Learning the language of interfaith dialogue*: the Religious Life Council at Princeton University.

How can you pray, if not to God? a student asked me.

I was stunned, never having considered the question.

Do you believe in God? they wondered.

I, the sole Buddhist student on the Princeton Religious Life Council, had no single word in my vocabulary to describe the limitless, the incomprehensible, the divine.

A circle of sixteen students--Sikh, Muslim, Baha'i, Jewish, and Christian--sat waiting for my response. I tried to explain that it depends on what you mean by God, that everything--and nothing--describes the infinite, that words inevitably befuddle and confuse. Language, I found, was the perfect metaphor:

     Two people look at the same tree, one calls it un roble and the
     other calls it an oak. There are as many different perceptions of
     reality as there are leaves on a tree--but the branches are
     covered in leaves, no matter what you call them. Just as language
     offers us a way of expressing our experiences, religion shapes the
     experiences themselves. Different languages clearly have different
     vocabularies, but they express the same thing.

The group, drinking cups of tea, listened attentively. For some, this idea was unsettling: "If all religions are leading to the same place, why am I practicing my religion and not yours?" one student asked.

We launched into another debate, drawing from our shared experiences of the week-long 2003 Intercession Retreat at the Toronto Zen Center. For five days, members of the Religious Life Council (the RLC) had been attending meditation, prayers, and talks with religious leaders of the Christian, Buddhist, Sikh, Jewish, and Muslim traditions. The metaphor of trees extended to pathways, which in turn was drawn out to teams ascending mountain peaks.

"I think of all religions as different paths up the same mountain, leading to one peak," offered one student in the group, "and followers of each religion, of each path, are members of a team climbing to the top."

"We're all from the same source," another affirmed. "It makes little difference which path you follow; you only need to follow the one that is right for you."

"But that idea is troubling to me," a student responded. "I believe that mine is the exemplary path. How can I accept that there is little difference between paths if this is a tenet of my faith?"

As the conversation intensified, people continued to discuss and reiterate their ideas. Some felt that their path was more adequate than others, but the group seemed to agree that we were, indeed, like teams ascending the same mountain. But then, after a silence, one of the quieter members of the group spoke. "What if I think you're on the wrong mountain?"

Among the Religious Life Council fellows, we had assembled a group that included students majoring in computer science, politics, anthropology, biology, history, psychology, economics, public policy, comparative literature, and religion. If a metaphor worked perfectly for some, it was bound to be worthless for others. Yet during the retreat, students convened on the basis of their religious ideals and core values--a complete reversal from the more rationalized manner of communication that we know so well at school.

During these conversations, as students reflected on their experiences with Zen meditation, listening to the reading of the Torah, sharing a vegetarian langar with Sikh community members, and watching our Muslim friends in prayer, members of the Religious Life Council unconsciously embodied the RLC Mission Statement that was articulated when the group first formed in 2001:

     To deepen understanding and cultivate respect among religious
     faiths; To weave connections between intellectual life and
     spiritual growth; To widen the conversation on critical moral and
     ethical issues of the day; To provide visibility for the strength
     and diversity of religious life on Princeton campus.

While interfaith dialogue did exist on campus before 2001, Princeton lacked a well-organized, cohesive program. This changed when an anonymous donor approached the Office of Religious Life (the ORL) with a desire to contribute to a new initiative. After a great deal of planning, the Religious Life Council was founded as a program of the ORL, finding an original, creative way to show the donor's love of God. Consequently, the Office of Religious Life has taken on a more active role in supporting numerous religions at Princeton. Located in Murray Dodge Hall at the center of Princeton's campus, the ORL is most commonly known as the home of Christian ministers, administrators, and many Christian student groups. The building also houses the Muslim Students Association, however, and now an Interfaith Prayer Room that is used by members of the RLC for meditation, prayer, ceremonies, discussion, and quiet reflection.

When I first applied for the council in the fall of 2001, towards the end of its first year, the RLC consisted of about fifteen students who met twice a month. Today we are a group of about twenty-five students, including Baha'i, Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jewish, Sikh, Unitarian Universalist, and Zoroastrian members; we meet once a week. This article will describe the Religious Life Council's formation and application process, the expansion of our Intersession Retreat model, our weekly meetings, and basic principles that we have learned from our experiences with interfaith dialogue.

Joining the Religious Life Council

In order to form a viable, cohesive council, members of the RLC must have an enthusiasm to work with others of different faiths, a motivation to initiate programs and collaborate with the administration and, of great importance, diverse religious backgrounds and life experiences. While most people apply for the RLC after having attended open meetings, participated in conversations, or because they know members who are excited about the group, I learned about the Religious Life Council through a complete coincidence--I mistakenly clicked on the "Chapel" link of the Princeton University web site my freshman year, and found an application posted for an interfaith group. While I knew nothing of the group and suspected that it consisted almost exclusively of Christians and perhaps a few Jewish students, I decided to submit an application. I explained two words that were important in my tradition, including the Buddhist concept of compassion, and wrote about my religious background and my familiarity with faiths other than my own, described some ideas for new interfaith projects, and clicked send. After an invitation to join the council and confirmation of my attendance at the 2002 Intersession Retreat, I still had no idea that the group included religions that I didn't even know existed.

Today, the application process consists of several essay questions and a discussion with three student coordinators of the group, known as Co-Conveners, and our faculty advisor, the Associate Dean of Religious Life. We admit new members during the fall term. At this time, we make a concerted effort to publicize the group and advertise through emails to student groups, campus newspaper ads, our web site, and an informational Open House. We strive to reach out to all religious groups on campus, including those not currently represented on the council. Inevitably, many interested students come through word of mouth, the most successful means of recruitment. Every year, more students apply than we have space for--because dialogue is a central part of our group, we try to maintain our size between twenty and twenty-five members. Since our meetings are limited to an hour and a half, too many people can inhibit dialogue, whereas too few people would limit the diversity of opinions expressed. Ultimately, we try to maintain a balance of representation so that no one religion overwhelms the group.

Those who join the council do not need to be experts, but do express a firm commitment to their own religious traditions. Some have rarely been exposed to practitioners of another faith while others come from interfaith families. Agnostics or those without an organized religious practice are not discouraged from applying; one of our most active participants in the group was a member who declared himself "open to all." Most importantly, members of the council show the initiative and enthusiasm to build an interfaith community on campus. Furthermore, members show a willingness for dialogue--to question and to be questioned. We cannot learn if we don't ask questions of others, and accept that others will question us.

Spiritual Autobiographies and Growth of Retreat

Every year since the council was formed, we have held an RLC Retreat during Intersession, the last week of January between first and second semesters when students ideally have no academic commitments. The retreat is the first RLC activity to incorporate new members, and Spiritual Autobiographies are members' first introduction to one another. To prepare for their Spiritual Autobiographies, students are prompted to bring and share one word, object, or experience that will help others understand them spiritually or religiously.

Many students describe the relationship between their religious practice and their family background; some explain why they have become more observant, and others less observant than their parents. A Shabbat candle, a Baha'i ring, a Catholic rosary, meditation cushions, a necklace with the Star of David, prayer beads, a coin stamped with a Zoroastrian emblem, a clock: all are objects that have been described and shared with the group. One year, our group leader brought simply the word: Attention. One RLC member described the impact of a parent's experience in the Holocaust; another explained his conversion to his present faith; another spoke of his struggle to overcome a physical disability. As students return each year, different experiences, objects, or words are shared that deepen our understanding of one another.

Growth of the retreat has mirrored the growth of our council and our expanding vision since our formation four years ago. Our retreat had its beginnings as a 3-day weekend in the rural mountains of Pennsylvania. During the first two years this was an optional yet encouraged event, and the retreat was attended by under half the group. The main focus of this style retreat was reflective and internal; the sharing of members' Spiritual Autobiographies was the central activity during the weekend. However, some of us grew restless just talking--we wanted to do something. As the council expanded and intensified, moving from meeting twice a month to every week and sponsoring a wide range of activities, we took on a more ambitious plan in 2003, when we planned a weeklong trip to Toronto; a similar model was followed in 2004 in Washington, D.C.

This new model is characterized by experiential leaning. In addition to the Spiritual Autobiographies, students coordinate site visits to temples and places of worship and organize prayers, meditation, and meetings with religious leaders. In Toronto we stayed at a Zen Buddhist center and visited an Orthodox Jewish synagogue, a Sikh gurdwara, a Russian Orthodox church, an Anglican Byzantine church, a Muslim mosque, and met with a professor specializing in Interfaith Dialogue at the University of Toronto. In Washington, D.C. we visited a Vedanta Hindu center, the Freer Gallery's collection of Buddhist art, a Baha'i center, the Religious Action Center of Reform Judaism, St. Anselm's Abbey, a Mormon temple, a Muslim mosque, and we met with the U.S. Senate Chaplain and New Jersey Congressman Rush Holt as well as spending an afternoon in service at a homeless shelter.

The student coordinator for each site visit acts as a resource for other members of the RLC, explaining the program they have prepared and responding to questions. In Washington, D.C. the Baha'i Center arranged a panel discussion; we entered the chapel for evening prayers at St. Anselm's Abbey, discussed sections from the Bible at the Religious Action Center, and met with the leaders of the Vedanta Hindu Center for an introduction to their faith. In combination with daily visits, there is time at the end of each day for reflection, conversation, questions and debriefing on the day's experiences.

To ensure that all members are able to participate fully and feel unthreatened by the diversity of unfamiliar experiences during the retreat, several guidelines are established. A Code of Conduct elaborating the standards for open interfaith dialogue and considerate interactions applies during the retreat. For greater inclusiveness of the different religious traditions we represent, all meals served are vegetarian, and no alcohol is consumed. Furthermore, we hold mandatory informational meetings and supply reading material before the retreat to address issues of protocol and respect that could surface during these site visits.

Despite all prior preparation, however, students inevitably feel discomfort at times, or unexpectedly encounter barriers to participation imposed by their own religions. Often these moments of uneasiness become the topic of late night discussion. Moved by the ceremony at the Sikh gurdwara that we visited in Toronto, one member of the group wanted to fully engage in the experience and bow before the Sikh holy book as other students did, but felt unable to. "I wanted to participate," she told the group later that evening, "but my religion prevented me."

When people join the council and prepare for the retreat, they expect to learn about other faiths and teach people about themselves. They are inevitably surprised that throughout the process, they are motivated to strengthen their own commitment to religious practice. "When I came on the retreat I knew that I would learn about other religions," reflected one member at the conclusion of our week in Toronto, "but I didn't expect to deepen my own relationship with God."

Weekly Meetings

When we return to campus, the energy and drive generated from the retreat is focused into our weekly meetings and public events. Every Monday night, the RLC fellows gather together to discuss a specific topic in the East Room of Princeton's Murray Dodge Hall. We transform that space, a relatively sterile meeting room, into a sacred space with candles, tablecloths, a delicious supper and most importantly, passionate and honest conversation. The evening's topic is chosen in advance by the RLC Co-Conveners and circulated to RLC fellows via email so we have a chance to prepare our thoughts and seek out relevant texts, stories and materials. Past topics have included Sin, Conversion, Sexuality, Creation Stories, Angels and Spirits, the Death Penalty, and Social Action.

Sometimes our meetings are open to the full Princeton University community and we advertise the meeting and topic in advance in the campus press. The goal of these open meetings is to stimulate conversation in the broader campus community and to bring an even more diverse group to our table. Often, we hold these meeting in campus dining halls in the residential colleges. Our closed meetings, however, are equally important because in them we are most able to deeply, thoroughly, and honestly discuss a topic. Among our trusting community of friends it is easier to express opinions that may be controversial, or feelings that are intensely personal. We discuss critical and important issues that often take us to sensitive places; our feelings about them are drawn from the core of our identities as religious people. We must have as much compassion as candor in our dialogues. Together, the two allow us to create a truly unique venue for discussion and debate on campus.

Out of our weekly conversations flow a variety of community events that build on the issues we discuss in our Monday meetings. They include a film series devoted to films that raise ethical questions about religion; a series of concerts of sacred music; a conference of college interfaith councils; an interfaith day of community service; an interfaith Peace Seder; an annual dinner for the student-leaders of all the University's religious groups; and finally, interfaith study breaks.

One of our most popular events is the "What Matters to Me and Why" lecture series, where we invite a campus personality to speak about what exactly matters to them most, and why. Past speakers have included Princeton University President Shirley Tilghman, the Dean of Admissions, and psychology professor Daniel Kahneman a year before he received the Nobel Prize. The talks attract a wide and diverse audience and almost always touch on the most important questions of faith and ethics and meaning.

Conversations with the RLC

Let me bring you into a conversation held with the RLC. It was the end of November, when we host an annual Interfaith Thanksgiving meal open to the wider Princeton community. The East Room of Murray Dodge Hall was filling up with old and new members of the RLC, their friends and roommates, and other interested students, administrators, staff, and community members. Each year as we sit down to a feast of vegetarian Indian food, everyone around the table is asked to introduce themselves. Then, as people eat, they are invited to share prayers of Thanksgiving; once the prayers have been completed everyone is asked to contribute thoughts of what they are grateful for at this time.

Different students from the Religious Life Council stood up and volunteered their prayers:

     "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; For his lovingkindness
     endures forever ... Let them that revere the Lord say: His
     Lovingkindness endures forever," read a Jewish student from
     Psalm 118.

There was momentary silence.

     "He is God!" read a Baha'i member of the RLC from the words of
     'Abdu'l-Baha. "How can we render Thee thanks, O Lord? Thy
     bounties are endless and our gratitude cannot equal them. How can
     the finite utter praise to the Infinite?"

     "And Allah has brought you forth from the wombs of your mothers,"
     read a Muslim student from the Qu'ran, "you did not know
     anything--and He gave you hearing and sight and hearts that you
     may give thanks."

     "So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to
     live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the
     faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness,"
     read a Christian student from the Colossians.

A Mormon student then stood up and sang a verse from "Count Your Blessings," his surprisingly sweet voice filling the room:

     "When upon life's billows you are tempest tossed,
     When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
     Count your many blessings; name them one by one,
     And it will surprise what the Lord has done."

As student after student stood up in a silent room and read or sang expressions of Thanksgiving from their faith, it was difficult to recall specific words. The atmosphere, however, was not of people talking about their religion--they were sharing directly the words and prayers that were part of their daily lives, before a group of people unfamiliar with their words.

One Catholic student brought a bedtime prayer of thanksgiving that he had known since he was a child to share with the group:

     "Good night God and thank you for this very lovely day
     Thank you too for helping us at work and at our play
     Thank you for our family, for each and every friend.
     Forgive us please for anything we've done that might offend.

     Keep us safe and happy God.
     Tell us what to do.
     Good night God, and thank you God, for letting us love you."

Once the prayers had been shared, people began to speak about what they were thankful for in their lives. People described thankfulness for personal changes and challenges, thankfulness for the multitude of choices that we are able to make, gratitude that we do not go hungry, thankfulness for the love of friends and family, the natural world, gratitude for the incredible opportunity to exist in the here and now. One student reflected on her gratitude for the RLC: "When I began to think about who I wanted to invite to this dinner," she said, "I realized that so many of those people were already here," as members of the RLC.

Through all of these community events, ceremonies, and discussions, RLC members both open their own traditions to share with others, and resolve to participate in previously foreign activities. During the Interfaith Seder in the spring, there is a pause in the traditional service to allow people to speak about freedom and the meaning of slavery in their different religions, for example. During a gospel choir concert sponsored by the Religious Life Council's concert series, the Festival of Faiths, diverse members of the RLC were dancing and clapping in the auditorium as singers gave thanks for the Lord.

However, this is clearly not a council where we all agree. In fact, many of the most passionate disagreements come from practitioners of the same religion with slightly varying views. In the past while we were sponsoring a movie series, controversy over programming would often arise. Some people objected to certain movies being shown, arguing that they were offensive or inaccurately portrayed their faith; others countered that this was a perfect opportunity to show the movie and encourage dialogue about why the film expressed prejudiced or inaccurate views. Throughout the year, we eventually decided to show more objective--though still provocative--documentary films, including "The Day My God Died," a documentary about sex trafficking in Nepal and India that was followed by a discussion with the producer. In the wake of 9/11 and widespread misunderstanding concerning the use of turbans, we showed the documentary "Who Are the Sikhs" and sponsored a discussion.

At the beginning of the war in Afghanistan, there was a motion within the group to place an advertisement supporting peace in the campus newspaper on behalf of the RLC. Some members of the council, however, felt uncomfortable with the implications of such a public statement, arguing that it could be construed as a declaration of political opinion. Since we are committed to supporting a diversity of opinions within the council, we reached a compromise by compiling an interfaith peace poem that included quotes from various religions. In further meetings throughout the year we discussed our personal and religious views of justice and war, elucidating the reasons for our reactions. A stanza of the peace poem read

     If you desire with all your heart
     Friendship with every race on earth ... it will become the desire
     of others,
     Growing stronger until it reaches the minds of all.
     Blessed are the peacemakers,
     For they shall be called children of God.

Now several years later, we continue to elaborate on the same theme: a recent RLC discussion focused on finding peace in times of stress. From drinking Sleepytime[TM] Tea to thinking of ideas in the shower, to jotting down thoughts in the back of a notebook, to setting aside time each day for meditation and prayer, people discussed both their practical and secular traditions as well as theological ideas. Excited by the conversation, members' additional thoughts, responses, and prayers trailed from the meeting into email discussions over our list serve, RLC-Talk.

Despite all of our conversations and discussions, there are times when words no longer suffice to describe our experiences. During a "What Matters to Me and Why" several years ago, one visiting professor of Judaic Studies discussed the influence of her grandfather, who had been a rabbi, on her life. She recounted a story:

     "How do you pray for everyone who comes before you, how do you
     remember it all?" someone once asked her grandfather.

     "Every time someone comes to tell me of their sorrows, I open my
     heart and it creates a scar," her grandfather had responded.
     "When I kneel down to pray before God, I open my heart to God and
     I say, 'God, see these scars ...'"

Listeners in the room seemed to absorb the vivid image of the rabbi, opening his scarred heart to God as a silent testament to his empathy, his compassion, and his sorrow. Her response to "What Matters to Me and Why" described more than the importance of family, it offered an answer to the question: how does one confront so much pain and suffering in the world? At times there are more words and details than the mind can hold. As Rabia Ali describes,

     "An RLC discussion is not just a discussion, it is an experience
     that its members go through together, where they learn from each
     other; they argue, they disagree, they get confused, and
     sometimes confuse each other, where they relive their
     uncertainties about their own belief and views, and fall silent
     when they honestly admit that they do not have the answers to the
     questions others ask them."

Throughout this dynamic process of explaining, clarifying, agreeing, disagreeing, and questioning one another, members of the RLC continue to teach one another a great deal from our interactions and experiences on the council--even when we refrain from speech.

Teachings

As we have learned through our Spiritual Autobiographies, students approach the RLC from a variety of backgrounds and go from one direction to another throughout the years. While a few people's religious communities are skeptical of their involvement with the RLC, others are highly encouraged to spend time with people of different faiths. Many begin secure in their faith, and find over the course of time that they have begun to question or doubt their previous beliefs; some become more steadfastly religious during their time on the council. Often, individual's doubts and questions ultimately confirm their faith. Everyone has fluctuations, both over the years and over the course of a single conversation or week; what each individual learns from their experiences with the RLC varies dramatically.

Through our experiences on the RLC we have learned to seek balance both as individuals, and as a group. Initially we had a stronger emphasis on internal conversations as we defined our group and our purpose, while we have increased our outreach activities in recent years. We work to balance our schedule--with too many events attendance drops, with too few we lose visibility and inertia. Reaching this equilibrium is difficult however, and at times we have veered to both extremes.

Despite the obstacles, the RLC has taught us to balance intellectual life at Princeton with spiritual growth. "Religion has the burden of being perceived as a dogmatic, irrational undertaking in a setting where the emphasis is on reason," RLC member Ritu Kamal explains. In such an intellectual environment, "it is difficult to explain your faith to others, or even see the reason to do so." To encourage people to delve into non-rational matters of faith without feeling intimidated, we seek to balance open meetings and programs for community members with regular closed meetings that allow the council members to reconnect and discuss more personal issues. Most importantly, we have learned to balance experiences with conversations: without time to reflect, too many activities would be overwhelming; dialogue without a basis in experience becomes contrived.

Beyond learning of the existence of several smaller religions that many of us were unaware of, like Zoroastrianism and the Baha'i Faith, we have now learned to empathize and share our experiences with others who may never have the opportunity to eat a meal at a Sikh gurdwara, participate in meditation at a Zen Buddhist center, or attend prayers at a Muslim mosque--or even a Jewish synagogue or a Catholic abbey. We have realized that without being open to questioning, and willing to respond truthfully, we would be unable to learn from one another.

While we question and learn about diverse religions, the Religious Life Council has become a forum for strengthening minority faiths on campus. For several members representing religions without strong support systems on campus--Baha'i, Zoroastrian, Hindu, Buddhist, and Sikh, for example--the Religious Life Council has become our spiritual community at Princeton. Once we realized that we were in a similar situation in 2003, the Baha'i member; the Sikh member and I began to meet weekly for meditation and prayers, each supporting one another in our individual religious practice. Due in large part to support from the RLC, there is now a Buddhist group on campus, and the Hindu group has been revitalized.

We have learned that we can commend and admire aspects of other religions without compromising our commitment to our own faith. During the 2004 retreat in Washington, D.C., a Mormon student introduced the concept of holy envy to describe the sensation of learning about a tradition, practice, or concept in another's religion that you wish you had in your own faith: singing gospels, for instance, or eating latkes. Throughout the retreat people would comment when they felt a moment of "holy envy" as we visited different sites and met with religious leaders.

The Religious Life Council has demonstrated the necessity of expanding the conception of "interfaith" dialogue in America beyond Judeo-Christian interactions, with an occasional Muslim contribution. When we visited Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C., we realized that religious diversity at the U.S. House and Senate consisted of various denominations of Protestant Christianity with some Catholics, and "a few Jews, like sprinklings on a cupcake," one Jewish RLC member observed ironically. Where was the religious diversity that we were exposed to on the RLC, and in temples throughout the city of Washington? Where were the Hindus, the Muslims, the Buddhists and the Baha'is? Where were the Sikhs? These are questions that many of us would not have asked before joining the RLC.

Through our experience we have learned to approach one another as individuals not only representing, but also wrestling with our faith. With this attitude our discussions can go beyond pleasant and mutually inclusive topics, or metaphorical discoveries. One member of the council, Nick Kessides, described a spontaneous conversation that arose during a retreat when "students shared aspects of their faith that have caused them to feel grief or shame. Christians and Muslims spoke of violence, and Hindus spoke of the caste system," he recalled. In another conversation about the meaning of forgiveness, "Christians asked Jews what it meant for them to ask for forgiveness for a history of persecution against Jews." Despite the difficult nature of these topics, "these interactions help to forge relationships and deepen understanding," he said, "and will contribute ultimately to the resolution or prevention of religious conflicts in the future." Indeed, these experiences build trust and connections within the group that enable us to develop a strong inter-religious community-because such a group, to function, must be built upon interpersonal relationships, not just ideals. By engaging in conversations throughout our time on the RLC, fellows get to know one another beyond the simple label of the Hindu Member or the Jewish Member, learning to see beyond socioeconomic, ethnic and religious stratifications.

As members of the council establish friendships throughout the years, we have attended one another's weddings, graduations, bridal showers, birthday parties, and religious holidays at one another's homes. We have come to understand that a true interfaith movement must be built upon strong interpersonal connections that require time and trust to develop. Sharing in meals, movies, and the more mundane and secular aspects of our lives establishes common experiences that allow us to approach our differences with more understanding.

We have learned to negotiate the internal conflicts between different views of an absolute Truth. Students find different ways of managing the reality that others are equally passionate about their own truth, about their God, about their way of life. "Admittedly, there were moments where I questioned the authenticity of certain religions," reflected RLC member Steven Kamara in a campus newspaper article after the 2004 Retreat. "How could they believe so strongly in a God who was so different from my God, I would ask. Could the universe harbor such mutually exclusive ideologies?" We have learned to accept that some discomfort is inevitable: many members of the council have felt similar disquietudes, yet members feel they can "respect without accepting" one another's beliefs, or "agree to disagree" on matters of faith.

Such an attitude is possible because we are not here to convince one another that we are "correct" or to draw converts into our religions. Instead, we seek to embody Gandhi's plea: "That whilst I hold by my own ... our inmost prayer should be that a Hindu be a better Hindu, a Muslim a better Muslim, and a Christian a better Christian. Above all, I plea for utter truthfulness." By challenging ourselves to be truthful in conversation, we have learned to emphasize the importance of an equal mind. People so often compare the best of their religion with the worst of others. We need to maintain a balanced perspective and compare the best of both religions--or, if we wish to discuss the shortcomings of other religions, we need to honestly acknowledge the shortcomings within our own faiths as well.

We have learned that interfaith dialogue is not only a way to learn about other religions, but also a way to deepen our understanding of our own religions. At the same time, we have learned humility as we often realize that, when asked to explain our traditions, we often know less than we had thought. The most revealing and illuminating conversations take place when people are honest enough to describe their own uncertainties and doubts, not only concerning other people's faiths, but their own. We have learned that more and more intricate complexities arise as we challenge our boundaries and continue to participate in the RLC over several years. "The deeper you delve into the ocean," said the Buddha, "the deeper it becomes." With each passing year we delve deeper, and the ocean in turn grows more profound.

Learning about other religions is no different, in truth, from learning a new language: we are exposed to the vocabulary that other people use to live their lives. In the RLC we might only touch on the verb "to be," past and present tense, but we are making a start. Through our annual retreat, spiritual autobiographies, weekly meetings, and community events, we are creating a path towards interfaith understanding and, ultimately, peace.

* This piece would not have been possible without contributions from many members of the Religious Life Council. I would especially like to thank Joe Skloot, who was the main author of the Weekly Meetings section. Many thanks also to Nick Kessides, Rabia Ali, and Ritu Kamal for their contributions.