Hearsay.

"I will now, as a lawyer, be wearing women's clothing."

Wellington, New Zealand, attorney ROB MOODIE, on his choice of new courtroom attire. Moodie--a 67-year-old, bald, mustached former rugby player--appeared at a recent hearing wearing a woman's suit, diamond jewelry, and stockings. He also asked the court to address him as "Ms. Alice." Moodie said he was protesting the male-dominated culture of New Zealand's judiciary.

"Heck, it doesn't come very often a good man comes to your doorstep."

LORNA JEANNE DUDASH of Aloha, Oregon, who tried to turn an emergency-services dispatcher into a matchmaker. After neighbors complained about noise from Dudash's home, the sheriff's office sent a deputy to talk to her. After the deputy left, Dudash called 911 and asked that the "cutie pie" officer be sent back to her house so she could ask him for a date. He did return--to arrest Dudash for abusing the emergency dispatch system.

"It's still a piece of art. It's just a piece of art that doesn't run."

Car dealer MARK JOHNSTON, co-owner of Grand Prix Motors in Mar Vista, California, who spent $1.7 million on a rare Mercedes-Benz roadster that stopped running 10 blocks into its first test drive. Johnston sued the automaker for breach of contract and negligence, saying that repeated attempts to repair the car failed.

"It has to be him. I've heard about him."

JEANNINE GOCHE, a lawyer who lives in Pelham, New York, correctly guessing the identity of a thief who ran off with her gardening gloves. A neighborhood cat named Willy had been stealing residents' gloves, which he carried back to his home. Willy's owners hung up a clothesline in their yard strung with nine pairs of gloves (and five unmatched singles) and a sign that read, "Our cat is a glove snatcher--take these if yours."

--From newspaper and wire reports

TRIAL[C] 2006 (ISSN 0041-2538) is published monthly, with an additional special issue in October provided to ATLA members only, by the Association of Trial Lawyers of America, The Leonard M. Ring Law Center, 1050 31st St., N.W., Washington, DC 20007-4499; 202-965-3500. Printed in the United States of America. Basic rate $40 when received as a benefit to ATLA members. Subscriptions: $79 annually. Student price $25. Back issues $10 each for issues no older than one year; $20 each for issues more than one year old. ATLA Membership Directory issue: $20. Periodicals postage paid at Washington, DC, and additional mailing offices. Postmaster: Send address changes to TRIAL ATLA, P.O. Box 3717, Washington, DC 20027-0217.