MAYOR OF TELEVISION BLOG.

Byline: >DAVID KRONKE

Next on 'Today': The Dead Parrot Sketch!

NBC's "Today" show announced recently that its correspondents will traverse the Earth, traveling pole to pole, 'round the equator, and everywhere in between for a week of global high-jinks beginning Nov. 5.

Hasn't Monty Python alum Michael Palin already done this -- and numerous times?

Of course, NBC has found a different peg: its "green" initiative. (How better to conserve our natural resources than to fly correspondents all over the planet -- not in search of actual news stories but just to be able to say you did?)

Perhaps if we absorb the NBC publicity machine's take on it, we'll form another opinion. So here goes (some of the duller bits have been excised):

"In an historic broadcast first, NBC News' 'Today' is taking an unprecedented look at our home, Planet Earth. 'Today' anchors will be dispatched -- literally -- to the ends of the earth to explore the extraordinary diversity of life on this planet -- the climate extremes, the wildlife, and the limits of human exploration. This trip will culminate in the first live simultaneous broadcast in history from the top and bottom of the globe.

"Never before has a television network linked locations live around the entire circumference of the planet in a single ground-breaking program. 'Today' anchors will embark on a grueling trek to extreme destinations: Matt Lauer will travel to the very top of the globe, the Arctic (editor's note: Thanks for the clarification!), and broadcast from remote locations on the Greenland ice sheet; Ann Curry will travel to the very bottom of the globe, Antarctica (editor's very same note: Thanks for the clarification!), and broadcast from extreme locations, including the McMurdo Research Station located at the southern end of 'The Ice'; Al Roker will travel to the equator and broadcast from the middle of an endangered cloud forest in Mindo, Ecuador, 7,000 feet above sea level; Meredith Vieira will connect the global dots from 'Today's' home base in New York, where she will take a look at how the global issues at these unique locations are affecting people across the United States."

Hey, the Discovery Channel won a bunch of Emmys with its "Planet Earth" miniseries, so why not?

The big question is: How did they decide who'd go where? Was someone rewarded? Was someone punished? Did Vieira draw the short straw and get forced to stay home?

And what the hell is an "endangered cloud forest"? Are clouds endangered? If one cloud scuds into another in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? If someone is there to hear it, does it make a sound ?

Read more David Kronke at the Mayor of Television blog, http://insidesocal.com/tv