NO COMMENT.

The Poverty Myth

An invitation to a panel discussion at the conservative Cato Institute in Washington, D.C.: "Have we suffered from lackluster productivity and falling real wages since 1973? According to a new book from Cato Institute adjunct scholar W. Michael Cox and journalist Richard Alm, that perception is not just wrong, it's spectacularly wrong. We're much better off than we were a generation ago. We have more assets, more leisure time, and higher quality goods. Indeed, the poorest Americans have many material goods that weren't available to middle-class families in 1971. In this talk, Cox and Alm will take aim at the `myths of rich and poor' and ask why people believe so many things that aren't true about our economy."

Sensitive Folk

From an article in The Washington Post about a folk concert featuring Carole King, Mary Chapin Carpenter, and Defense Secretary William Cohen: "The crew of this American aircraft carrier rained a torrent of bombs and missiles on Iraq. But today, standing amid idle warplanes, several thousand of them gathered on the sunny deck and crooned, `You make me feel like a natural woman.' Sheepishly at first, and then with increasing gusto, the warriors giddily followed the lead of musician Carole King.... On the USS Enterprise, [Cohen] danced with a Navy officer as King sang `Locomotion.' ... Television crews were barred from filming the event to avoid offending Kuwaiti religious feelings."

Jolly Holiday

An ad in the Hawaii Tribune-Herald: "Homelani Memorial Park is excited about the upcoming Holiday Season. We realize that family is important as most of us will gather for the Holidays with our loved ones and feel the importance of togetherness. Therefore, we are offering for a short time `Our Family Stays Together Program.' ... Exciting opportunities for loved ones and families of every size to stay together forever! Buy one lot--receive space for three. Buy two lots--receive space for five.... Buy five lots--receive space for twelve. Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!"

Artificial Intelligence

From an article in The Boston Globe: "A German couple out for a drive near Berlin ended up in a river, apparently because their luxury car's computer did not indicate they had to wait for a ferry.... The driver kept going straight, in the dark, expecting a bridge, and ended up in the water."

Killing 'em With Kindness

From The Washington Post: "The U.S.-operated Radio Free Iraq, broadcasting from Prague, begins its daily broadcasts into Iraq with: `Dear listeners, we hope that you are having a nice day, and that you enjoy our programs today.' It concludes: `Thank you for following us, and peace and blessings be upon you.'"

Poor Baby

From a "Persian Gulf Dispatch" in The New Republic by Romesh Ratnesar, commenting on the pent-up frustration of sailors on the Cape St. George missile cruiser, who had to wait months before bombing Iraq. "You could excuse the men on the cruiser for feeling cheated. They weren't just denied the bellicose thrill of watching their Tomahawks unleashed; they also missed their opportunity to feel productive.... It was the thirty-sixth birthday of Richard Meeher, a gunner's mate from Portsmouth, Ohio. `I thought I'd have a real nice birthday. It didn't happen,' he said."

Frontiers of P.R.

From an article in the St. Paul Pioneer Press on the recently resolved contract dispute between players and management in the National Basketball Association: "`If you look at people who play professional sports, not a lot of them are financially secure,' union president Patrick Ewing said. `They make a lot of money, but they also spend a lot of money. No matter how much money they've made throughout their careers, if they're in need now, it's up to us to try to help them.'"

Highway Bandits

From an article in The Wall Street Journal: "Anybody in the insurance industry could answer this one: An eighty-one-year-old woman steps in front of a big truck on a highway and gets killed. What happens next? A claim for damages, of course. But in this case, it isn't the woman's family that is seeking compensation. Instead, the trucker's insurance company [Great West Casualty Co.] is charging the elderly dead woman with negligence--and seeking damages from her estate. `I'm not paying them for killing my mom,' says Joyce Lang, the dead woman's daughter.... `How much damage can a five-foot, 105-pound woman do to a big truck like that?'"

Shades of History

From an article in The Wall Street Journal on the environmental group Project Underground, which quoted Ida Tarbell, the famous muckraking journalist, in a press release opposing the merger of Exxon and Mobil Oil companies: "The group ... identified Ms. Tarbell as one of its ex-officio oil campaigners and listed her as a public-relations contact. The only problem: Ms. Tarbell has been dead since 1944. That didn't stop Oil Daily, a trade newspaper based in Washington, D.C., from quoting Ms. Tarbell as a Project Underground representative.... A phone request by The Wall Street Journal to talk to Ms. Tarbell at Project Underground was met with a hesitant: `Oh, uh, she doesn't work here.' ... When pressed for details of her whereabouts, [the oil campaign director for the group] finally confessed, `Actually, she's dead.'"