NAME OF THE GAME IT'S TIME FOR THE USC-UCLA GAME TO TAKE ON A RALLY CALL - A CLEVER MONIKER THAT HELPS DISTINGUISH IT FROM THE OTHER GREAT COLLEGE FOOTBALL RIVALRIES.

Byline: TOM HOFFARTH

It's a game without a name, a series without a slogan, a tradition in need of a rhetorician and alliteration.

We all know by now that the annual football game between UCLA and USC is more than just another backyard brawl. It's a historic, family-friendly rivalry renewed each season to determine bragging rights around Southern California, no matter the rankings, bowl implications or incarcerated alums.

So why, if Los Angeles is a company town where name-dropping is the norm, doesn't this quintessential quarrel have a nickname after all these years?

Part of the revelry of a rivalry is having some kind of rally call, a kitschy catch-phrase, something with class and crass, a marketing moniker to manipulate the masses into believing this is the be-all and end-all.

``Battle for L.A.'' might be simple and sweet, but that'll only get you so far, right?

``I only have known this game as the 'City Championship,' never having a glitzy name,'' said David Carter, a USC grad (married to a UCLA grad) who heads The Sports Business Group in Redondo Beach and teaches a sports marketing class at USC.

``If you could come up with something to sell a few T-shirts, great, it can't hurt. But it's UCLA and USC ... you don't need one. This is a game that speaks for itself. Some of the best marketing campaigns have very little verbiage attached to it. It doesn't need anything campy that might cheapen it. If it's too contrived, people won't care.

``On the other hand, a hat I find interesting is that it's pretty sorry we here in Southern California can't be as creative as they are at Cal and Stanford and call it the 'Big Game.' If that's the best they can do, they should be going back to junior high.''

If it sounds like Carter is throwing down the Lexus Gauntlet to the Bay Area buffoons, that's another issue.

No matter what sponsorship wants to attach itself like a barnacle to a game, it's usually not gonna fly, either. A well-known communications company offered Michigan and Ohio State a whopping $500,000 apiece if it could slap its logo onto that rivalry game for two years and call it the ``(Company Name) Classic.'' Three days after the deal was announced, the schools called it off and gave the money back because of all the negative reaction.

So, despite Carter's warning not to mess with something already perfect, if we were employed to put our heads together and find just the right slipshod slogan, what would be the strategy?

``There are a lot of different approaches, and no single method is a sure recipe for success,'' said Randy Satterburg, a UCLA grad who is a sports marketing manager for a major communications firm based in Los Angeles. ``The classic approach begins with doing background research, identifying a target market, assessing what that group currently feels about the situation and what you want them to feel instead.

``After brainstorming with good creative people, hopefully that leads you to a `sweet spot' selling proposition that satisfies the unmet need of the target group.

``Sometimes the perfect idea just hits you and you run with it on a hunch. Or, if you're a USC grad, you just copy someone else's idea and call it your own.''

So after mixing metaphors, twisting trademarks and throwing darts at a thesaurus, do any of these candidates grab you?

``The `Wood vs. the `Hood'': Captures the essence of the surroundings of the two campuses in an urban, hip-hop vernacular that's sure to be a hit with out-of-touch alums.

``The Seismic Showdown'': Or ``The Angeleno Divide.'' Plays off the fact that, here in earthquake country, the city is divided by off-the-Richter Scale excitement.

``The Silicone Bowl'': Not to be confused with the Silicon Bowl in the computer-chip region of the state that jumps for joy by playing host to two teams that barely made it to six-win seasons, but in honor of the nip/tuck work that keeps the city dwellers lookin' fresh.

``Surf `n' Turf Showtime'': Sounds more like what they serve at Staples Center's dining room before a Lakers game. Spinoffs of this one include ``The Pacific Punchout,'' ``L.A. Beach Bash'' or the ``Motion by the Ocean,'' which may imply it's more of a surfing contest.

``The Gridlock Gridiron Gauntlet'': Takes the existing sponsorship concept and inserts a reality check for those who've had to navigate Interstate 10.

``The Subway Series Presented by Jared'': Takes the existing sponsorship concept off the board.

``The L.A. Story'': First, the movie with Steve Martin. Now a football game.

``The La-La Land Extravaganza'': A little too West Hollywood.

``The Hollywood Hoe-Down'': Think ``Mystic River'' meets ``River Dance.''

``The Blood Bowl'': It's good enough for the annual scuffle between the Daily Bruin and Daily Trojan newspaper staffs.

``Hell's Bells for the Victory Bell'': Gives credence to the object that is actually presented to the game's winner, and it's different than ``Battle for the Bell,'' which is what Marshall and Ohio University use.

``The Bigger Game'': Just to annoy Northern California.

CAPTION(S):

2 photos, 2 boxes

Photo:

(1 -- color) Fans of the USC-UCLA showdown might enjoy it even more if the annual rivalry game had a nickname.

(2) The annual rivalry game between USC and UCLA is one of the few ``big games'' not to have a nickname.

Tina Burch/Staff Photographer

Box:

(1) No. 1 USC at UCLA

(2) GREAT RIVALRY NICKNAMES