Now you see Bet - now you don't; Soap watch.
SHE'S back. But make the most of Bet because in a couple of weeks she disappears again. It seems that Julie Goodyear couldn't take the pressure.
So they've called in Maureen Lipman to the Street to take over behind the bar. The mind boggles, it really does.
Anyway, in a cloud of cigarette smoke, leopard print and gold, Bet appears at the Rovers in the middle of Betty's retirement do. She raises a few eyebrows among the regulars who have never met her. Oh, you don't say. Though she looked quite normal, and quiet really, like they'd never notice.
Anyway, Rita is still mad at her for some reason that I can't remember. When did she leave anyway? It must have been years ago. Eventually Bet tells Ken and Deirdre that she's back for a court case and all is not well. It never were with Bet, were it love?
Elsewhere, Sarah is showing what a little minx she is, getting all gooey-eyed over Aidan, and letting him lead her astray. And Les has rats in his house. Ach well, they say like attracts like, don't they?
And things aren't looking too good for Mike's new deputy Joe. He's messing up at work, and Geena is not so keen on him now she knows he's an ex-con. She's so forgiving that one.
IT REALLY is puerile stuff this week, as Emmerdale tries to get in tune with the 21st century and goes Big Brother on us with more webcam footage of Betty.
And when she snogs Len to get her own back on Seth, it's time to turn off.
Elsewhere, Zoe gets madder and madder in a storyline that really has no place in a 7pm soap opera which normally deals with things like church fetes, pet dogs being put down and petty jealousies between the locals.
More in keeping with Emmerdale is the storyline with Viv being deluded by her daughter's modelling success, thinking she can cash in on her success, and relive her youth.
Donna is not so sure. This is more like Emmerdale. Shouldn't you always stick to what you know?
Like Tricia and Marlon trying to butter up an old lady so they can get her cottage. Puerile, simple, but exactly what a soap like Emmerdale should be about.
BEV is upset this week because she is nearly 30. The dreaded three-oh. I don't know why she's bothered ... she doesn't look a day over, ooh, 35.
Anyway, she decides to have a party, but it turns into a disastrous affair. Hardly a shock is it? Considering where she lives, and her track record.
Elsewhere Mike ends up hitting Dr Parr as Beth is discharged from hospital. She was there, remember, because of the good doc's mistake. Bring back that boring Darren one, all is forgiven.
It was lovely to see Raymond Quinn win a gong at the Soap Awards for portraying Anthony, who once again is in turmoil this week as the reconstruction of Imelda's disappearance takes place. Jerome is feeling neglected. And a wee birdie tells me he's leaving very soon. Thank God.
CAN you believe Mandy is still in two minds over Laura? Was her eyesight, or her brain, affected in that crash?
Anyway, unlucky passenger Adam is blaming Mandy for all his woes, once again. He conveniently forgets that he got into the car with Mandy and refused to get out. And that she was going through a crap time when he was giving her major grief. Ah, you reap what you sow, young man.
As for Beth, well, who cares? So, on to OB and, oops, no, he's not interesting either. Neither is Jamie, and neither are Alex and Anna who really need their heads knocked together, or to split up once and for all and get over it.