LET YOUR CHILDREN GAIN SELF-CONFIDENCE, INDEPENDENCE THROUGH VARIETY OF TASKS.

Byline: Alice Green Valley Morning Star

Following these suggestions will encourage your child's independence, self-confidence, reasonable freedom of choice, orderliness and responsibility.

Arrange bathroom facilities for the child: a stool to reach the sink with his own washcloth, towel, hairbrush and toothbrush in an assigned place.

Keep a container of juice or water on a low shelf in the refrigerator and make cups accessible for all those ``I want a drink'' requests. Simply say, ``You may get it.''

Invite the child to help you make his bed, dust, sweep, care for pets, sort laundry, according to dark and light for washing, etc.

Create the possibility of order for the child's toys and belongings. Provide enough space so that each item can have its place on a shelf. Display only toys and materials the child can handle and work with successfully.

Show the child how to clean up after working with something and where to return it to its place. Be firm that this is done before other activities are begun.

Set aside an area of the yard where the child can garden: hoe and rake, plant and water.

Reflect on a typical day. Were the majority of your encounters with your child of a negating or a restraining nature? Build up a positive relationship between you and your child. Play games with him occasionally. Give him your total attention, if only for a few moments. Matching games, which stimulate sensory perception, are easily invented and prepared. Example: Present him with a color, then ask him to show you objects of that same color in the room. Show him a piece of wood, glass or plastic and ask him to find other objects made of this or that.

Observe your child and watch for times when he is particularly interested in color, shape, texture, number, etc.

When your daily schedule allows for an unrushed trip to the grocery store, your child can benefit from this. On this occasion, let him walk instead of ride through the aisles with you. ``Oranges, we need six. 1,2,3,4,5,6.'' Point out, name, examine gently, count, weigh and describe.

Excursions to the zoo. The entire zoo area need not be covered in one visit. Follow your child and occasionally give him an example of what observing really is. Sit or stand and watch a particular cage or family of animals for some time. Talk about what you see in detail. Don't simply flit past everything with him in hand.

Whenever demonstrating a task to your child, first perform the actions very carefully yourself. Show him step by step, using as few words as possible.

Respect and observe your child. An inner guide is directing him. Become sensitive to anticipate and aid him.

Introduce the rules and limits of your household gradually. Make them possible for your child to adapt to. Once you have made them, be consistent and remember: Your example is the best teacher.

Children learn by imitating the adults, so set a good example of being on time for school and other things involving the family.

Plan some time each day to be shared with your child alone. However short, he can rely on it for his time. Do not accept his interference in time that is another child's special time or your special time.