OH, BROTHER! RECALCITRANT RELATIVES A POLITICAL CUSTOM.

Byline: Joseph Honig Local View

REP. Darrell Issa, the man who would be governor, has been plagued by long-ago charges he stole three cars as a very young man.

To hear the candidate tell it, he doesn't have a crime problem. Like so many high-profile politicians, he simply has a brother problem.

One theft allegation was reported in a newspaper; it was never proved or prosecuted. Another, in his hometown of Cleveland, resulted in an indictment but no prosecution. And a third, surfacing just last week, stemmed from a 1980 San Jose case dismissed for lack of evidence.

``I do not steal,'' the conservative San Diego-area Republican told the San Francisco Chronicle. Issa went on to blame a brother, William, for much of his grief.

``When people ask me why I got into the car alarm business,'' the electronics mogul was quoted as saying, ``I tell them the truth. It was because my brother was a car thief.''

Like it or not, Issa, who's spent more than $1 million to recall Gov. Gray Davis, is part of an electoral tradition most candidates could live without: Brothers who become political punch lines. And liabilities.

So far, two of President George W. Bush's three brothers - one is governor of Florida - have kept their noses clean. One, however, Neil Bush, joined 11 co-defendants paying almost $50 million to settle a negligence lawsuit over a bank failure.

In the very recent past, Americans gaped and giggled at the ne'er-do- well antics of Roger Clinton, whose half-brother, the president, had his own brushes with scandal.

A onetime drug dealer and ex-convict, Roger Clinton made third-rate music with a fourth-rate rock band. Aside from crooning, he was a glorified gofer to Bill's Hollywood pals, producers Harry and Linda Bloodworth Thomason. Roger was pudgy and unaccomplished. He also seemed less than reluctant to make political connections pay. He got nowhere fast.

Once in awhile there'd be a Roger sighting - a drunk driving arrest or occasional talk show appearance. But the little brother was strictly comic relief.

That was until Bill Clinton's term ended and Washington stood still, shell-shocked by one questionable presidential pardon after another. Not surprisingly, Roger got one. What caused jaws to drop were charges - denied by all involved - that Roger lobbied for six other felons seeking White House largess.

(That Bill Clinton also had brother-in-law problems is another story. Recall that first lady Hillary Clinton's brother, Hugh Rodham, returned a $400,000 fee for helping pardon applicants.)

And then there was Billy. As in Carter. As in outspoken, beer-swilling gas station operator who had his own moments in the limelight.

Moments President Jimmy Carter might have loved to pass up. If only he could have.

Billy Carter smoked, drank to excess and, on occasion, had the temerity to publicly disagree with his presidential sibling. Mostly, he came off as a charming lout or loutish charmer, depending on one's taste for rural humor.

Billy also liked money, so much so he tried to cash in on family ties. Remember ``Billy Beer''? The younger Carter lent his name and likeness to a brew rejected by drinkers everywhere. This was before he signed on as a Washington lobbyist for Libya, then, as now, an anti-American rogue state.

Billy Carter, though, didn't have a White House monopoly on character flaws. A decade earlier, there was Sam Houston Johnson, younger brother to President Lyndon Baines Johnson.

Sam Houston was, in anyone's book, a full-blown alcoholic. He was also far from shy when it came to holding court in Texas or Washington watering holes. Thus LBJ's aides were occasionally preoccupied with keeping Sam Houston out of sight. Well-lubricated, he'd spend weeks holed up in the White House, far from public view.

Richard Nixon, perhaps our most scandal-plagued leader, had a brother named Donald who caused more than his share of problems. Donald Nixon was a businessman with a knack for failure. He even dreamed up ``Nixonburgers.'' There were few takers.

More serious was a $205,000 loan Donald received from eccentric billionaire Howard Hughes; there were suspicions Hughes sought to influence then Vice President Nixon. It didn't help when the veep talked to the IRS on Hughes' behalf.

Recently, one of the more astonishing examples of political black sheepism was on display when William Bulger, former Massachusetts state Senate leader, was grilled about his fugitive brother, James, an alleged mob chieftain.

William Bulger, now University of Massachusetts president, was given congressional immunity to answer questions about his brother's vanishing act. James ``Whitey'' Bulger, on the lam for eight years, is suspected of committing multiple homicides.

The politician stood firm. Said he hadn't talked to Whitey since the gangster dropped from sight. Didn't have a clue to his whereabouts, either. William Bulger added he'd consistently tried - and failed - to get Whitey to reform.

Darrell Issa, now answering almost ancient allegations, might very well sympathize.