PLENTY OF THRUSTS, PARRIES IN BRASH 'ON GUARD'.

Byline: Evan Henerson Staff Writer

A HEARTY phooey to the legendary ``Nevers thrust.''

That would be the ``lights out'' fencing maneuver pioneered by the Duc de Nevers (played by Vincent Perez) in the French film ``On Guard.'' When an individual gets Nevers thrust-ed, he receives a sharp rapier point right between the eyes. Meaning - duh! - he dies.

Probably half a dozen ruffians get dispatched in this manner during the umpteenth film adaptation of Paul Feval's adventure novel ``Le Bossu.'' And director Philippe de Boca displays every single one.

For pity's sake, why?

Granted, you can't have a swashbuckling movie where a legendary blade famously stabs his victims in the earlobe. But these graphic, between-the-eyes piercings mar what would should be a rollicking Saturday matinee adventure. Forget squeamishness, the stabs are jolting and not particularly necessary.

Otherwise, Perez (while he's alive), Daniel Auteuil, Fabrice Luchini and Philippe Noiret all seem to be having a high old time cavorting around 18th-century France in the interests of love, loyalty, birthrights and fencing. Art director Bernard Vezat and costumer Christian Gasc deck out the proceedings like something out of a period canvas, and the plot's general silliness whizzes artfully by.

Our hero is the brash swordsman Lagardere (Auteuil, looking like Sean Penn with bad hair extensions). Unable to prove a traitor, Lagardere casts his lot with Nevers, accompanying the duke on a delicate assignment to the Castle Caylus where Nevers weds the beautiful Blanche (Claire Nebout) and claims the heir he unknowingly fathered.

Treachery rears its peruked head in the form of Nevers' cousin Gonzague (Luchini) who, next in line to inherit the Nevers fortune, looks to off the duke and his progeny. The plan nearly succeeds, leaving Lagardere to raise Nevers' child and swear vengeance on his friend's assassin. Fast forward 16 years. The child is now the beautiful Aurore (Marie Gillain), who is quite handy with a blade herself. Lagardere finally encounters his opportunity to make matters right and restore Aurore's birthright. Of course, the plan involves posing as a hunchback (French word: Bossu).

Yes, the proceedings are as daffy as I've just described them, but Feval's book - published serially in 1857 - remains a film-friendly favorite. ``On Guard'' feels like a Dumas-esque romp with its white hats and black mustaches equally cardboard. De Broca (who also co-wrote with Jean Cosmos) gives it a frisky energy with plenty of improbable, against- the-odds sword fights and a ``shock the market'' ruse that would likely have Wall Street believing that Feval was eerily prescient.

Perez, who has the great wisdom not to play this straight, all but walks away with the film as the frivolous, fuzz-brained Nevers. It takes a certain insouciance to outduel the leading man and cheerfully proposition him a few scenes later.

But there's ``On Guard'' for you: a tale with the right tone and - at least where the duels are concerned - too sharp a point.

ON GUARD (LE BOSSU) - Two and one half stars

(Not rated: action violence, brief nudity)

Starring: Daniel Auteuil, Vincent Perez, Fabrice Luchini.

Director: Philippe de Broca.

Running time: 2 hrs. 8 min.

Playing: Landmark's Cecchi Gori Fine Arts Theatre; Laemmle's Fallbrook 7, West Hills; Edwards University 6, Irvine.

In a nutshell: A few too many graphic sword thrusts mar what would otherwise be a popcorn romp.

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Photo:

Vincent Perez is the famed swordsman Duc de Nevers.