NEWS LITE : GARCIA'S TRIP ON HOLY RIVER.

In a private goodbye to that most public of men, Jerry Garcia's widow sent his ashes swirling down the Ganges River on pieces of paper bearing farewells from members of his Grateful Dead band.

Deborah Koons Garcia and Bob Weir, a guitarist with the legendary band, waded into the swirling waters of India's holy river and released the ashes as dawn broke Thursday after a lunar eclipse.

The ceremony was held secretly near the holy city of Rishikesh on the upper Ganges because Deborah Garcia was afraid that if word leaked out, thousands of fans in the United States and Europe might have come to India and spoiled the private occasion, said Britain's The Independent newspaper.

The Rishikesh police force learned about the ceremony after Garcia, Weir and five other people conducted it.

Band members who stayed behind in California had written farewell messages to Garcia, and his widow and Weir poured some of his ashes on each message before setting it adrift in the currents, said the Independent, which first published the story Monday.

Garcia died Aug. 9 of a heart attack at age 53 at a Northern California drug rehabilitation center.

GOP party animals a bit

out-of-date

A video produced for the Republican National Committee Christmas party in December featured top GOP officials in skits parodying cocaine use and lewd behavior.

In one parody of a job interview, GOP convention manager Bill Greener asks a woman, played by a GOP staffer, ``What are your qualifications?'' He then gawks as she strips to flimsy lingerie.

``I'm an a-- man, but you still got the job,'' a smiling Greener says on the video. The skit was filmed in 1985 but was dusted off for the 1995 video.

Another decade-old clip shows Mary Matalin, George Bush's campaign political director in 1992, donning dark glasses as she pretends to snort a line of cocaine.

An announcer introduces the skit with a play on words involving Matalin's current job as co-host of CNBC's ``Equal Time'' political talk show.

``Long before Mary Matalin was doing `Equal Time,' she was more interested in doing equal lines,'' the announcer says.

The tape's disclosure comes at a sensitive time for the GOP, which is fending off a lawsuit that includes allegations from three female former employees that Republican National Committee headquarters in Washington is rife with lewd behavior, racism and gay-bashing.

The RNC is contesting the lawsuit allegations, and said the videotape, which was first aired by CNN, has no relevance to the suit.

``Ridiculing inappropriate behavior is the polar opposite of condoning it,'' the party said in a statement Monday.

``To suggest that old Christmas Party lampoon videos reflect reality at the RNC is like suggesting that reruns of skits from `Saturday Night Live' reflect the working atmosphere at NBC,'' it said.

Greener said someone else had scripted his scene back in 1985, and he did not object to doing it because everyone recognized it was satire and did not reflect the way he or other RNC officials really acted.

``The reality is, no offense was intended at the time, and in the 11 years since then, no one has ever expressed any offense,'' he said.

``I think what you see is one more indication of why what many people would consider would be innocent humor is now something that lots of people give a very serious look at,'' he said.

Matalin said her skit was done in 1984. ``I do recall those were in the days of `just say no.' That was obviously a spoof. You never saw a bunch of straighter people in your life,'' she said.

As for the Greener skit being resurrected in 1995, Matalin added: ``That was certainly cut in less PC (politically correct) days. I don't think anybody would do that today.''

RNC spokeswoman Mary Crawford said employees each year produce a lampoon tape for the annual Christmas party for staff at RNC headquarters.

How much `grafteroo?'

Can David Letterman be bought for a frozen enchilada?

Maybe.

Folks in Wahoo, Neb., hope so.

CBS-TV's ``Late Show'' host Letterman is counting up the bribes he's received from the town of Wahoo, which wants to replace Grand Rapids, Mich., as the home office for Letterman's Top 10 list.

``Grafteroo. That's what it's all about,'' said Late Show spokeswoman Donna Dees, ticking off the following bribes:

Letterman gets a full golf membership to the Hilltop Country Club.

Free meals for everyone on Letterman's staff at the Wahoo Hardee's.

T-shirts with ``WA'' on the front and ``HOO'' on the back.

An admiralship in the Great Nebraska Navy for Dave.

Some frozen enchiladas.

Nebraska isn't necessarily known for enchiladas. Has Dees sampled them?

``I have not,'' she said.

Was Dave especially delighted with the enchiladas, or any of the other bribes from Wahoo?

She couldn't say.

What would it take to force Letterman to drop Grand Rapids like a rock?

``Grafteroo,'' she said.

From Grand Rapids, Letterman has received a fax listing the top 10 reasons the home office should remain there, Dees said. And what were they?

Dees didn't have the fax handy.

The gag began after Letterman commented about how much he liked to say the word ``wahoo,'' and the Wahoo Chamber of Commerce and Gov. Ben Nelson started urging the relocation to Wahoo.

SOURCE: Compiled by Karen Duffy from Daily News staff and wire reports.

CAPTION(S):

2 Photos

Photo: (1) David Letterman: Wahoo calls

(2) Fans play ba ll!

Dodgers outfielder Brett Butler gives the fans back their beach ball Monday at Dodger Stadium.

Tina Gerson/Daily News