I'm not going to take it anymore: fighting sexual harassment in the workplace.

Patricia Wingard Carson, a field coordinator for an Ohio state court, always assumed that her work spoke for itself - until a new supervisor took a "personal" interest in her.

"The leering, staring and unwanted touching began almost immediately," Carson recalls. "He told hideous jokes. I was afraid to be alone with this man." Things got worse after they went on a business trip together and she refused his advances. When Carson got back to the office, menial jobs were dumped on her desk.

Like most victims of sexual harassment, Carson hesitated to take action. Her best bet, she decided, was to try to outlast her boss. A year later, he was appointed to a new government position. "I laughed that I had won - or so I thought," says Carson, author of peculiar Pain: A Close Look at Black on Black Sexual Harassment and Its Impact (Kendall/Hunt; $24.95). A couple of weeks later, she was fired from her job. According to her personnel records, she was incompetent, noncooperative and actively violent.

Fed up, Carson filed a lawsuit. The investigation lasted a year and a half, during which time she developed stress-related vertigo and went into therapy. In the end, a settlement was reached. "It's an experience that truly tested my faith," says Carson, who now works as a motivational speaker. But, she insists, "I would do it again."

Once a taboo subject, sexual harassment is now out in the open, and fewer victims are willing to suffer in silence. In 1994, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission received 14,420 sexual harassment claims, up from 5,623 in 1989. Companies, too, are finally recognizing that they need to do something. According to a recent poll by the Society for Human Resource Management, 63% of companies surveyed view sexual harassment as a real problem. Three-quarters of them offer training programs, and 97% have instituted written policies on sexual harassment.

Still, "about 90% of cases are never reported," estimates William Petrocelli, co-author of Sexual Harassment on the Job: What It Is and How to Stop It (Nolo Press; $18.95). Despite all the publicity, many of us aren't sure what sexual harassment is. The EEOC defines it as unwelcome sexual advances, verbal remarks and/or physical contact. It is not an isolated incident or personality conflict. The harasser can be male or female. He or she can be a supervisor, a co-worker or a nonemployee, and doesn't have to be of the opposite sex.

While people are becoming more aware of their rights, many don't know how to protect themselves. Floyd Weatherspoon, associate professor of law at Capital University School of Law in Columbus, Ohio, offers the following tips:

* Sexual harassment is really about power. Tell your harasser - in no uncertain terms - no.

* Document any alleged acts of sexual harassment. Keep notes with dates, times, witnesses, etc.

* Be cautious about dating people from work, and avoid discussing your personal life, particularly your love life, with co-workers.

* Don't gossip about your colleagues, and don't tell any jokes with sexual connotations.

* Find out what your company's policy on sexual harassment is.

* If you continue to be harassed, contact your human resources department. Keep a record of who you spoke to, the date and time and any action that was taken.

* If your company doesn't act on it, contact the EEOC, your state's civil rights association or ultimately an attorney.

In the end, only you can decide whether or not to fight back. "It's a hard choice to make," admits Carson. "I was fighting for my personal integrity; it was something I had to do." She adds, "One person can make a difference."

How to spot sexual harassment

Quid pro quo ("this for that") harassment occurs when someone with power

and authority:

* offers a subordinate work-related benefits, e.g., promotions or raises, in exchange for sexual favors;

* denies a subordinate job-related benefits as punishment for refusing to submit to sexual advances;

* retaliates against a subordinate for filing a complaint or for cooperating with an investigation. The subordinate might be fired, demoted or intimated.

Hostile environment involves sexually offensive behaviors that make it

difficult or unpleasant for

an employee to do his or her job:

* physical acts, such as unnecessary touching, kissing, grabbing, exposing oneself or coercing sexual intercourse;

* verbal behaviors, such as obscene language, sexual innuendo, commenting on someone's appearance or spreading rumors about a person's sex life;

* nonverbal conduct, such as sexually explicit pin-ups, sexual graffiti, pornography, whistling, suggestive noises or giving gifts of a sexual nature.