NO CURE FOR WHAT AILS `X-MEN'.

Byline: Glenn Whipp Film Critic

There was much understandable hand-wringing after director Bryan Singer left ``X-Men: The Last Stand'' at the altar two years ago in order to run away with true love, ``Superman Returns.'' Singer was replaced by Brett Ratner -- not a good trade, especially for those dozen people anxiously awaiting the much-delayed start of ``Rush Hour 3.''

But the main problem that has bedeviled the ``X-Men'' movies -- too many characters -- isn't of Ratner's making, and given that ``The Last Stand'' adds even more mutants to the mix while lopping a good half-hour off the running time, it's hard to lay all the blame on Ratner for the film's sketchiness.

Sure, there's less attention to story than in the past, and an even greater emphasis on action set pieces at the expense of the characters. But give him this: Ratner dutifully delivers the goods with all of his signature style (i.e. anonymous), benefitting from the freedom that comes from directing the closing chapter in this particular comic-book saga, although spin-offs are said to be in the works.

Being the last of its kind means that the movie's action--junkie screenwriters Zak Penn (``X2,'' ``Elektra'') and Simon Kinberg (``Mr. & Mrs. Smith,'' ``XXX'') can dispense with characters almost as fast as they can add them. Most X-fans could easily come up with a short list of mutants they'd like to deep-six. (Pyro, Iceman, Cyclops -- and here Rogue would top mine.) Most fans would probably also wish that killing characters offered consequences and provoked emotions that went beyond the perfunctory.

Don't look for any genuine feeling here. The thrust of the third ``X- Men'' installment has a drug company (the 21st century repository of evil), run by the father of a mutant, offering a serum that can ``cure'' mutants. ``Since when did we become a disease?'' Halle Berry's Storm wonders in what is probably the only relevant line ever uttered by the miscast actress.

Magneto (Ian McKellen, elevating yet another summer popcorn flick) predictably uses the development to agitate fellow rebel mutants, saying the vaccine is nothing short of a government-mandated genocide. Professor Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart) has less to say on the subject, perhaps because the presumed-dead Jean Grey (Famke Janssen) has returned from her watery grave, minus the ``psychic blocks'' he embedded in her brain when she was a kid.

Here's the movie's best idea: The bland Jean Grey is now the Phoenix, instinct overriding intellect, a crazy redhead unable to control her powers, which makes her both furious and delirious and terrified, sometimes all at once. Her two father figures -- Xavier and Magneto -- now must contend with a woman whose powers exceed their own.

Singer would have mined this concept for all it was worth. Not here. Instead, the Phoenix exists as much to give Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) heart palpitations. And it's not the movie's only half-realized notion. The ``cure'' has been facilitated by the abilities of a mutant kid who disables the powers of other mutants when they are near him.

Magneto needs the kid. So does the movie, but he's just a plot device instead of a fully realized character.

The reason for this is pure utility: ``The Last Stand'' is as much ``The Fantastic Four'' as it is an ``X-Men'' movie, a just-

for-fun exercise in excess. Why bother with ideas when you can have Juggernaut (Vinnie Jones) busting through walls, or Callisto (Dania Ramirez) zipping this way and that in an effort to pummel Storm, or Dr. Hank McCoy (Kelsey Grammer) busting out his inner Beast when diplomacy fails? There's also a porcupine mutant, an angel and characters named Multiple Man and Kitty Pryde, not to mention all the other mutants from the first two movies.

The overpopulated, vision-free movie contains barely enough moments to satisfy both casual fans and fanatics (who should definitely stay through the closing credits for a final, pivotal revelation) while leaving each wanting more. It's safe, solid, spiritless -- in short, emblematic of summer ``blockbuster'' entertainment, circa 2006.

Glenn Whipp, [phone]

[e-mail]

X-MEN: THE LAST STAND - Two and one half stars

(PG-13: intense action violence, sexual content, language)

Starring: Ian McKellen, Hugh Jackman, Famke Janssen, Patrick Stewart.

Director: Brett Ratner.

Running time: 1 hr. 43 min.

Playing: In wide release.

In a nutshell: Dutiful finish to the trilogy that contains some interesting ideas that are only half-realized because of mutant overpopulation and unfortunate choice of filmmakers.

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Passions run high between Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) and Jean Grey (Famke Janssen) in ``X-Men: The Last Stand.''