Growing Up X.

by Ilyasah Shabazz with Kim McLarin, One World/Ballantine May 2002, $25.00, ISBN 0-345-44495-7

To read Ilyasah Shabazz's story about her life in Growing Up X, you would think she was just like any other young woman coming of age in suburban Westchester County, New York. But there's a difference between her and those of her generation: she is one of six daughters of the African-American icon, Malcolm X, and his much-loved widow, Betty Shabazz, a teacher and leader in her own right. In the eyes of many, this made her special, and an heir to their legacy.

"Being the daughter of Malcolm X and Dr. Betty Shabazz is a gift for which I am forever grateful" she writes in Growing Up X. However, early on Ilyasah decided it was best for her not to tell people of her parentage when she first met them. She says the expectations of those who knew her father and mother became a heavy burden. "Why were people surprised and sometimes disappointed--when they learned how normal my childhood was, how mainstream and privileged and integrated and utterly American?"

The divide between a life of Muslim devotion and the family's mainstream values will puzzle some readers. Betty Shabazz took the girls to the mosque every Sunday, and when they were visiting their grandparents in Philadelphia, they went to Friendship Baptist, a church Ilyasah says she loved, especially the praying and testifying and the singing of gospel music. "I loved the singing that went on" she writes. "I wanted to feel whatever powerful force was causing all of these people to sing and clap so heartily. I never did catch the spirit, but I always kept the hope."

In Growing Up X, Ilyasah also writes about her parents' marriage, although she was only two-years-old when her father was killed. She tells how Betty walked out on three occasions because Malcolm wouldn't allow her to work. Each time she came back. She also writes about the difficulties Betty endured as the widow of Malcolm and the sole support for six children.

Of her own life, Ilyasah describes how she was badly injured in a car crash shortly after graduating from the State University of New York at New Paltz. Later, she did walk-on work in Spike Lee's film about her father and lived in Phoenix for awhile, after she fell for an NBA player that she thought she might marry. She didn't. And she returned to New York 

However, the most poignant section of Ilyasah's story begins when she tells of her mother's struggle for life after the fire set by Betty Shabazz's grandson Malcolm, Quibillah's son. Disappointingly, the book ends at this juncture leaving much about Ilyasah and her family unanswered. Unfortunately Growing Up X only whets your appetite. A sequel to this memoir might offer more insight into this fascinating family.

--Elsie B. Washington is a writer and editor, and author of Uncivil Wars.