Our fifth miracle.

Not many people get to experience five miracles in their lifetime. But gratefully, our family did. Our fifth miracle happened on October 30, 2003.

I knew I would be "late." I always am when it comes to due dates and actually birthing. I told my midwife that this was what my body did, so we padded my due date in hopes of avoiding the regulated mess that can occur when you get much past your "due date" in British Columbia.

As I rounded the forty-week mark, it was no surprise to my husband or me that nothing eventful happened. I had experienced nice warm-up tightenings for several weeks, but nothing that told me birth was imminent.

Then, on October 29, I woke up at 4:30 AM to some stronger and more consistent contractions. I lay there, letting the sensations rise and fall within me, and thought that today was to be the day! After a while, I decided I had better get a few things ready for the birth. I dragged the birth pool out, brought the birth supplies down to the basement, and generally busied myself with housekeeping.

A short while later I realized I hadn't felt any sensations for a while. I stopped and took some time to listen to what my body was saying. The contractions had stopped. I decided I had better get back to bed and get some more sleep before the rest of the family woke up and my day began.

During the rest of the day, I took a few long walks to try to rekindle labor, but to no avail. I could see how easy it would be to lose hope and feel frustrated with a labor that wouldn't build up in strength. But instead of succumbing to those feelings, I made sure I kept my spirits up by remembering that the timing of this birth was completely out of my hands and, with or without my doing anything, this baby would be born when she or he was ready and not a moment earlier.

The next day began the same way--awake at 4:30 AM with contractions, but this time, instead of getting up and beginning the day, I stayed in bed and allowed myself to daydream about if today would be the day I would meet and hold my new baby. I drifted in and out of sleep, waking if a contraction was more powerful than usual.

The morning went on and I sent Rich to work and the older boys to school, and decided not to wait and wonder all day. I would know if labor was getting more serious, and would call everyone home if things got underway. It felt nice to go about my day, freeing myself from the watched pot syndrome.

Around noon, I decided to make an appointment with my chiropractor for an adjustment. The prelabor contractions were especially hurting my symphisys pubis, and my back was particularly achy. My contractions were just a bit more powerful at this point, but still nothing too serious. I received an adjustment and my pelvis felt a great deal better. When I had a contraction, I no longer felt like the baby was trying to push through the front of my pelvis.

Back home, sitting on the birth ball was somewhat helpful, but kneeling on the ground leaning over the birth ball was better. This really helped with the mounting back pressure. Two-year-old Emily liked watching, holding my hand, and stroking my cheek. She was a wonderful little labor assistant.

A little while later, I mentioned to Rich that maybe it would be a good time to start filling the tub, as I was beginning to feel the draw toward water. He was concerned that if this was still early labor the water would get too cool before the birth.

Instead, he suggested I have a shower. I stepped into the shower and let the warm water run all over me. It was a wonderful feeling. I tried positions that kept my body open and upright, while letting the water pelt against my back. I stayed there for a long time, but started to think about the birth pool again. I didn't want to use up all the hot water in case I needed it sooner rather than later.

I got out of the shower and went to the bedroom. I piled up a bunch of pillows on our bed and leaned over them. It was comfortable, but I still longed for the water. I called out to Rich that perhaps it was time to start filling the tub. I was beginning to feel the sensations rise and fall higher and deeper than before.

We hooked up the hose to the sink and began filling the tub. Soon the water level was just deep enough to get into the tub, though not deep enough to really submerge into. I knelt down in the water and swished my arms around. The water felt good, but because we used hotter water to begin filling the tub, the temperature wasn't quite right yet.

Labor was getting a bit more intense, so we called Rich's mother to come over and help make sure the children ate dinner, as well as to be with them while the birth experience unfolded.

While we waited for Gramma McCue to arrive, Rich and I discussed the idea of calling the midwife. I felt comfortable with the idea of birthing this baby without any extra help. But Rich felt differently, and didn't feel comfortable being there as the sole aid if things varied too much from normal. I had to respect that, and also had the strong impression that all would be well regardless of whether our midwife came or not.

So around 5:00 we called Angela to let her know that it looked like we'd be having this baby tonight sometime. She was en route to a client and we told her to go do her visit and to call and check on us before she left there. We also made a call to Charlotte to let her know that now would be the time to come over and start videotaping the labor and birth.

A few contractions later, as I rocked leaning over the birth ball, I started to really feel like labor was coming along efficiently and quickly. Rich watched me and began to wonder aloud if he should call Angela again and have her come sooner. I had no way of knowing how long this labor would take, but things felt like they were moving along nicely. He took that as a cue to call Angela again. She changed her plans and headed over.

Shortly, Gramma McCue arrived. She came downstairs to see how we were laboring and, being the mother of seven, she saw a need she could assist with right away. Rich had recently broken both his arms and wasn't able to apply hard counterpressure on my back. So she came over and started to press on and massage my lower back. It felt absolutely wonderful. Unfortunately, she could only stay for a bit as the children were rallying for her attention, but it was good while it lasted.

Charlotte arrived around 5:15 with her video equipment. She quietly went about setting up her camera and generally tried to be in the background.

Angela arrived around 5:30 and started bringing in her equipment. She knelt down beside me and asked how I was feeling. I let her know I was doing fine--just laboring along.

My sensations were rising and falling more steadily and with increasing intensity. I needed to focus for each contraction and the people around me sensed that.

With labor progressing so steadily, Angela asked if I wanted to get back into the pool again. I climbed into the warm water and it felt heavenly. I found comfort previously by kneeling and leaning over, so I assumed that same position in the water, leaning over the side of the tub.

I found my rhythm, and as Angela assembled her equipment and Charlotte videotaped, I rocked my pelvis through several more sensations. Rich provided as much counter pressure as he could, and before I knew it, I was feeling those gentle urges to push. They were quiet at first. Angela noticed and asked if it was time to call the secondary midwife. I mentioned that I thought we were moving into second stage labor, but that I wasn't certain.

Soon the sensations were completely powerful and removed all doubt, so Angela called the secondary midwife. Sometime during this part of labor, my two oldest sons came down to witness labor. They left once when I got more vocal, but returned again soon after.

I had learned a lot from my labor with Emily, about how to not hold back or interfere with my body's ability to birth my baby, especially during second stage. So I tried to let the power run through me and out.

A few contractions later, I checked myself to see if I could feel our baby's head. I couldn't feel anything and momentarily feared that this part of labor would take a long time. But I kept my hand on my vulva and was soon able to feel my body begin to open up to allow this baby to be born. A few contractions later, I felt the head crown and sneak away.

Next contraction, the head came and stayed. I knelt upright for the rest of that contraction, as the intense sensation of my tissues fanning out was all consuming. But with the next contraction, the head was born. I recall repeating a few times in disbelief that the head was out! It was quickly followed by the shoulders and the rest of this amazing little pink body. It was a few minutes before 7:00 PM.

I turned around and sat down to get my baby from the water. This little one was all tangled in the cord from her neck to her torso, and Angela helped me figure out how to unravel her so I could cuddle her close.

I didn't notice at the time, but Rich's mom had come down with the two younger children. They had all been able to witness their youngest sibling be born in natural, normal circumstances. This was a family event that I think will impact them and their views on positive birth forever.

Michael was the first to notice that we had been blessed with another beautiful daughter, and let us know that our baby was a "she." I doubled checked, and sure enough, no penis!

I cuddled her up, trying to keep most of her body warm in the water. Rich helped me take my bra up so she could nestle right into a breast. I tried to convince her to nurse right away, but she wasn't interested for the first few minutes. She had lots on her mind, and had been enjoying a good lusty cry as we tried to let her know she was safe and sound at home. Eventually she became interested.

Sometime around then, the secondary midwife arrived. She had missed the event, but that was okay. She was a wonderful midwife I'm sure, but she just hadn't been in the birth daydream I envisioned.

Emily made sure prior to the birth that she would be allowed into the pool after the baby was born. So, with the official okay, she undressed and hopped into the water with her mom and new baby sister.

I'm not sure how much time passed as we ogled our newest baby. We took pictures and generally gazed at this amazing little miracle. Someone brought down the birthday cake I had previously baked for the event, and after singing "Happy Birthday," most of us had a piece of cake to celebrate.

About forty-five minutes later, Angela expressed a desire to have the placenta be born. I got onto all fours, with Jillian still nursing, and with some convincing, I was able to push the placenta out. At that point, the tub filled up with red from a gush of blood, and with the water cooling, I decided to get out of the tub. Angela asked if we wanted to cut the umbilical cord. Rich did the cutting and then took our new baby while I got out of the tub and toweled off.

Angela asked if she could do the new baby exam at this point, as well as weigh her. All was well, of course, and Jillian weighed 8 pounds 4 ounces.

Her brothers and sister took turns holding her, and staking claim over whose baby she was. When they all had a turn, they got tucked into bed with promises for more turns to hold Jillian in the morning. At that point, Jillian and I nestled into bed together and got ready for some rest, while Rich sent out a quick e-mail to family and friends sharing our good news, before joining us in bed.

The house cleared out shortly after that, and Rich and I had some quiet time to ourselves to look over our newest baby. She was so small and red and perfect. We turned the lights off and went to sleep beside our little angel.

I woke up around 3:00 that night and found myself unable to go back to sleep. I think my endorphins were still in high gear, and I got out of bed so as not to disturb my fellow bedmates. I came out to the kitchen and began to digest the events of the last few hours. What an amazing birth! I had the hands-off birth I had been wanting, and felt my child be born with my own hands. I was the first to touch and hold my baby. In fact, no gloved hand had touched her at all. What a lovely, normal miracle.

So now we are a family of seven. It's a perfect number for us. And we're so glad Jillian is in our lives. We couldn't imagine life without her.

--Heather McCue is a certified CBE through ALACE. She resides in Victoria, BC, Canada, along with her husband and five children. She can be reached at [e-mail]