Hearsay.

"The evidence was brought back to the police station, and the cops are eating the doughnuts."

Sergeant ROBERT SIMMONDS of the Swatara Township, Pennsylvania, sheriff's office. Someone stole a Krispy Kreme delivery truck; the driver had left the truck's back doors open, allowing the truck's contents to tumble out. Police officers simply followed the trail of breakfast pastries to find it.

"You don't know if saying his name conjures him up, but who wants to take the risk?"

BARBARA CHAPMAN, who lives on Satan Wood Drive in Howard County, Maryland. Neighborhood residents are petitioning the county to have the street's name legally changed.

"They were whoopee cushions for the feet."

BRYAN THOMAS of Goosebumps Products, Inc., a Florida company that makes footwear. Goosebumps is suing a supplier for using the wrong type of gel to manufacture a shoe lining. The gel makes the shoes emit a flatulence-like noise every time the wearer takes a step.

"It's a pretty straightforward case for us, since this time, the thieves actually reported the robbery."

ASGER LARSEN, superintendent of police in Copenhagen, Denmark. Two burglars came out of a house they'd just robbed to find that a passerby had stolen the keys to their getaway car. They promptly called the police, who arrested them for breaking and entering.

From newspaper and wire reports