HER HEART WILL GO ON; SWITCHBLADE KITTENS GENERATE `TITANIC' INTEREST.

Byline: Fred Shuster Daily News Music Writer

It's the funniest song parody you may never hear.

Switchblade Kittens' punky girl-centric version of ``My Heart Will Go On'' - Celine Dion's multimillion-selling love theme from ``Titanic'' - currently is in the hands of lawyers who must work out fair use rights before the inspired high-concept cover version can be issued to commercial radio.

The idea for the parody came to Switchblade Kittens' leader, bassist and singer Drama Mahaffey-Arthur, 22, who started the quartet about a year ago.

``I heard Celine Dion's version on the radio so many times it was driving me nuts, so I decided we had to make a joke out of it,'' Mahaffey-Arthur said. ``We did it for a laugh, to crack ourselves up. It needed to be done because Celine was driving everybody crazy. People kept saying, `I just can't take that song one more time.' ''

Switchblade Kittens' fast and furious version includes a short spoken segment featuring members of the band playing the parts of Jack and Rose while the sound of rising water burbles in the background.

Jack: ``Hi. I'm a jobless card-playing drifter who likes to draw naked girls. Do you want to sleep with me?''

Rose: ``Are you kidding? I'm a rich socialite virgin who's engaged to be married. Of course I will.''

Mahaffey-Arthur said the spoken segment reflects the ``Titanic'' plot point that bothered her the most.

``I don't like what the movie is saying to girls,'' she said. ``I have friends who are single mothers and they ended up getting (pregnant) by some arty no-account guy like Jack who just didn't care. `Titanic' says if you have a life with money and privilege, go ahead and ruin it all by sleeping with this guy who plays cards, who has this seedy life. This is what they're saying to the girls who come to our shows - `Sure, jump into bed and don't think about the consequences.' ''

The Kittens' parody of ``My Heart Will Go On'' is available on the Internet(http://members.aol.com/greatbands/switchbladekittens/titanic/titanic.html).

Mahaffey-Arthur said the tune has sparked major label interest in the band and the fair-use problem may just be dropped into the lap of whatever record company signs the quartet or agrees to release the song nationally. ``My Heart Will Go On'' was written by James Horner and Will Jennings.

Among the issues that must be decided is whether the Kittens' ``Titanic'' parody would diminish the commercial value of Dion's original version. The first question, though, is whether the band recorded a parody at all.

``We're not sure whether it's a parody or a cover version, and that has to be established before we can proceed,'' Mahaffey-Arthur said. ``That's the issue. But I can tell you it was originally a joke. It was for us and our friends.''

The snafu hasn't stopped college stations in Louisiana, Florida, Texas and Alabama from downloading the tune and airing it.

``Louisiana State University has gone completely insane,'' the singer said. ``Students are e-mailing us all day.''

Linus Lee, music director at Louisiana State's KLSU-FM in Baton Rouge, said listeners are going ``ballistic'' over the song.

Switchblade Kittens is a high-concept guitarless group that features three bassists and a teen-age drummer - ``the weird name club,'' Mahaffey-Arthur says.

The band's ``token male'' is known as Pep.

``He's really one of those sensitive ponytail guys,'' she explained. ``He probably would've had a horrible time in a guy band. He sat in his room his whole life and played bass.''

Another bassist is Ariel Penn ``and she actually looks like the Little Mermaid,'' according to Mahaffey-Arthur.

The fourth Switchblade Kitten is 17-year-old drummer X Vilar - ``because she's from Argentina and her first name is hard to pronounce,'' the band leader said, adding that Vilar's dad is the janitor at Glendale High School, from which the drummer recently graduated.

One of the Kittens' songs is titled ``My Dad's a Janitor,'' written by Mahaffey-Arthur from Vilar's point of view.

Another original tune is ``Emily,'' a tribute to poet Emily Dickenson.

The lack of guitars is intentional.

``I had a lot of problems at the beginning because of the lead-guitarist mentality,'' said Mahaffey-Arthur, who until recently worked at a local music store. ``The guitarist dominates everything, writes everything, has three-minute solos in the middle of every song. I had to figure out a way where I didn't have to deal with these guitar personalities. I thought it would be so great if I could turn the bass players into guitarists because bassists have such mellow personalities.''

Also, Mahaffey-Arthur says, the Kittens don't smoke, drink or fool around with illegal substances.

``I wanted to start a punk band where no member takes drugs and nobody drinks - and I got it,'' she explained. ``And I wanted it to be mostly women and really nice people as well.''

Switchblade Kittens was in the midst of recording a six-song EP at Sound Asylum in Woodland Hills recently when ``Titanic''-fueled interest in the band skyrocketed.

``I called the one law student I knew in college, and he referred me to one of his friends, who's handling the case,'' Mahaffey-Arthur said.

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Photo

Photo: ``I heard Celine Dion's version on the radio so many times it was driving me nuts, so I decided we had to make a joke out of it,'' says lead singer Drama Mahaffey-Arthur, top left, with fellow Switchblade Kittens X Vilar, center; Pep, top right; and Ariel Penn, front.