GROUP HELPS AMPUTEES ADJUST : MEMBERS OFFER INSPIRATION TO ONE ANOTHER.

Byline: Karen Thacker Special to the Daily News

The first time Betty Duncan rejoined her square dance club after her right foot was amputated because of bone deterioration, she says her friends treated her like a glass doll.

``Finally I said, `Treat me like you always did - I'm not an invalid,'' she recalled.

Even if she fell, she got back up with her prosthetic foot and went on dancing.

Helping others to adjust and cope with losing a limb is the main reason the grandmother and retiree, agreed to head an amputee support group.

Listening and seeing that others can manage and lead fairly normal lives gives new amputees a lift and an incentive to learn and go on, she said.

``My motto is our life is what we make of it,'' said Duncan, who lost her right foot in 1987, then her right leg below the knee, and finally half of her left foot because of bone deterioration and phlebitis.

After an amputation, a doctor, nurse or therapist may tell a patient that he or she can overcome losing a limb and get on with life, Duncan said, but the patient often responds with ``Well, you have two good legs.''

``But if an amputee can walk in and say you'll be fine - that makes an impression,'' she said.

One of those examples in living as normal a life as possible is Shaio-Hung Harrison, who lost her left leg to cancer 17 years ago.

Harrison, who taught her herself to ride a bicycle all over again after losing her leg, puts it: ``I know I am an amputee but I don't see myself as an amputee.''

Even some of the customers visiting Harrison's Lancaster beauty salon, Hairport, aren't aware of the reason behind her slight limp.

``I had one client say, `Those shoes are so beautiful, but you need to wear something more comfortable,'' Harrison said, laughing at the comment and adding: ``I wish that was my problem.''

At one meeting, Harrison mentioned that she had gone to Disneyland.

``They say, `You walked the whole time?' and their expressions are like, `Wow

You can do that?' ''

At its meetings, the group brings in motivational speakers - such as two last month from a Riverside group called Amputees Are Able - and intends in the future to line up medical professionals who can talk about advances in prosthetics and other areas.

Because many amputees remain sensitive about their loss, the support group doesn't insist that members speak up at meetings.

``I think that people are sort of afraid to talk about it and vent their feelings,'' Duncan said. ``A lot of people get more from listening.''

The Amputee Support Group, sponsored by Valley Institute of Prosthetics and Orthotics, meets every three months for lunch at the Lancaster Elks Lodge. The next meeting is scheduled for February, but no date has been set. Anyone interested can call Duncan, group president, at [phone].