ODDS & ENDS.

His dad said that our work "will not be finished in the first hundred days." Now--a hundred days after the deaths of John F. Kennedy, Jr.; his wife, Carolyn Bessette Kennedy; and sister-in-law, Lauren Bessette--his father's words ring true. The words and images devoted to reporting this tragedy and reflecting on its meaning are legion. Some reflections have been dark and deadly, like the night that took these young people's lives. Other reflections have been light and bright, like the sunny day their ashes were committed to the sea.

Most amazing to me were the newspaper columns, letters to the editor, and talk-show palaver that criticized the amount of coverage this event received. Such efforts created a contemporary catch-22, significantly adding to what they criticized: the volume of ink and speak focused on JFK, Jr. His dad also said that our work will not be completed "in the first thousand days." I suspect this is true for all who try to figure out the meaning of lives and deaths.

JFK, Jr., often tagged "the Crown Prince of Camelot," was not the Student Prince. He represented an America not where the prince has to grow up to be king, but an America where he does not have to. He was the Student Prince in reverse, who chose a life for himself rather than one fated through personal genealogy and national expectations. That is exquisitely American.

Christianity gives over each November to commemorate and celebrate the dead. John F. Kennedy, Jr., his wife, and sister-in-law now join countless and often nameless souls remembered during November. Perhaps the caustic and the caring, not finding common ground on the coverage and significance of these Americans' deaths, might pause this November to remember all our dead, beloved and hated, famous and unknown, including these three young people who disappeared in a plane nearing Martha's Vineyard this past summer.

November holds still other memories. JFK, Jr. was born in November. He saluted his dad's body on his third birthday, the day his father, our president, was buried, the morning of November 25.

November came early this year--in July--when JFK, Jr.'s plane disappeared. Now we relive July in November as we remember these people in the plane along with all our dead. This is the opportunity and responsibility that awaits Christians every November because we will never finally figure out life and death to everyone's satisfaction.

His dad had it right when he said that our work would not be completed "even perhaps in our lifetime on this planet."

PETER GILMOUR ([e-mail]) teaches at the Institute of Pastoral Studies of Loyola University Chicago.