Honey won't hold if the ham is heated.

Byline: FOOD DUDE By Lewis Taylor The Register-Guard

Mother of Food Dude used to cut up peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to look like airplanes. I liked to pretend the food was flying into my mouth. It was cute for a while. Then I outgrew it, and suddenly it wasn't.

I'm not sure if American moms still do this for their kids, but apparently the Japanese do and they've taken it to a whole new level. Stay-at-home moms with too much time on their hands spend hours sculpting dinosaurs out of dyed rice and Frankensteins out of fried tofu. They use razor blades and tweezers to create intricate details such as whiskers on a cat's face or pearl earrings on a woman's head.

Now I don't mean to be culturally insensitive here, but Food Dude thinks this bento art, as it's called, is one really silly idea. I'm in favor of making food look pretty but this is all about the moms. It's like one of those obnoxious dinner hosts who insists on telling you how hard they worked to cook for you. I'm grateful that you're feeding me, but I don't need to feel guilty about it.

Why don't you let the food speak for itself?

I appreciated my mom cutting those sandwiches up into little jet planes, but what I really remember was how those PB&Js tasted when they touched down inside my mouth. The real love was inside the sandwich.

If you think food is for eating, Food Dude would like to hear from you. Send your food-related questions to the address at the end of the column.

Dear Food Dude: The label on my Honey Baked Ham tells me not to heat the ham, but to serve it at room temperature. Why can't I warm my ham?

- E.H.

Dear E.H.: I hear you, bro. The last time Food Dude had a Honey Baked Ham, the guy behind the counter warned me (twice) not to heat the thing before serving. You'd think we were dealing with a jar of polonium 210, not a smoked pig leg.

Debbie Domer, director of marketing for Honey Baked Ham, says the warning is really more of a recommendation for "optimal enjoyment."

"The ham has already been fully cooked and smoked for up to 24 hours," she explains. "It's very delicate, so we recommend bringing it out (of the fridge) about 30 minutes before serving so it will come to room temperature."

Not only can heating a Honey Baked Ham dry it out, it can turn that signature, crunchy honey coating into mush, Domer says.

With Easter in the air, this is a busy time of year for Honey Baked Ham. The 50-year-old company still sells more hams at Christmas, but Easter is the second-biggest time of year, Domer says. And if you're wondering, the Southern United States is the country's biggest consumer of hams.

Honey Baked Ham is well known for its honey glaze and its precut "spiral sliced" hams, which the company says makes for easy serving. But there are lots of other places to buy a ham in town. And you don't necessarily need a spiral cut to enjoy some of that falling-off-the-bone Easter goodness.

Long's Meat Market will sell you a ham, remove the bone and then reinsert the bone, owner Mike Wooley says. That way you get the added flavor of the bone while cooking or reheating the ham, and you can easily serve your guests when it's time to carve that piggy up. A general rule for reheating precooked hams is 20 minutes per pound in a 325-degree oven or until it reaches an internal temperature of 140 degrees. Partially cooked ham should be cooked to 160 degrees inside.

Although 95 percent of the hams sold at Long's are dry cured, smoked hams (aka country hams), there are other types. Many people think a fresh ham is one that isn't frozen, but the term refers to a grayish-pink leg of pork that hasn't been cured or smoked. Unlike a precooked ham, a fresh ham cooks for about seven hours and comes out tasting more like a pork roast.

Some mass produced hams are soaked in brine or injected with brine for curing rather than rubbed with salt the way a country ham is. Known as city hams or wet cured hams, these are the kind of hams you're likely to find at a grocery store.

Wet cured hams tend to be less flavorful and, Wooley says, they can be packed with excess water. Ham labeled "with natural juices" has the least amount of water of the wet cured hams. "Water added" ham has more water and "ham and water" products can contain any amount of water, although the content must be stated on the package as a percentage of added ingredients.

Hams can be fully cooked, partially cooked or uncooked. Many hams are smoked. They also can be boiled. Hams can be boned, partially boned or sold as "bone-in," such as the ones at Long's or Honey Baked Ham.

You can buy whole hams, center ham slices (the best cut of the ham) or half hams - either the butt end (upper cut) or the shank end (lower cut). The butt end is bulkier and meatier. The shank end is easier to carve because it has only one leg bone. Both ends sell for the same price per pound at Long's.

Long's carries hams from Zenners, a German company based in Portland. Wooley says the company does old-fashioned style country hams and doesn't buy from some of the less reputable, large-scale hog farms that supply much of the country. Zenners buys its hogs from a small farm in Carlton.

Wooley's Easter table has been known to feature everything from a leg of lamb to a lamb rack to a fresh ham. This year he's opting for a country ham.

Talk to the Food Dude at www.registerguard.com/blogs/index.php/fooddude. Or, send mail to Food Dude, The Register Guard, P.O. Box 10188, Eugene, OR 97440-2168.