Healthy Parenting Styles

Parenting is an instinctive process, but is often colored by the types of parenting styles that the father and mother have been exposed to themselves. The emotional baggage they bring into their marriage usually has a role to play in all their relationships. Despite this, most parents are keen on doing their best for their children, something every child instinctively recognizes. Hence whichever types of parenting styles, according to the book, that the child receives, the inherent bond of love is the strongest governing factor.

One of the most common types of parenting styles is smothering by the mother and criticism by the father. The mother tries to spoon feed her children at every occasion, and is overly concerned about their increasing need for independence as they grow older. On the other hand, the children can do no right in the eyes of the father, who constantly criticizes their appearance, behavior and performance. This is often a throwback back on the insecurities and problems faced by the parents while they were growing up. An overly critical parent may be reacting to stress at work, or other inter-personal relationships, including with the spouse.

Children, who are raised by a smothering mother and over critical father, may react in different ways. This can either make the children manipulative or, if they recognize that their parents actually want the best for them, make them stronger. They can respond to these two contrary types of parenting styles constructively. Instead of growing up manipulating the mother and resenting the father, the children can face up to the father''s criticism and improve themselves or confront his remarks positively. They can indulge in their mother''s over-protectiveness, or learn to take it lightly, and gently chide her for it.

However, not all children respond in this healthy manner, even within the same family. Some grow up as bullies and sullen people who cannot face a real challenge in life. These are options that children face while growing up, and their emotional growth really depends on their response to the types of parenting styles they have experienced. Differing circumstances may result in differing types of parenting styles, but finally it is the various influences during the formative that make a child into the adult he or she becomes.

There are always other influences during the growing years, such as teachers, peers and often neighbors, grandparents, and other relatives. The children who recognize their parents'' underlying sincerity, however misguided and misrepresented it may have been, can grow up strong and tolerant.

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