LEUKEMIA NO MATCH FOR GIRL'S HEART.

Byline: Dennis McCarthy 

AGOURA HILLS - It shines in Emily's eyes and smile, her grandmother says - this incredible spirit that reaches out and grabs your heart. It just won't let go.

You can see it in the video her 7-year-old granddaughter made recently for her second-grade classmates at Lupin Hill Elementary School in Calabasas, thanking them for their own special videotape they made for her this Halloween.

The kids knew Emily was pretty down right now, having to return to Childrens Hospital Los Angeles again to undergo another round of chemotherapy to hopefully cure the leukemia that just won't stay away.

They wanted to cheer her up, so each classmate said a little something personal on the video before they all wished her the same thing - a speedy return to them.

They missed her, they said - missed that smile and spirit that's made them call her their friend.

``She was so touched by that video, so proud of it, that she wanted to make a special one for them,'' Mary Ellen Hivner, Emily's grandmother, said Monday.

She's living at the family's Agoura Hills home full time now, watching Emily's brother and sister - Max, 6, and Ilsa, 4 - while her daughter and son-in-law, Tracey and David Buelow, spend their days and most of the nights at the hospital with their daughter.

It changes everyone's life, a serious illness like this, Mary Ellen says. It can't help but turn a family upside down, and cause everyone enough heartbreak for a lifetime.

But whenever they need a shoulder to lean on, or someone to put a smile on their face, they know exactly where to turn. Right to Emily herself. She's the rock, the spirit of this family.

``Emily got out of that hospital bed for her video, put on a big, floppy hat the nurses had given her to cover her bald head, and, in her nightie, started pushing her IV pole down the hallway, introducing her classmates to all the nurses and other kids on her floor,'' Mary Ellen said.

Smiling and putting on a show. The spirit of her granddaughter coming through again loud and clear, grabbing everyone's heart and refusing to let go.

Deborah Heumann, a neighbor and friend of the Buelows, has seen it. Felt it. Her daughter, Samantha, has been good friends with Emily since the families moved to the Lost Hills neighborhood about the same time three years ago.

``Samantha, like Emily's classmates at Lupin, has never known her not to be fighting leukemia,'' Deborah said. ``They all feel so bad for her having to go back into the hospital, but they're sure in their hearts that she'll be better soon.''

But it's going to take a lot of help - medically, emotionally and financially, everyone knows.

Deborah has been spearheading a community effort for bone marrow blood drives for Emily, and fund-raisers to help the Buelows pay the astronomical medical costs associated with an illness like this.

``Even with medical insurance, an illness like this can be financially crippling,'' Deborah said. ``It costs $1,700 a week just for Emily's medicines.''

Sadly, the Buelows are not alone. Dr. Neena Kapoor, medical director of the bone marrow transplant program at Childrens Hospital, said every space is taken at the 11-bed facility. And more children are on a waiting list.

``It's sad but we're doing the best we can do,'' Kapoor said. ``There's always a waiting list.''

Today at El Torito Restaurant, 6040 Canoga Ave., in Woodland Hills, the first of two local fund-raisers is being held to help the Buelows. Twenty percent of the cost of every lunch and dinner sold will be going to the family. Just tell the server you are there for Emily.

Also, on Thursday from 5:30 to 8:30 p.m. at the Westlake Village Inn - 32001 Agoura Road, in Westlake Village - a wine-tasting fund-raiser will be held. For more information and reservations, call [phone].

Kapoor said she's seen friends, neighbors and strangers rally behind a sick child, helping everyone. ``It's more a question of awareness,'' Kapoor said. ``If people know about these kids needing donations like blood donated for them, the community does reach out.''

Mary Ellen says her granddaughter has been fighting leukemia since she was 4. She's beat it into remission a couple of times already, but now she's back to fighting it again.

The doctors have told the family it will be tougher this time because those leukemia cells hiding away in Emily's body beat the chemo that was supposed to destroy them the previous time she was in the hospital seven months ago.

``They come back stronger and smarter, and the analogy the doctors use is they're sending in the smart bombs to kill them now,'' Deborah said Monday. ``That's what's happening to Emily this week.''

Six to eight hours a day of chemotherapy drips, with more blood drives and bone marrow testing set for January.

``This has been a very emotional, trying time for our family, but people have been so wonderful, opening their hearts to us,'' Mary Ellen said.

They can't help themselves. They see that spirit shining in Emily's eyes and smile - reaching out and grabbing their hearts. Refusing to let go.

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Photo:

(color) A smiling Emily Buelow, 7, of Agoura Hills is shown before she entered Childrens Hospital Los Angeles for her latest treatments for leukemia. Her medicine alone costs $1,700 a week and fund-raisers are being held to help defray the hospital bill.