Mind over matter: getting a grip on stress.

First there was the uncertainty about which sales staff would be laid off. Then the new manager increased her sales quotas significantly. Finally her territory has been changed four times since the buyout.

Jennifer has lost weight, has trouble sleeping, is anxious most of the time, and finds herself depressed on Sunday afternoons by the very thought of a new work week looming the next day. For Jennifer, stress is taking a toll on her quality of life.

In our culture, stress seems to be a fact of life. It's prevalent, pervasive, and persistent. Although we may not immediately recognize it, stress contributes to hypertension, strokes, heart attacks, diabetes, ulcers, and neck and back pain. Left unchallenged, stress can kill.

Yet stress can be relieved and reduced, even for people like Jennifer. Here are some time-tested, real-world stress busters that actually work. Chances are very good that they'll work for you.

Tell Yourself It's All Small Stuff

That wisdom comes from the personal experience of Robert S. Eliot, M.D., director of the Institute of Stress Medicine in Denver, Colorado. At the age of 44, Robert found himself enduring a heart attack. This surprised him, because he was a cardiologist--someone skilled in the detection and prevention of just such a disease. Also, he had a good family history, didn't smoke, had neither diabetes nor high cholesterol, wasn't overweight, nor had he ever been told he had high blood pressure. His colleagues described him as a classic Type-B personality: calm, cool, and collected.

"That was on the outside," he then admitted. "On the inside, however, my own physical reactions to stress were killing me."

While experiencing the heart attack in a hospital bathroom, he sensed immediately how much stress he'd been under. It had been a hectic week, with hospital rounds early each morning, participation in a cardiology conference, unsuccessful arguments in meetings with hospital administrators over budget and staff issues, and an exhausting lecture series in another city.

During his subsequent recovery, he took inventory of his life.

"Something had to change, and I asked myself, 'Is any of this worth dying for?' Fortunately for me, my answer was 'no!' I had looked into the abyss and decided to stop sweating the small stuff. Pretty soon, I saw that it was all small stuff."

Like Dr. Eliot, we absorb far too much stress because we permit situations and people to tax our nervous systems. Don't take everything and everyone so seriously. Tell yourself it's all small stuff. That was the point Jesus was trying to make when He said, "Consider how the lilies grow.

They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith" (Luke 12:27-28)!

Try Laughing

When stressed out, it's hard to laugh. Yet when we train ourselves to see the comedic in our lives, we can laugh, and the laughter is both healing and stress reducing.

Consider this example from Linda Richman, who is the mother-in-law of actor Mike Myers. During one 14-year period in her life, Richman moved 11 times. While any move is stressful, one particular journey stands out. Richman had relocated from Tucson, Arizona, to Miami, Florida. She was in her apartment when the movers began bringing in her belongings. That was when Richman noticed that something wasn't quite right.

"That's not my furniture," she told the mover.

"Yes it is," he answered gruffly. "The boxes are marked."

Richmond shook her head. "I'm telling you, it's not my furniture."

Incredibly, the mover repeated, "Yes it is. The boxes are marked."

Refusing to double-check or call his office, he continued bringing in carton after carton "of stuff I'd never seen before," Linda remembers.

Her stress level was rising dangerously when she had a brilliant idea.

"Calm down," she told herself. "Let the other people go crazy. Then the movers will have to come back, carry out this stuff, and bring in mine." So she sat down on her "new" couch, put her feet up on her "new" ottoman, and watched the workers unload the truck, delivering an entire apartment's worth of the wrong furniture.

Next, Richman called her sister who lived nearby and invited her over. She stayed three days, enjoying the furniture with her sibling. On the third day, the moving company owner called, frantically informed her that they'd made a mistake, and quickly delivered her furniture after speedily removing the wrong furniture.

Meditate on Scriptures

Various studies show that meditation is a stress reliever. When you're feeling overwhelmed and the emotional wails are closing in on you, meditate on various passages from the Bible. Place your focus on those scriptures that highlight God's unwavering faithfulness. Meditating on these types of biblical verses will focus your mind on the reality of God's goodness, God's love, and God's guidance. This will help stabilize your feelings and generate calm.

Gain Perspective Jonathan is the principal of a large high school in a low-income neighborhood. "My days are often hectic; racing from one crisis to another," he says. "When I get really stressed out I ask myself:

'How bad is this, really? Did somebody die?' If the answer is 'no,' then I ask myself, 'Is someone deathly ill?' Again, if the answer is 'no,' then I remind myself, 'I'll get over this.'

Those kinds of questions always put everyday stress into perspective for me."

Humanize Your Environment

Take steps that allow you to break through role boundaries in order to establish deeper human contact.

Often our lives are stressful because we feel disengaged and disconnected from others. Humanize your work environment by encouraging your colleagues to take time out to celebrate accomplishments. Go out for a coworker's birthday. Throw a retirement party for a colleague.

Also, humanize your business encounters. Address your neighborhood pharmacist by name. Ask about his pets. If you learn that your bank teller's mother had surgery, be sure to ask how she's doing the next time you're at the window. By pushing yourself beyond traditional role boundaries, your human contacts will be deeper, more satisfying, and less stressful.

Move From Evaluation to Action

Participate in your own stress rescue. Far too many people sit around waiting for someone else to rescue them or relieve them of their stress.

When the source of your stress is clearly identifiable, take specific action to remedy the situation. Be a person who moves from evaluation to action.

Here's a good example. Pam was a high school athlete participating on her school's basketball, volleyball, and track teams. However, shortly after graduating from college she reached an all-time high weight of 270 pounds and wore size 24 clothes. Her weight was a constant source of stress, yet for a year she did nothing about it. It was a doctor's checkup that motivated her to make changes. "During the medical exam, I learned that my blood pressure was in the dangerously high category."

She returned home, went online, and researched the basics of healthful weight loss. That included consuming fewer calories, eating nutritious foods, and starting an exercise program. A year and a half later, Pam was 95 pounds lighter, and her blood pressure had returned to a normal range.

Cultivate Solitude

Spend time alone. This doesn't need to be lengthy and can be done in the form of prayer, meditation, or a solitary walk. "Solitude helps you restore balance," notes Barbara J. Braham, in her book Managing Stress: Keeping Calm Under Fire. She says that through solitude you can learn to create a place of quiet within you that you can access wherever you need it. You can literally let go of the pressures of the moment and retreat to your inner place where you can think through what you need to do. As you spend time alone with yourself, you come to know yourself better. You begin to differ entiate between what you want and need and what someone else wants or expects you to do. You gain greater control over your own life through clarifying what you value.

By reducing stress in your life you will be in a healthier and stronger position to build a relationship with God and help others who need your friendship, guidance, and kindness.

Also, by taking care of yourself you will be more efficient, effective, and energized. Every day, when you awaken, you'll feel the joy that comes with realizing that life is an incredible gift for those who choose to live it wisely.

Pastor and author Victor M. Parachin writes from Tulsa, Oklahoma.