Give us the chance to be parents to our children; In association with Coventry Fostering Service.

Byline: By Warren Manger 

MUMS and dads across Coventry are being denied the chance to be loving parents because they have learning disabilities, it was claimed today.

Most parents will admit to the odd mistake or that they would do things differently given a second chance - but people with learning difficulties are often not given that chance, according to Coventry charity Grapevine.

Mia Docker, an advocate at Grapevine who has worked with many parents with learning difficulties, said: "A ten-week parenting course doesn't qualify you to be a good parent at the end of it.

"After 21 years of parenting I am still learning and at times I know I wasn't a good enough parent. But I believe that with the right support from the right people at the right time most parents with learning difficulties can be good enough parents."

Last year a desperate Coventry mother with learning disabilities disappeared with her two year-old daughter following a supervised visit.

Despite this Mia and fellow advocate Claire Nash believe social workers often take children away from parents with learning disabilities because it is the accepted thing to do, when it may be in the child and parents' best interests to keep the family together.

They believe it is sometimes also wrongly seen as the cheaper option.

Yet a custody battle to take the children into foster care can often run to hundreds of thousands of pounds - which they say is enough to provide parents with learning difficulties with the support they need for many years.

Claire said: "I think resources are a real problem - it is often seen as easier to go with the established procedures.

"I know the child's safety is paramount but they should consider the parent's rights and welfare too. It is often in the best interests of the parent and child for them to stay together."

Grapevine, based in Upper Spon Street, Spon End, helps people with learning disabilities in Coventry to live better lives. But staff there say that while many people with learning difficulties are leading fuller lives, some attitudes towards them are struggling to catch up.

The problem is compounded by the fact the social workers who test mothers' and fathers' parenting skills are experts on children and learning development, but not people with learning disabilities.

This means some parents shying away from the help they are entitled to because they are scared of losing their children, said Claire.

She said: "We have worked with mothers in the past who have become pregnant for a second time and are asked, 'Why would you put yourself through this all again?' "There seems to be an assumption that because they couldn't cope last time they won't be able to now which isn't necessarily true."

The Grapevine advocates support parents with learning disabilities while their parenting skills are being tested. They also offer help and advice with housing, employment and training.

For more details call 024 7663 1100 or visit www.grapevinecoventryandwarwickshire.co.uk

CAPTION(S):

HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE... Mia Docker (left) and fellow advocate Claire Nash provide support for people with learning difficulties through the Grapevine charity in Upper Spon Street, Coventry LS190208vine-01.JPG