to pause and rethink where you are in your career and where you want to be. It validates the fact that you can pick yourself up off the floor, and you can wipe the blood off your nose, and you can climb up and achieve things that you may not have gotten before through the support of friends and family and networking and just digging down deep into yourself I think the measure of a person is how they respond to adversity. As painful as it was, it tests you. I probably have a greater feeling of self-worth now that I've picked myself up. I had a family that stood by me, a network that stood by me. I had more opportunities than you can shake a stick at. I'm a whole lot smarter.

I couldn't say the "f" word for a while. I would explain the situation and not say the word. It is one of those words that sounds like what it is. I think that is called onomatopoeia. Fired is a harsh cutting word. Now I can tell people I was fired. I don't have to tell them I was terminated.

How long did it take to feel better?

I think it took 2 to 4 weeks. [We were talking on the phone and he called to his wife in another room and said, "How long did it take me before I was out of a funk?" She called back, "Four and closer to eight weeks."] For a while you just beat yourself up.

What helped you?

The first week, I called a friend and a professional career counselor whose business it was to counsel and advise people at a time like this. I kept a diary at his recommendation. I wouldn't have done it on my own. I still haven't looked at it. It's here. When we make explicit what was implicit, it has a different meaning. It's like when you are forced to write down your goals and put them on paper, it has a different meaning than if you just think them. The exercise of going through that had a bit of a healing effect, purging yourself of the demons. I recommend that you seek professional advice and don't be too proud to do that and think that you know everything about everything.

I made a business of resurrecting my career and moving forward. Each morning I got dressed, went into the office in my home, and went to work. I kept a calendar, I had hours and I had appointments. I just started turning over stones, and fortunately I had kept my resume with most of the physician executive head hunters. I called some key people in the college. I found another position in three months.

Are there things you wish you had or hadn't done?

I've thought about it a 100 million times. At times, I don't think so. I was proud of the job I did. At other times, I've thought I could have been more politically adroit. I could have spent more time with some of the key power players of the hospital.

Are there lessons you have learned?

One of the things I've learned is that we need to take responsibility for all that happens to us. Any time there's failure or something doesn't work out, you have to assume it wasn't all just circumstances. Perhaps there were some things you could have done better, some things you didn't do or politically you could have been more astute.

Sure there is a political piece to it. The guy in the background came back in and did my job. I was a change agent. I wasn't a caretaker medical director, I had not grown up in that hospital. I didn't have the long history.

Unfortunately, it has made me more skeptical. By nature I believe in humanity and I like to have faith in and trust other human beings. It's made me a little bit jaded, and I think that is probably wise from a business perspective. I don't like it from a humanitarian perspective, because I tend to believe in the good in people and they have to prove me wrong. I've become more cynical since then, but I've also come to realize that business is business and if possible try not even to personalize it because it wasn't personal.

Also, I learned: As long as you are working for somebody else, there is no absolute security. No matter what is said or written, there is no absolute security. Changes take place in organizations at lots of different levels all the time. When you work for someone, you are a commodity. A lot of times, when a new CEO comes in, he or she makes a lot of changes, right or wrong, good or bad.

Does anything else come to mind?

I've got great things to say about the ACPE, because, without the College, first of all, I probably never would have gotten some of those positions. I think one of the undervalued parts of the College is the network. Every time I have called anybody and asked for advice and counsel, there has just been an outpouring of help. I don't know if it is underutilized, but I didn't appreciate the power of the organization until I went through that, and I'll be forever grateful. That is one of the reasons I'm so involved and why I'm trying to give back, because I don't know what I would have done without an anchor. I guess I would have survived, but it sure made it a lot easier. We all need anchors in the storm. Word leaked out. People in the College called and said, "Have you considered this? Have you considered that?"

What advice would you give to others in the same situation

You have to prepare as if it going to happen. You have to have everything in place as if you could get fired tomorrow. Never, never, never assume that it can't or won't happen to you. If you chronicle the lives of most successful business people, many of them have had a similar experience somewhere along the way, whether it was in early, middle, or senior management.

Being fired is like being smacked with a whip. You go into your office one day and "blam," it happens and your whole world collapses. Is everything in place? Do you have a network? Do its members understand what you do? Is your resume current? Have you kept yourself in visible positions by writing or speaking or taking leadership roles in the organization? Preparation ahead of time is essential.

Also, take the high road. Don't point fingers. Don't blame what happened on anyone else. In fact you don't have to blame it on anyone. It's just that certain things happen. Accept your fate. I watched my favorite pro basketball team last night, and they just got shellacked. Some days you just get shellacked; you just keep your mouth shut and you move ahead. Many people get fired, but when you go blaming other people, you are hurting yourself. You're not going to hurt the organization. Sooner or later, it will come back and just kill you.

Barbara J. Linney, MA, is Director of Career Development for the American College of Physician Executives, Tampa, Fla., and a member of its faculty.