INTRO TO INTROVERSION THEY'RE OUTNUMBERED BY EXTROVERTS, BUT 'INNIES' NEEDN'T BE SHY ABOUT THEIR GOOD QUALITIES.

Byline: Mariko Thompson Staff Writer

THE LIST of famous ``innies'' is distinguished and diverse - news anchor Diane Sawyer, comedian Steve Martin, basketball star Michael Jordan, former president Jimmy Carter. We're not talking about belly buttons or power circles or hipster quotient. We're talking about introverts.

But wait, how can celebrities who have achieved the pinnacle of success in their respective fields be introverted? Introverts are wallflowers, sticks in the mud, shrinking violets, right?

Actually, introverts tend to have great powers of concentration, develop deep friendships and have strong people skills in small-group or one-on-one situations, writes Calabasas psychologist Marti Olsen Laney in her new book, ``The Introvert Advantage.'' Typecast as shy and socially inept by an extrovert world, many introverts have come to believe their own bad press, she said.

``There's so much stigma, and it's sad,'' Laney said. ``It helps to realize that a lot of people in the limelight are introverts.''

In the United States, introverts might feel out of place because they're outnumbered by extroverts by a ratio of 3-to-1. Rather than try to become extroverts, introverts need to embrace their good qualities, said Laney.

Not surprisingly, Laney loves the Aesop story of the tortoise and the hare, which teaches people to trust their natural strengths. In the fable, the extroverted hare is speedy, but the steady, introverted tortoise wins the race.

The key difference between the two is from where they derive energy. Introverts are fueled by ideas, impressions and emotions. Extroverts are energized by people, places and activities. Introverts prefer depth, while extroverts seek breadth.

``We live in an extrovert culture where we value snappy thinking, speaking and acting,'' Laney said. ``People who are introverts feel there's something wrong with them. Actually, they're extremely intelligent, but they don't understand how their minds work.''

Deep or narcissistic?

Psychoanalyst Carl Jung saw our innate temperaments as falling on a spectrum with very introverted and very extroverted at either end. People contain both types of energy to varying degrees, but one is likely to be the more dominant. Think of yin and yang, left-handed and right-handed.

This Jungian view was adopted by social scientists Isabel Myers and Katharine Briggs, who developed the wildly popular personality typing test. However, it's the Freudian view that forged introversion's negative stereotype. After a bitter falling-out with Jung, Freud began associating introversion with narcissism, Laney said.

Laney discovered she was introverted when she took the Myers-Briggs test. Familiar only with the stereotype, she was shocked by her high introverted score.

``I had a lot of friends and really wasn't a shy person,'' she said. ``And I was never attracted to log cabins or bomb building or anything like that. Once I understood that it was about energy and where you tend to be focused, I realized that it did sound like me.''

Wanting to enlighten her fellow introverts, Laney began doing research for her book and kept stumbling into the stereotype. She discovered 30 books on shyness, but not one that explained introversion.

Busting stereotypes

While an introvert may be shy, not all shy people are introverted. Introversion is innate. Shyness is a painful self-consciousness that develops through feelings of embarrassment or humiliation. Most people can pinpoint the specific event where their shyness began, said Bernardo Carducci, psychology professor and director of the Shyness Research Institute at Indiana University Southeast, in New Albany.

Carducci uses a party scenario to illustrate the difference. The introvert isn't afraid to talk to people, but might stand in the corner to take a break from the crowd. The shy person stands in the corner because he feels he has no choice.

``That's the pain of shyness,'' Carducci said. ``They want to be social and they can't.''

Carducci's research shows there are far more shy people than introverts. More than 40 percent of Americans say they are habitually shy. So even if every introvert is shy, there are still plenty of shy extroverts out there. Suffering from shyness can be harder on extroverts, because the contact they need also makes them anxious.

``A shy extrovert can't get their energy restored so it's really a problem,'' Laney said.

So how can introverts and extroverts bridge the gap? Listening to the clients in her family practice, Laney began to see how introversion affected all areas of life, including career, marriage and child-rearing.

In the workplace, the Myers-Briggs personality test often is used by companies for team-building or recruiting purposes. Although introversion- extroversion is only one of four spectra measured on the test, introversion is the most feared label because of the negative associations, said David Logan, director of the USC Marshall School of Business executive education program.

The stigma is unfortunate, because introverts tend to be thoughtful, strategic and focused - all valuable traits in the workplace, he said.

``As a matter of fact, extroverts have more challenges than introverts,'' Logan said. ``They tend to ramble incessantly and need to work on a sense of focus.''

Introverts are found in all kinds of occupations, from acting to politics to sales. Sometimes within the same profession, surroundings can make a difference. A doctor who's an introvert might enjoy running a practice, in which appointments are scheduled and personal contact is one-on-one. However, that same doctor might be overwhelmed by the noise and chaos of the emergency room, Laney said.

And although introverts enjoy socializing, they can be intimidated by large, anonymous events and the concept of networking. Introverts can restore their energy by taking breaks or by setting a time limit on how long they stay, Laney said.

``There's nothing wrong with strolling around the back yard at a party, looking at people's family photographs, or going to the corner at the convention for a while,'' she said.

In dating and marriage, the extrovert-introvert combination can form a wonderful counterbalance or be the source of conflict. Following the adage of opposites attract, the combination couple is the most common, Laney said. Problems arise when the extrovert accuses the introvert of withdrawing, and the introvert can't understand why the extrovert wants to go out all the time.

Usually the solutions are simple. The couple plans weekends with a mix of social events and quiet time. The extrovert attends some functions with friends while the introvert relaxes at home. They take separate cars to events so the introvert can leave early and the extrovert can stay late.

``I've been married to an extrovert for 38 years,'' Laney said. ``He pulls me out into the world to do things I've never done. I help him learn more about his internal self.''

Introverted children in an extroverted family also need consideration. Many parents over-schedule their introverted children, shuttling them from one activity to another. Then they're puzzled when the child either zones out or throws a tantrum.

Introverted children need their own space and time for reflection, Laney said. Parents also should be aware that introverts like to observe an activity before joining. Mom and Dad need to let their introverted children know that this is OK, she said.

``These things are easy to work out if you accept the differences and learn what the differences are,'' Laney said.

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

Look over the two lists of qualities below and check the ones that are most like you. Not every characteristic on a list will fit. Answer as you are, not as you would like to be.

List A

Like to be in the thick of things

Relish variety, bored with sameness

Know lots of people, consider them friends

Enjoy chitchatting, even with strangers

Feel stoked after activity, eager for more

Speak or act without needing to think first

Are generally quite peppy

Tend to talk more than listen

List B

Prefer to relax alone or with a few close friends

Consider only deep relationships as friends

Need rest after outside activities, even ones you enjoy

Often listen but talk a lot about topics of importance to you

Appear calm, self-contained, and like to observe

Tend to think before you act or speak

Experience mind going blank in groups or under pressure

Don't like feeling rushed

If you checked more qualities from List A, you're an extrovert. If you checked more qualities from List B, you're an introvert. Remember, extroversion and introversion form a spectrum so some people will fall in the middle.

- From ``The Introvert Advantage'' (Workman Publishing; $14.95) by Marti Olsen Laney.

CAPTION(S):

2 photos, box

Photo:

(1 -- cover -- color) are they shey ... or just introverted?

(2) Marti Olsen Laney of Calabasas, a psychologist, wrote ``The Introvert Advantage'' to shed light on an often misunderstood personality trait. ``There's so much stigma, and it's sad,'' she says.

Joe Binoya/Special to the Daily News

Box:

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? (see text)