JEWS PREPARE PASSOVER RITUALS; HOLIDAY MARKED WITH TRADITIONS.

Byline: Douglas Clark Daily News Staff Writer

When Passover celebrations begin at sundown today, most Jewish families will follow tradition by allowing the youngest child to ask, Why is this night different from all other nights?

It's an important moment, as Jews recount the historic exodus from enslavement in Egypt. But it doesn't always go as planned.

Andy Weinstein, president of Congregation B'Nai Emet, recalled Thursday the year he coached his son, Aaron, then 3, to ask the big question.

``I really wanted him to ask his grandfather. And I even shortened it for him to make it easier,'' he said. ``But when it came time, he asked, `Why is this light bulb different?' It started a new tradition. We always remember that moment before beginning Passover.''

Rabbi Michelle Paskow of B'Nai Emet said humor and a light heart are appropriate for a holiday that marks the liberation of a people unbowed by hardship.

``Everybody has their own personal enslavement. But you liberate yourself from your problems and your sorrows and try to move beyond all that,'' she said.

``Also it's a celebration of springtime. It's no coincidence that Easter and Passover have some similar symbols. We have an egg on the Seder plate,'' she said. ``It's symbolic of the wholeness of life - the cycle and rebirth.''

The eight-day Passover celebration begins with the Seder, a special meal where family members gather to read from the Haggada, the ritual book that tells the story of Exodus.

Although Paskow, like other Jews, will be with her family tonight, at 6 p.m. Saturday she'll lead a community Seder at Dakota's Restaurant, 2525 Stow, Simi Valley. For reservations, call [phone], or [phone].

``The first night is more for family and close friends,'' she said. ``But not everyone knows the rituals, so they like the community Seder.''

This year, Shari and Steve Goldstein will memorialize the victims of the Holocaust before beginning the Seder at their Simi Valley home, where about 25 family members will gather.

``The six memorial candles will burn in memory of the 6 million Jews who perished in World War II. We'll probably do it every year from now on,'' Shari Goldstein said. ``We can't celebrate this joyous occasion until we take a moment to remember those who can't celebrate with us because they lost their lives.''

Goldstein enjoys the Seder because it involves children and adults, who take turns reading from the Haggada. Also, the story of Moses parting the Red Sea so that Jews could elude Egyptian soldiers is one for the ages and for all peoples.

``The story of Passover is universal because it's not just the Jews who were enslaved,'' she said. ``It still goes on today in certain cultures.''

Paskow said Passover celebrations change subtly each year as world events unfold.

``This is a unique generation - post-Holocaust. We have great freedoms in this country. We need to appreciate it and enjoy it and make it work,'' she said.

Passover also puts in perspective personal travails, said Weinstein, who must find a new location for the Jewish Community Center Preschool before summer.

``You can look into the story of Passover and say, this is what they did, and therefore what I'm trying to do is much smaller,'' she said. ``I can, with God's help, set off to do this task.

``On one hand, it's a memorable time; you're supposed to look back,'' she said. But on the other hand, it's joyous because we were victorious and able to gain our freedom. It's a long ceremony, but uplifting.''