Rap daddy.

My dad and I went to the zoo, and it so happened my favorite radio station was broadcasting from there that day. As we got to the entrance, a DJ asked my dad his name. For some odd reason, my dad decided to rap, "Duane Shizzy in da house," on live radio and the speakers over the entire zoo.

I was messing around with my flip-flop at the movies, and it fell into the row in front of me. A little girl sitting there picked up my shoe and showed it to her mom, who took it to security. I don't know what security did with it, but I never saw it again. I had to leave with one shoe!

My music teacher was reviewing how we would dress for our school concert. She asked the boys what they were going to wear, and they said, "White Oxford shirts and jeans." Then she asked the girls what we were going to wear, and I quickly shouted out, "Nothing!" I meant nothing in particular, but the whole class cracked up.

Every year, my family does this thing called "Tavern Night" at a local museum. We dress up in 18th-century garb and serve food. The costumes are fun to wear since they're full skirts, corsets and low-cut bodices. Well, I was checking out this hot guy sitting with his family. I decided to be brave, went over to him and asked if he wanted more dessert. He nodded, so I leaned over to serve him some--and my boobs nearly popped out of my bodice! He said, "I didn't mean that sort of dessert." Ew!

I accidentally knocked over the salt shaker during lunch. I am superstitious and went to toss some salt over my shoulder. I picked up the shaker and, instead of tossing a little behind me, I threw the whole shaker and hit this guy in the eye! Now, he always asks me to pass the salt.

I like this guy, so I followed him to see where his locker is. I guess he sensed he was being followed, because he turned to his friend and said, "Hey, that girl who likes me is stalking me!" Everyone in the hall looked at me. Ugh.

My crush and I went to see a horror flick, and he leaned over and put his arm around me. Just as he was about to kiss me, a scary part of the movie made me jumpy. When he touched me, I screamed and hid in my jacket. He has not talked to me since.

My little brother was laughing in the bathroom, so my dad pushed the door open. My mouth fell open. My brother had pushed together five or six tampon applicators, which he found in the garbage can, and was waving them around like a baton. My dad said, "You'd better put those down--you don't know where they've been." Eek!

I was at the mall and saw my crush staring at me. I felt so excited that he had finally noticed me, He waved, and I waved back. He walked over, and I grabbed him and hugged him. He pushed me off and asked what I was doing. He walked away and went to greet his girlfriend, who was right behind me: I've since learned I should always look over my shoulder.