NO DEAD ZONES FOR INTENSE `CELLULAR'.

Byline: Bob Strauss Film Critic

THERE IS TRASH. And there is Larry Cohen-generated trash. Happily, ``Cellular'' is very much the latter.

With all due respect to director David R. Ellis (``Final Destination 2'') and screenwriter Chris Morgan, who reportedly put a lot of the humor and L.A. atmosphere into this ticking clock thriller, original writer Cohen's wayward imagination informs every scene. The director of such semi-sublime junk as ``It's Alive!'' and ``Q - The Winged Serpent'' and writer of things like ``Maniac Cop,'' Cohen has a gift for well-plotted exploitation that pops with clever pop-culture references.

And ``Cellular'' is worked to within an inch of its life. Like Cohen's previous script for ``Phone Booth,'' it's all about staying connected. But instead of being pinned down in a fixed position, the reluctant hero of ``Cellular'' must keep up his end of the conversation while on a wild, geographically nonsensical ride up and down L.A.'s Westside.

When Jessica, a Brentwood science teacher (played by Kim Basinger in fishnet stockings, which is something of a two-for-one joke right there), is kidnapped and locked in an attic, she manages to get a signal out from a smashed phone. It happens to ring the cell of surf dude slacker Ryan (Chris Evans). Of course, he thinks her frantic story is a prank, but he does her bidding long enough to realize that he's her family's only hope of survival.

Which no one else, of course, is willing to take him seriously about. Several car-jackings, miles of dangerous driving and every mobile phone annoyance imaginable later, hordes of bad guys, good cops (like William H. Macy's, though he'd rather retire and open a day spa), bad cops, bikinied Heal-the-Bay babes and more congregate for a crazily complicated climax on and around the Santa Monica Pier.

It's actually quite suspenseful in places, often hilarious even when working the tiredest of gags (loved that recurring, obnoxious lawyer), and a well-detailed, fevered fantasy of how one sunny day in L.A. can go terribly, entertainingly wrong. Every implausible thriller should have so much worth dialing into.

Bob Strauss, [phone]

bob.strauss(at)dailynews.com

CELLULAR - Three stars

(PG-13: violence, language)

Starring: Kim Basinger, Chris Evans, William H. Macy, Jason Statham.

Director: David R. Ellis.

Running time: 1 hr. 29 min.

Playing: Wide release.

In a nutshell: Cheesy but lively thriller about a kidnapped woman whose only hope is a cell phone connection to an L.A. surfer dude. Twisty, funny, exciting and very silly.

CAPTION(S):

photo

Photo:

Kim Basinger stars as a kidnapped Brentwood science teacher whose only hope of escape is a surfer dude on the other end of the line in ``Cellular.''