Lazy crazy days.

I've come to the conclusion that anyone who enthuses about the lazy days of summer is either underage, delusional, or trying to sell you lemonade. I remember them--at least, I think I do--filled with hammocks, beaches, and drowsy afternoons. But my reality these days is quite different.

I'm hard to miss poolside. Just look for the harried mom commandeering an entire picnic table for her laptop, two briefcases, and cell phone. I've traded high heels for flip-flops, perfume for sunscreen. Business conversations are punctuated by splashes from kids leaping mindlessly off the high dive. That's when I wonder, "When did lazy become crazy?"

When I was homeschooling my children, I actually looked forward to summer. It was less busy. Now that my cherubs attend private school, summer has become the nightmare before autumn. Jobs don't stop for summer, and having kids around the house on a regular basis is similar to having relatives visiting. You feel guilty if you don't show them a good time each and every day.

So the main challenge is to figure out how to work and have the most fun possible before summer slips away. Quite frankly, it might be easier to pull a rabbit out of a hat, but I do have some tricks up my sleeve that may not land you in a hammock with a tall glass of lemonade, but could keep you from pulling all your hair out before September intervenes.

First, lower your expectations. Working parents can't afford to relish romantic, unrealistic ideas about summer. A lot of my seasonal guilt complex comes from remembering the summers of my childhood and knowing I can't duplicate them for my kids. In reality, my summers weren't that stellar. I just remember them that way; conveniently blocking out all the digging we did in the garden under the hot sun. Summer wasn't designed to be a continual funfest.

Make it quality, not quantity. It's more reasonable to plan occasional excursions--say to a museum or favorite beach--than to cram in many small trips that have you constantly on the go. Those fewer junkets will be more memorable because, being less frequent, they'll be special.

Stop planning. You don't have to micromanage your children's summer. Give them time to get bored, to make up games, to be lazy on their own. You weren't created to be a one-person entertainment system.

Use downtime effectively. Take advantage of the downtime you do have--after supper, say, when the family is all together. Take advantage of the extra sunlight courtesy of daylight savings time. Head outside and play ball or pop some popcorn or tackle a favorite board game on the porch. Invite friends over you don't get to see during the hectic rush of the school year when you are juggling sports, music lessons, and homework assignments.

Work your schedule. Schedules can be tricky beasts. If you want lazy instead of crazy times, you have to plan for them by not planning anything else. Cramming your schedule with busyness leaves no time for those unplanned, spontaneous, relaxing moments. Pencil in downtime right along with the other appointments, or you'll find it swept away by the summer breeze.

Your crazy days of summer may not ever be truly lazy. There may be few beaches, instant lemonade, or hammocks. But if you take a little time to share moments of sunshine and laughter with your children, they can be days you look back on and remember with fondness and a touch of nostalgia. Your kids will remember them as stellar.

Celeste perrino Walker can be seen poolside during most of Rutland, Vermont's three-day summer season.