LOVE ON THE RUN; FOR MANY, PARTNER IN LIFE MEANS PARTNER IN FITNESS.

Byline: Ronni Ross / Running

What will you do to fan the flames of love this Valentine's Day?

For some couples, the key to romance is to work up a sweat together . . . through fitness. They grow strong together, compete together, fight together and make up together. They run for the love of it and for the love of each other.

``You get a lot of different benefits out of it,'' said Mark Trachman of Rancho Santa Marguerita, a 32-year-old Los Angeles police officer who met his wife, Tiffany, in college during an intramural triathlon. They've been working out together since. ``You get the fitness benefits, plus the time together . . . because we have that shared interest.''

Partners can push their limits because of the demanding nature of the relationship and the increased trust. Convenience and familiarity breeds confidence as couples bond through exercise.

And because of their common love of running and racing, perhaps it's not surprising that many first met working out and weaved the regimen into the fabric of their linked lives.

John and Marga Hughes of Santa Monica met while running on a beachside bike path three years ago and were married the next year. They had their first child four months ago and now the three of them exercise together.

``We run where we met, only now it's with a stroller,'' said John, 33, a commercial insurance-claims specialist. Though their running time has decreased since the baby's birth, they have raced in half-marathons together in the past, and traditionally run a race together each January to celebrate the anniversary of the date they met.

Keith and Nicette Holder's relationship began when they accidentally wound up racing on the same team. Avid solo mountain bike racers for many years, the Newhall couple received sponsorship from a bicycle company and wound up racing on the same team for a year.

They had never met before, but during the course of the year they hit it off. Now they race together on a tandem mountain bike and frequently win their events.

``It absolutely enhances our marriage. There's no question about it,'' said Keith, 36. ``If we go out and do something really hard, like an 80- or 90-mile bike ride, we can relate to each other. Two guys can talk about a basketball game they just played, or fishing, and we can do that. It's kind of rare.''

Running for romance seems to be a universal phenomenon for coupled athletes. Some 135 athletes out of the 750 participants - or 18 percent - in last year's national Hi-Tec Adventure Racing Series were romantic partners, according to event officials.

Don and Sandy Collette of Port Charlotte, Fla., agree that shared training goals have cemented their relationship.

They have competed together in triathlons, the Boston and Walt Disney World marathons, and, in September, the Miami Hi-Tec Adventure Race, which included a 6.3-mile trail run, an hour-long kayak, a 12-mile mountain bike ride and a few strenuous surprise events.

``It was one of the toughest things I ever did. It was grueling, but it was so much fun,'' said Sandy, a 41-year-old county planner. ``Because Don's the better athlete, he works me hard and pushes me. That's good. I can't be lazy around him.''

``We enjoy it, we actually have a good time training together. We motivate each other and spur each other on,'' said Don, 48, a sales representative. ``It has become our lifestyle. It's who we are and we understand each other's needs.''

Agoura Hills' Mike Ginley so enjoys training and racing with his wife, Kristen, he proposed to her while running.

``It's nice to have a training partner right at home,'' he said. ``When I met my wife, I got her into running, and she just did her first marathon last spring. Now she runs more than I do and she beats me. I'm hoping to keep up with her at the next race.''

Kristen added, ``I definitely think we have a really good marriage and the fact that we run together helps us. We keep pushing ourselves farther, and from running we've branched out into other sports and found other interests we can share, both athletic and nonathletic. That's important for a marriage.''

While racing and working out as a pair certainly creates a unique opportunity to bond, couples also find that keeping fit together enhances their love life.

``It definitely makes you more intimate,'' said Nicette Holder, a 30-year-old fitness instructor. ``Anything you do that makes you respect (your partner) more, plus the fact that you're out there in a race relying on him, makes you feel more connected and therefore more intimate. There's more of a bond. You feel he's out there for you and you're out there for him. It brings strength into the relationship.''

Working out together can cause also an occasional ripple, the couples agree, but those incidences are typically short-lived.

``We've had our best fights doing a canyon run,'' said Tiffany Trachman, a 31-year-old aerobics instructor. ``You can scream at the top of your lungs and no one can hear you. It's a place where if you're mad, you can just get it out. You don't have to whisper or anything.''

The Ginleys also have a tiff now and then while running.

``There's been a couple of times I've turned around and gone home,'' said Kristen. ``I'm definitely the crankier person, I admit it. I'm kind of a hothead. But if I go home, by the time he gets home, I've calmed down and can talk about it.''

But like finishing a torturous marathon, everything works out in the end, Keith Holder said.

``Sometimes, it can hinder intimacy because we're too tired, but when you're healthy, in general, everything works better,'' he said with a laugh.

One of the most important things to remember when exercising with your sweetheart, couples say, is to avoid getting overly competitive with one another and to be cautious when offering advice - no backseat running.

``Both parties need to be very tolerant and forgiving,'' said Nicette Holder. ``You have to be mature and humble. When one partner tries to teach the other, it's hard on the relationship. When you're with a stranger, you're less apt to be defensive. That's true with everything.''

But for all its shortcomings, competition is a powerful magnet.

``We both have a competitive nature, so it's hard not to compete with each other,'' said Mark Trachman. ``We can't take that part of us out; that's one of the things that drew us together.''

And that's what keeps many partners running strong.

CAPTION(S):

3 Photos

PHOTO (1--Color) At bottom: Romance on the run comes in all forms, as evidenced by Florida's Sandy and Don Collette, who emerge from the drink during the Miami whistlestop of the 1997 national Hi-Tec Adventure Racing Series in September.

(2--Color) Above left: Kristen and Mike Ginley (pictured running first and third at a Hartford, Conn., Hi-Tec contest in July) of Agoura Hills are so taken by training and running with each other, they were engaged while running.

(3--Color) Top right: Newhall's Nicette Holder met her husband, Keith - close on her wheels here at a Castaic Lake race in November - when they were accidentally paired for an earlier event.

Photos by Nathan Bilow Photography

Photo Illustration by Traci Wooden / Daily News