Printer Friendly
The Free Library
22,741,889 articles and books

Pardon me for breathing: seven types of apology.



"I'M SORRY. Excuse me. Please forgive me. I beg your pardon. I apologize. What do we mean when we say we're sorry? It would seem that we can mean anything from remedial expressions of regret to sarcastic intimations of blame.

In our analysis, we have demarcated seven types of apology. To further understand these seven types, we have employed five etymologies, which we can use as formulas for investigation.

We shall assume that these five etymologies (marked a through e, respectively, and arranged in descending order of frequency of use (1)), have a rough analogy, even though one cannot necessarily replace them with one another, due to restrictions of syntax, context, and usage.

Five Etymologies for Apology

(a) "Sorry" derives from sore; has a similarity in use to German 'es tut mir leid', and to French 'je suis fache de....'

(b) "Excuse" (ex-causa, structurally analogous to German 'ent-schuldigen,' to Russian 'iz-vinit' and to Spanish 'dis-culpar') directly speaks of the removal of accusation.

(c) & (d) "Forgive" (for-giefan), as well as the English/French "pardon" (perdonare) and the German 'vergeben,' indicate to give completely.

(e) "Apologize" (apo-logos, somewhat similar to Russian 'prostit') denotes speaking off, or a speech in defense.

We further explore these etymologies in the footnotes. (2)

For the purpose of analysis, we may regard these etymologies as formulas. Consider these recent news items. Following each item, we have put in parenthesis parenthesis: see punctuation.


The left parenthesis "(" and right parenthesis ")" are used to delineate one expression from another. For example, in the query list for size="34" and (color = "red" or color ="green")
 the letters indicating which of the five formulas/etymologies these apologies employ:
   "Russian President Vladimir Putin apologized for the captives'
   deaths [held by Chechen rebels in a Moscow theatre] in a
   television address saying: 'Please forgive us. The memory of the
   victims must unite all of us'" (10-27-02 CNN). (e, c)

   "Les excuses de Saddam Hussein au peuple koweitien: 'Nous demandons
   pardon a Dieu pour tout acte ayant souleve sa colere dans le passe
   ... et dans cet esprit, nous vous presentons egalement nos
   excuses'" (3) (12-7-02 Le Monde). (b, d, b)

   Cardinal Bernard Law, on his resignation from the Archdiocese of
   Boston: "To all those who have suffered from my shortcomings and
   mistakes, I both apologize and from them beg forgiveness"
   (12-14-02 CNN). (e, c)

   "Fighting for his political life, Republican Senate leader Trent
   Lott offered a public mea culpa for comments that appeared to
   endorse segregation: 'I apologize for opening old wounds and
   hurting many Americans who feel so deeply in this area.' ... He
   asked people to 'find it in their heart' to forgive him" (1214-02
   CNN). (e, c)


In these news items, the speakers use several different formulas inter-changeably, occasionally employing more than one for the sake of strengthening their statement (and perhaps in order to drive home its sincerity; see Moore, 2001 on such uses of tautologies). (4)

In spite of their highly varied sources, all of these expressions seem to convey the speaker's acknowledgment of some wrongdoing wrong·do·er  
n.
One who does wrong, especially morally or ethically.



wrongdo
, coupled with a request to extenuate extenuate
(iksten´ūāt´),
v to lessen; to mitigate.
 blame. And yet avowals of apology may greatly differ from one another with respect to the degree of regret involved. We have arranged the following in descending order on this "scale of compunction." (5, 6) We must keep in mind that recipients have no valid information about senders' intentions. Specifically, they do not know whether senders freely choose to apologize or feel coerced to do so, act out of sincerity or hypocritically hyp·o·crit·i·cal  
adj.
1. Characterized by hypocrisy: hypocritical praise.

2. Being a hypocrite: a hypocritical rogue.
 distort their apologetic statements. This scale has no objective basis; furthermore, nuances of intonation and other aspects of non-verbal communication will affect it.

Seven Types of Apology

1. I'm sorry for having stepped on your toe.

I know I've hurt you. Believe me that I didn't intend to. I wish I hadn't done it or that I could undo it. Given another chance I would be more careful. I regret having done it. (Formulas a, b, c, d, e)

This type of apology serves as the prototype for the expression of religious repentance. In none of the other types can we find the element of regret and a promise not to repeat the offense:
   O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee, and I detest
   all my sins because of Thy just punishments, but most of all because
   they offend Thee, my God, Who art all-good and deserving of all my
   love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to sin no more
   and to avoid the near occasions of sin. (Act of Contrition in the
   Catholic liturgy. There exist many forms of the Act of Contrition;
   the above standard form appears in such sources as the Baltimore
   Catechism). (7)


Even this seemingly most remorseful re·morse·ful  
adj.
Marked by or filled with remorse.



re·morseful·ly adv.
 expression carries no information about its sincerity. To clarify this point, consider that not only religions exact a request for forgiveness (by making such set formulas mandatory); identical mechanisms appear in such widely different frameworks as diplomatic relationships and family interactions. As an illustration of the former, consider a 2001 incident, when the Chinese government Ever since Republic of China founded in January 1st, 1912, China has had several regional and national governments. List
  • Chinese Soviet Republic
  • Provisional Government of the Republic of China
  • Reformed Government of the Republic of China
 refused to release a U.S. plane and its 24 crew members, until the U.S. administration apologized (more about this incident below). One can find many similar incidents in the annals of diplomacy. (8)

At the family level most of us have probably heard parents warning their children: "Apologize, or else!" or: "Say you're sorry!" (See Kramer-Moore & Moore, 2002, pp. 167-168, for several examples, as well as an analysis of the pathogenic family process involved). A well-known literary example appears in A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man:
   "--O, Stephen will apologize.
   Dante said:--O, if not, the eagles will come and pull out his eyes.
   --Pull out his eyes,/Apologize,/Apologize,/Pull out his eyes.
   /Apologize,/ Pull out his eyes,/Pull out his eyes,/Apologize."
   (Joyce, 1916/1965, p. 8.)


Both of these examples demonstrate the use of empty phrases. Those who extract an apology (as in the often used formula: "I demand an apology!") encourage whitewashing and the word magic (see Moore, 1995/96) inherent in substituting words for deeds (or maps for territories; see Korzybski, 1958).

2. Sorry for interrupting.

I know that you consider what I've done wrong or impolite im·po·lite  
adj.
Not polite; discourteous.



[Latin impol
. I wish I hadn't had to do it, but I had no choice. Given the same circumstances, I'd do it again. (a, b, c, d, e)

This polite formula has some practical value in that it smoothes interaction in formal social encounters. While it may also contain a modicum mod·i·cum  
n. pl. mod·i·cums or mod·i·ca
A small, moderate, or token amount: "England still expects a modicum of eccentricity in its artists" Ian Jack.
 of regret, it certainly lacks a promise of non-repetition. The following formula bears this out: "Excuse me! Excuse me!" (Same as the French "Pardon!"), said when pushing through a crowd, bumping into people repeatedly. (a, d)

3. I'm sorry you're sick (or have lost your job, or did not hit the jackpot).

I've got nothing to do with this, but if I could, I'd change it. I say this just to make you feel better, to show that I commiserate com·mis·er·ate  
v. com·mis·er·at·ed, com·mis·er·at·ing, com·mis·er·ates

v.tr.
To feel or express sorrow or pity for; sympathize with.

v.intr.
. (a)

We have moved further down on the "scale of compunction." While expressing misgivings about the addressee's situation, this speaker does not assume any responsibility for it. Consequently s/he can logically express no regret, nor offer any promises regarding the future. The above quoted Sino-American diplomatic incident comes close to this type of apologizing, but only from the American perspective. According to according to
prep.
1. As stated or indicated by; on the authority of: according to historians.

2. In keeping with: according to instructions.

3.
 Wanderer's report (2001) the solution of the diplomatic standoff hinged exactly on the ambiguity of "I'm sorry." The following excerpts bear out this interpretation:
   "... the United States issued a statement expressing 'sincere
   regret' over the lost Chinese pilot, and stating it is 'very sorry
   the entering of Chinese airspace and the landing did not have verbal
   clearance.' Chinese TV translated this 'very sorry' with a Chinese
   word connoting an admission of fault." (Wanderer, 2001, p. 218).

   "In his letter, Powell expressed regret for the missing Chinese
   pilot, presumed dead, after his fighter jet collided with the spy
   plane. But he stopped short of issuing an apology and instead urged
   Beijing to end the standoff." (CNN April 5, 2001).

   "'There was nothing to apologize for,' Powell told reporters in
   Paris on Wednesday. 'To apologize would have suggested that we
   had done something wrong and we accepted responsibility for having
   done something wrong. And we did not do anything wrong. Therefore,
   it was not possible to apologize.'" (CNN April 11, 2001).


We feel obligated ob·li·gate  
tr.v. ob·li·gat·ed, ob·li·gat·ing, ob·li·gates
1. To bind, compel, or constrain by a social, legal, or moral tie. See Synonyms at force.

2. To cause to be grateful or indebted; oblige.
 to add that the Chinese language permits four levels of apology, ranging from a mild 'sorry' to the formula used by a criminal in capital crimes (Marquand, 2001; Japanese has a similar wealth of apology expressions (9)). No wonder Seekins (2001) observed, in this specific context that: "... the politics of apologies is a fascinating, ambiguous blend of moral indignation and coercive arm twisting. In daily life as well as international relations international relations, study of the relations among states and other political and economic units in the international system. Particular areas of study within the field of international relations include diplomacy and diplomatic history, international law, , one needs to be most careful about saying 'I'm sorry.'"

4. Excuse me?

I didn't hear/understand you; could you please repeat what you've just said? I know this causes you some inconvenience and I wish I didn't have to do it, but I have no choice. (a, b, d)

This type bears some similarity to Number 2, above (both belong to the "polite" category), but it appears in different situations. It implies neither regret nor a promise of future avoidance. One can see its distance from apologizing through common dictionary substitutions, such as the less courteous "Come again?"

5. Sorry if I've hurt you.

I don't think I've done anything wrong, but if you feel I have, I'll give you the benefit of doubt and apologize. (a, e)

Not only does this speaker show no regret, s/he even condescends and blames the other for over-sensitivity (in contradistinction con·tra·dis·tinc·tion  
n.
Distinction by contrasting or opposing qualities.



contra·dis·tinc
 to the slight empathy discernible in Number 3, above). What choices does the addressee (communications) addressee - One to whom something is addressed. E.g. "The To, CC, and BCC headers list the addressees of the e-mail message". Normally an addressee will eventually be a recipient, unless there is a failure at some point (an e-mail "bounces") or the message is  have? By accepting this left-handed apology s/he accepts the label of touchiness. By rejecting it s/he becomes a bad sport.

6. Excuse rod! (ironic, with two exaggerated stresses).

I know that you'd prefer that I didn't exist, but I won't give you that pleasure. I have no intention of apologizing. (b)

Rather than illustrating apologizing, both this and the following type provide examples of verbal aggression (cf. Lederer & Jackson, 1968, pp. 141-144). Instead of offering an apology, the speaker hints that the recipient should feel guilty and apologize. A triple-message characterizes irony and sarcasm: The speaker's unstated agenda, and the two opposing messages these tropes contain. "Irony and sarcasm" wrote Kramer-Moore & Moore (2002, p. 137) "mask violence through clever repartees no less deadly to a relationship than less abstract forms of fighting." Recipients of such a message find themselves in a doublebind: If they complain of the insult, they lack a sense of humor Noun 1. sense of humor - the trait of appreciating (and being able to express) the humorous; "she didn't appreciate my humor"; "you can't survive in the army without a sense of humor"
sense of humour, humor, humour
; if they ignore it, they lack understanding.

7. Excuse me? (exaggeratedly incredulous).

I can't believe what I've just heard, so I pretend, ironically, that I've misheard you. (a, b, d)

As in both of the above types, the ambiguity of this utterance puts the listener at a disadvantage. If s/he takes it at face value (regarding it as Number 3, above) and repeats the message, the recipient will most likely retort: "I heard you the first time!" Any other response constitutes joining the fray.

To conclude this short stroll through the thorny garden of apology, we want to touch upon its relevance to matters psychological.

When perceived as sincere, an apology entails the admittance Admittance

The ratio of the current to the voltage in an alternating-current circuit. In terms of complex current I and voltage V, the admittance of a circuit is given by Eq. (1), and is related to the impedance of the circuit Z by Eq. (2).
 of guilt (sometimes with legal ramifications ramifications nplAuswirkungen pl ). According to Mussen, Conger & Kagan (1969) guilt ("moral anxiety" in Freudian terminology) "is a special state of anxiety that does not appear until about age 3 to 4" (p. 138). Both classical psychoanalytic theory Psychoanalytic theory is a general term for approaches to psychoanalysis which attempt to provide a conceptual framework more-or-less independent of clinical practice rather than based on empirical analysis of clinical cases.  and its neo-Freudian version concur: In the third stage of psychosexual development psychosexual development
n.
In Freudian psychoanalytic theory, the influence that sexual growth has on personality development from birth to adult life, with the phases of sexual maturation designated as oral, anal, phallic, latency, and genital.
 the superego superego: see psychoanalysis.
superego

In Freudian psychoanalytic theory, one of the three aspects of the human personality, along with the id and the ego.
 evolves. It contains two components: the ego ideal ego ideal
n.
In psychoanalytic theory, the part of one's ego that contains an idealized self based on those people, especially parents and peers, one admires and wishes to emulate.
, containing the desirable and rewarded aspects of one's personality, and the conscience, responsible for self-reproach and feelings of guilt. Apologizing releases the stress produced by guilt feelings Noun 1. guilt feelings - remorse caused by feeling responsible for some offense
guilt trip, guilty conscience, guilt

compunction, remorse, self-reproach - a feeling of deep regret (usually for some misdeed)
, thus serving as a defense mechanism. Sincere apologies, in which the individual takes upon self the responsibility for some wrongdoing, absolves one's conscience through so-called undoing. At the other end of the above continuum, the use of apology as a method for blaming the other puts the recipient on the defensive, and thus entails the projection of guilt.

Erikson's neo-Freudian approach regards the development of guilt as the negative outcome of the third crisis of psychosocial development psychosocial development Psychiatry Progressive interaction between a person and her environment through stages beginning in infancy, ending in adulthood, which loosely parallels psychosexual development. See Cognitive development. . Children who grow up in a restricting environment, where significant adults often block ambition and curiosity, soon experience guilt associated with inevitable transgressions. Instead of gaining this stage's highly valued outcome (i.e., initiative), they may become subject to self-doubt and to underachievement.

In existential psychology, primary guilt starts at birth: "Man's existential guilt consists in his failing to carry out the mandate to fulfill all his possibilities" (Boss, 1963, p. 270); such inescapable guilt ends only with the death of its bearer.

Virginia Satir's communication model (Satir, Stachowiak & Taschman, 1975; see Moore & Kramer, 1999/2000) also bears on this issue. Two of her four pathological communication patterns, the placater and the blamer, may both manipulate their target through "apologizing": the former by using types 1, 2, or 3 of the above list; the latter by resorting to types 5, 6, or 7 (type number 4 has a neutral quality in this respect).

The topic of forgiveness has created in recent years considerable psychological interest, as attested by the proliferation of texts dealing with it, e.g., Enright (2001), Enright & North (1998), Flanigan (1992), McCullough, Pargament & Thoresen (2000), the last one containing articles from the religious to the neuropsychological neu·ro·psy·chol·o·gy  
n.
The branch of psychology that deals with the relationship between the nervous system, especially the brain, and cerebral or mental functions such as language, memory, and perception.
 aspects of forgiveness. Many of these (e.g., Walrond-Skinner, 1998) dwell upon the positive, to some extent healing, aspects of the act of forgiving. Yet from the psychological point of view, any asking for forgiveness, even the most honest and sincere apologizing, has considerable disadvantages. In intimate relationships (such as family interactions) both the demanding and the acceptance of an apology, on the one hand, indicate unhealthy stratification and power differentials between the parties. The offering of an apology, on the other hand, especially when done repeatedly, may not only become manipulative (10), but also creates the impression that by a mere utterance one can erase previous deeds, without coping with the underlying conflict and the painful issue of guilt. As we have seen above, even more serious difficulties arise on the many occasions where the motivation behind an apology has some ambiguity: Guilt shifts back and forth between sender and recipient, and mystification mys·ti·fi·ca·tion  
n.
1. The act or an instance of mystifying.

2. The fact or condition of being mystified.

3. Something intended to mystify.

Noun 1.
 (Kramer-Moore & Moore, 2002, pp. 139-144) prevents congruent communication.

NOTES

(1.) Frequency in a 5-million-word sample used by grades 3 to 9 in 1969 (Carroll, Davis & Richman, 1971): apology and related words 40; excuse etc., 104; forgive etc., 43; pardon etc., 41; sorry 282.

(2.) In other languages one finds interesting, occasionally surprising, sources for words related to our topic:

Russian 'prostit' (v.) means both forgive and take leave; derives from 'prost,' simple, open, free, natural, which in its turn derives from 'pro-' and 'sto.' The former stands for the prefix 'for,' while the latter has to do with abundant, copious, rich, far, remote, away, in good repair.

Hungarian 'bocsanat' (n.) (pardon) derives from Turkish sources, where it indicates: free, empty, become or let free; related to 'bucsu': leave-taking, farewell, religious indulgence, pilgrimage. The root carries a double meaning analogous to Russian: 'megbocsat' (v.) (pardon) and 'elbocsat' (dismiss, release).

German 'Verzeihung' (n.) (pardon) denotes the negation of 'zeihen,' to accuse, related to 'zeigen,' to point, to show, and to 'sagen,' say. Hence 'verzeihen,' to refrain from, to forgive, pardon, excuse. Another German word related to this topic, 'bedauern,' regret, be sorry, derives from 'teuer' (dear).

Hebrew has several expressions: The root SLH SLH Small Luxury Hotels (website)
SLH Solera Holdings Inc. (San Ramon, CA)
SLH State Laboratory of Hygiene (Madison, Wisconsin)
SLH St Luke's Hospital
 (forgive, pardon) comes from Accadian, where it meant: to throw water (perhaps indicating some ancient forgiving custom). When used in this context, the root NTzL (apologize) means: remove from oneself. The root TzA'R, closest in meaning to English sorry, indicates sorrow, sadness. MHL MHL
abbr.
Master of Hebrew Literature
 (forgive, pardon) may derive from wipe away, clean. Finally KPR KPR Kawartha Pine Ridge (Canada)
KPR Kansas Public Radio
KPR Kennewick, Pasco, Richland (Tri-cities Washington)
KPR Kentucky Performance Report
KPR Ketopantoate Reductase
KPR Korean People's Republic
 (excuse; as in Yore Kippur or the Day of Atonement Day of Atonement
n.
See Yom Kippur.



[Translation of Hebrew yôm kippûr.]

Day of Atonement
Noun

same as Yom Kippur

Noun 1.
) derives either from Accadian (to sweep, to clean), or from Arabic (to cover).

(3.) "Saddam Hussein's apologies to the Kuwaiti people: 'We ask God's pardon for all the actions that have raised his ire in the past ... and in this spirit we similarly offer you our apologies.'"

(4.) See also the formula: "forgive us, pardon us, and grant us atonement" in the Jewish liturgy for Yom Kippur Yom Kippur [Heb.,=day of atonement], in Judaism, the most sacred holy day, falling on the 10th day of the Jewish month of Tishri (usually late September or early October). It is a day of fasting and prayer for forgiveness for sins committed during the year. .

(5.) Additional formulas and expressions abound:

I'm so sorry; you'll be sorry!; I'm sorry to hear that. Accept my apology; I owe you an apology; my [most] sincere apology; my apologies; a thousand apologies; I apologize in advance; a formal apology; 1 demand an apology.

Inexcusable; lame excuse; may I be excused?; I want [wish] to excuse myself; what's your excuse?

I beg for forgiveness; please forgive me; forgive and forget; to err is human "To Err is Human: Building a Safer Health System" is a groundbreaking report issued in 2000 by the U.S. Institute of Medicine which resulted in an increased awareness of U.S. medical errors. The push for patient safety that followed its release currently continues. , to forgive, divine; to understand is to forgive.

Tout comprendre c'est tout pardoner par·don·er  
n.
1. One that pardons: a pardoner of the sins of others.

2. A medieval ecclesiastic authorized to raise money for religious works by granting papal indulgences to contributors.
; pardon my French!

Related idioms, not using any of the above roots: to eat humble pie See under Humble.
to endure mortification; to submit or apologize abjectly; to yield passively to insult or humilitation; - a phrase derived from a pie made of the entrails or humbles 
, dirt, crow, one's own words.

(6.) Consider the nuances of the following: absolution absolution

In Christianity, a pronouncement of forgiveness of sins made to a person who has repented. This rite is based on the forgiveness that Jesus extended to sinners during his ministry.
, amnesty, atonement, clemency Leniency or mercy. A power given to a public official, such as a governor or the president, to in some way lower or moderate the harshness of punishment imposed upon a prisoner.

Clemency is considered to be an act of grace.
, compassion, compunction, confession, contrition con·tri·tion  
n.
Sincere remorse for wrongdoing; repentance. See Synonyms at penitence.

Noun 1. contrition - sorrow for sin arising from fear of damnation
contriteness, attrition
, exculpation, exoneration The removal of a burden, charge, responsibility, duty, or blame imposed by law. The right of a party who is secondarily liable for a debt, such as a surety, to be reimbursed by the party with primary liability for payment of an obligation that should have been paid by the first party. , forbearance, indulgence, getting off, mea culpa me·a cul·pa  
n.
An acknowledgment of a personal error or fault.



[Latin me culp
, mercy, penitence Penitence
Act of Contrition

prayer of atonement said after making one’s confession. [Christianity: Misc.]

Agnes, Sister

former Lady Laurentini; a penitent nun. [Br. Lit.
, regret, remission, remorse, repentance.

(7.) Note the expressions equivalent to the English "I am heartily sorry" italicized in German, French, Spanish and Latin:

Alle meine Sunden sind mir leid von Grund meines Herzens ... (Akt der Reue).

J'ai un tres grand regret de Vous avoir offense ... (Acte de Contrition).

Me pesa de todo corazon de haber pecado ... (Acto de contricion).

Ex toto corde poenitet me omnium meorum peccatorum ... (Actus Contritionis).

8. A few recent incidents involving the demand for a formal apology:

* China has demanded an apology from the United States United States, officially United States of America, republic (2005 est. pop. 295,734,000), 3,539,227 sq mi (9,166,598 sq km), North America. The United States is the world's third largest country in population and the fourth largest country in area.  for the NATO bombing of the Chinese Embassy in Belgrade

Main article: Targeting of civilian areas during Operation Allied Force
On May 7 1999 in Operation Allied Force, NATO bombs hit the Chinese Embassy in Belgrade, Yugoslavia, killing three Chinese journalists and outraging the Chinese public.
, Yugoslavia, the official Xinhua News Agency “Xinhua” redirects here. For other uses, see Xinhua (disambiguation).

The Xinhua News Agency (Simplified Chinese: 新华社; Traditional Chinese:
 reported Monday (5-10-99 CNN CNN
 or Cable News Network

Subsidiary company of Turner Broadcasting Systems. It was created by Ted Turner in 1980 to present 24-hour live news broadcasts, using satellites to transmit reports from news bureaus around the world.
).

* East Timorese protesters demand apology and reparations reparations, payments or other compensation offered as an indemnity for loss or damage. Although the term is used to cover payments made to Holocaust survivors and to Japanese Americans interned during World War II in so-called relocation camps (and used as well to  from the U.S. for Washington's support for Indonesian invasion and occupation of their country (7-4-00 AP).

* Japanese demand traditional apology from [US] sub commander (2-23-01 AP).

* South Korean President Kim Dae-jung
This is a Korean name; the family name is Kim.
Kim Dae-jung (Born December 3, 1925) is a former South Korean president and the 2000 Nobel Peace Prize recipient. He is the first Nobel laureate from Korea.
 has demanded that North Korea apologize for the "provocation" that sparked a naval battle that killed four South Korean sailors (7-2-02 BBC BBC
 in full British Broadcasting Corp.

Publicly financed broadcasting system in Britain. A private company at its founding in 1922, it was replaced by a public corporation under royal charter in 1927.
).

* North Korea demanded that Japan apologize and pay for its past colonial domination (10-30-02 Agence France-Presse).

* The United States said on Friday it had demanded an apology from Zimbabwe for detaining and questioning a U.S. diplomat for about an hour this week (2-15-03 CNN).

(9.) "I shall give the House the briefest of lessons in the Japanese way of apology. In English, one says, 'I am sorry,' or, 'I apologise,' and there are not many more ways of expressing apology. In Japanese, there are a great many ways. One says, 'shitsurei shimasu,' or, 'gomen nasai,' if one accidentally bumps into someone. The word used by the Japanese Prime Minister on behalf of the Japanese Government was 'owabi,' which is translated as 'apology.' That is a formal, high-level apology. Many representatives of the prisoners of war prisoners of war, in international law, persons captured by a belligerent while fighting in the military. International law includes rules on the treatment of prisoners of war but extends protection only to combatants.  and internees want the word 'shazai' to be used. It is not possible to translate 'shazai' other than in the same way as 'owabi'--'apology.' Many former prisoners of war and civilian internees argue ... that an apology is meaningless without further compensation." (Jane Griffiths, M. P., in the UK Parliament, 29 April, 1998). See also the following regarding yet another expression of apologizing in Japanese culture. "Sumimasen" means "I cannot make up for what you have done for me well enough! ... It's pro-forma, but the authorities will be impressed by how you've learned your lesson. That's sumimasen: apology without end. It's the Japanese version of throwing yourself on the mercy of the court" (Chrichton, 1992, p. 138).

(10.) In his foreword to Enright & North (1998), Archbishop Desmond Tutu writes: "When you say to me 'I'm sorry,' in my Christian understanding I am then constrained by the Gospel imperative to forgive" (pp. xiii-xiv).

REFERENCES

Boss, Medard (1963). Psychoanalysis and Daseinsanalysis. New York New York, state, United States
New York, Middle Atlantic state of the United States. It is bordered by Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and the Atlantic Ocean (E), New Jersey and Pennsylvania (S), Lakes Erie and Ontario and the Canadian province of
: Basic Books.

Carroll, J. B., Davis, P. & Richman, B. (1971). Word Frequency Book. Boston: Houghton Mifflin.

Chrichton, Michael (1992). Rising sun. NY: Ballantine.

Enright, Robert D. (2001). Forgiveness and Choice. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association The American Psychological Association (APA) is a professional organization representing psychology in the US. Description and history
The association has around 150,000 members and an annual budget of around $70m.
.

Enright, Robert D. & North, Joanna (Eds.) (1998). Exploring Forgiveness. Madison, WI: University of Wisconsin Press The University of Wisconsin Press (or UW Press), founded in 1936, is a university press that is part of the Graduate School of the University of Wisconsin-Madison, United States. It published under its own name and the imprint The Popular Press. .

Flanigan, Beverly (1992). Forgiving the Unforgivable. New York: Macmillan.

Joyce, James (1965). A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. Harmondsworth: Penguin (originally published 1916).

Korzybski, Alfred (1958). Science and Sanity, 4th ed. Lakeville, CT: International Non-Aristotelian Library.

Kramer-Moore, Daniela & Moore, Michael (2002). Life Imitates Art--Encounters Between Family Therapy and Literature. New York: Solomon Press.

Lederer, William J. & Jackson, Don D. (1968). The Mirages of Marriage. New York: Norton.

Marquand, Robert (2001). US 'sorry' heard in Beijing as an apology. Christian Science Christian Science, religion founded upon principles of divine healing and laws expressed in the acts and sayings of Jesus, as discovered and set forth by Mary Baker Eddy and practiced by the Church of Christ, Scientist.  Monitor, April 12.

McCullough, Michael E., Pargament, Kenneth I., & Thoresen, Carl E. (Eds.) (2000). Forgiveness--Theory, Research, and Practice. New York: Guilford.

Moore, Michael (1995/1996). Pathological communication patterns in Heller's Catch-22. ETC: A Review of General Semantics, 52, 431-439.

Moore, Michael (2001). "This is like deja vu all over again": Eight types of tautology tautology

In logic, a statement that cannot be denied without inconsistency. Thus, “All bachelors are either male or not male” is held to assert, with regard to anything whatsoever that is a bachelor, that it is male or it is not male.
. ETC: A Review of General Semantics, 58, 151-165.

Moore, Michael & Kramer, Daniela (1999/2000). Satir for beginners: Incongruent in·con·gru·ent  
adj.
1. Not congruent.

2. Incongruous.



in·congru·ence n.
 communication patterns in romantic fiction. ETC. A Review of General Semantics, 56, 429-437.

Mussen, Paul H., Conger, John J. & Kagan, Jerome (1969). Child Development and Personality, 3rd ed. New York: Harper & Row.

Satir, Virginia, Stachowiak, J., & Taschman, H. A. (1975). Helping Families to Change. New York: Aronson.

Seekins, Donald (2001). Politics, power and apologies. Ryukyu Shimpo Internet Weekly News, May 14.

Walrond-Skinner, Sue (1998). The function and role of forgiveness in working with couples and families: clearing the ground. Journal of Family Therapy, 20, 3-19.

Wanderer, Robert (2001). Swallows return to Capistrano, sort of. ETC: A Review of General Semantics, 58, 216-218.

Michael Moore, Daniela Kramer-Moore is a Senior Lecturer at Oranim, College of Education of the Kibbutz Movement in Tivon, Israel. Dr. Michael Moore, a social psychologist, is an Associate Professor and Head of the Department of Education in Science and Technology at the Technion, Israel Institute of Technology.
COPYRIGHT 2003 Institute of General Semantics
No portion of this article can be reproduced without the express written permission from the copyright holder.
Copyright 2003, Gale Group. All rights reserved. Gale Group is a Thomson Corporation Company.

 Reader Opinion

Title:

Comment:



 

Article Details
Printer friendly Cite/link Email Feedback
Author:Moore, Michael
Publication:ETC.: A Review of General Semantics
Geographic Code:1USA
Date:Jun 22, 2003
Words:3688
Previous Article:Abstractions.
Next Article:Letters to the editor.
Topics:



Related Articles
John Paul's "purification of memory".
Papal apology makes history.
Contrastive analysis of speech acts: what do we do with the research findings?
What makes for a good apology. (Guest Column).
In this issue.
Verne Reierson, 1915-2003.
Pardon me, Mr. President, but we have a couple of problems.
NETWORKS REACT TO JACKSON GRAMMY INVITE WITHDRAWN; 'ER' BREAST SCENE GETS CUT.
'Apology' legislation gives wrongdoers a safe haven.

Terms of use | Copyright © 2014 Farlex, Inc. | Feedback | For webmasters