I'm not ready to kiss my freedom goodbye.
This concept of a little human being one day living in a woman's tummy, then the next being very much alive never ceases to amaze me.
Especially when the little person is as big as this baby.
He was literally a bouncing boy from the moment he was born - all 9lbs 8oz of him. He's huge, but absolutely perfect and adorable.
Having not yet had one of my own, I'm always asking naive questions about childbirth and the whole experience.
I wanted to know how quickly she'd lost her bump, which was pretty considerable, but I was amazed to discover she "went down like a souffl" just two days after the birth.
And I wanted to know if she'd worried about losing any dignity during the whole thing.
Her answer was when you're giving birth to a baby that big, you could do it in the middle of Sauchiehall Street on a busy Saturday afternoon and not care.
I ooo-ed and aah-ed at his little fingers and toes and took delight in buying the tiniest tracksuit you've ever seen.
And I went all gooey when he fell asleep beside his dad and they both woke up, stretching and yawning at the same time.
But when my friend told me he feeds from her constantly - for hours at a time - and she spends the rest of her time cleaning up what comes out the other end, I started to see the reality of babies.
After a few hours, I was exhausted watching her trying to make dinner, tidy the house and keep baby happy.
She has no time for herself and says she feels like a mum instead of an individual.
But, she says it's worth every second.
Meanwhile, I was banging on about holidays, what clubs I want to go to and how many times I'm going out to dinner this week.
She always says I'm like Patsy from AbFab anyway, but now she's faced with the reality of a wee human being to look after, she just shakes her head and laughs at me.
I told her my new diet is only to eat half of what's on my plate and throw the rest away - so now I just order double. Hers is to skip break- fast, lunch and dinner and grab some toast because she's too busy.
I told her about a party and she said: "We'll ask my mum to look after the baby so we can have a big night ... and go to bed at 7pm to sleep for 12 hours.
"That's the kind of party we want."
I mentioned buying a new dress and she bemoaned the price of baby-gros.
I love my friend's baby, but when I left to go to a party and she could hardly keep her eyes open at four in the afternoon, I couldn't help feeling like I was abandoning her.
I have offered to babysit and we'll have a girls' night out soon.
But it's easy for me, I can hand baby back and go home to a full night's sleep.
When my time comes, I'm sure I'll be as doting as any parent.
But I reckon I should make the most of my freedom ...
Parties, clubs, here I come!
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|Publication:||Daily Record (Glasgow, Scotland)|
|Date:||Jul 16, 1997|
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