GRACE NOTE HAS GETTING OLDER, BECOMING A FATHER AND GAINING WISDOM MELLOWED HOLLYWOOD'S BAD BOY?

Byline: Bob Strauss Film Writer

Sean Penn is stirring up controversy again. And true to form, the media have pegged him as a combative contrarian, the same label they've been using since the married-to-Madonna days of punching out photographers and taking potshots at helicopters.

What is almost always overlooked in these reports, however, is that most of Penn's verbal barbs are delivered with conspiratorial smiles and heartfelt chuckles. Yeah, he gave me a variation on the line that's getting him in trouble all over the place - ``There are all these poisonous things out there, like Howard Stern and Bill O'Reilly and, to a lesser degree, Osama bin Laden'' - but laughs accompanied it.

The ironic thing is that Penn is currently feeling as warmly as he ever has, at least as far as acting in a Hollywood movie is concerned. ``I Am Sam,'' which will have wide sneak previews this weekend and go into general release on Jan. 25, marks an uncharacteristically lovable turn for the usually edgy, darkly serious thesp.

His title character is a single father with the intellect of a 7-year-old, who loses custody of his bright daughter, Lucy (Dakota Fanning), when her brainpower starts surpassing his. Sam is lucky enough to snag a hotshot attorney, Michelle Pfeiffer's Rita Harrison, to plead his case against the child-welfare establishment. But it's clear early on that the only thing that will reunite Sam and Lucy is the father's pure and overwhelming love.

Quite a departure for the actor whose gallery of ne'er-do-wells goes all the way back to his breakout role as the surfer dude Spicoli in 1982's ``Fast Times at Ridgemont High'' (which makes instructive viewing for anyone who doubts Penn has always had a strong sense of humor).

``This whole movie was just one of the best-feeling sets I've ever been on,'' Penn says of ``Sam,'' which was written by Kristine Johnson and Jessie Nelson, the latter of whom also directed. ``It was all women, and you know what? Women's world is a kinder, gentler world. I got to be part of that for a few weeks, and that was nice.''

Not coincidentally, Sam is being regarded as a kinder, gentler departure for the actor, who admittedly tends to gravitate toward harrowing movies in which he's played a wide variety of weasels, weak links and stone criminals. The list includes such titles as ``At Close Range,'' ``The Falcon and the Snowman,'' ``Casualties of War,'' ``Carlito's Way,'' ``Dead Man Walking,'' ``U-Turn'' and ``Sweet and Lowdown.''

``I didn't think about that at the time,'' he says of coming out cuddly for a change. ``But I have after the thing happened in New York and Washington. Not in terms of what may or may not turn out to be true about whether people need to be provoked about tough issues now or whether they need to feel good. Whatever the movies are meant to do right now, whatever the important medicine of movies is right now, I don't know for sure.

``But for myself, I felt I kind of lucked into this. In the comfort society that we lived in up until Sept. 11, I felt that the only good writers were guys who were finding their own darkness in some way, and the rest of it was fluff about fluff. So, to have coincidentally gotten a script that was a very loving story, and have that be what I have coming out after that thing happened ... I'm much happier to have this coming out now than, say, 'Dead Man Walking.' Just in terms of the spirit of it, not the politics.''

According to Pfeiffer, her co-star could not have been more enthusiastically infused with that spirit.

``I didn't really know what to expect,'' she says. ``I mean, I knew that Sean was brilliant and I'd always wanted to work with him. But just because someone is brilliant doesn't mean that they're going to be pleasant to work with. But he was just such a joy as a person and also as an actor, so generous and so present. He really made my job so easy, and he's so incredibly fun-loving.

``It's true! It's really true,'' Pfeiffer adds, following a skepticism-filled break in the conversation.

Besides the generally nurturing atmosphere on the set, Penn enjoyed the company of some unlikely collaborators, whose presence also demanded he stay on his best behavior. Brad Allan Silverman and Joseph Rosenberg play two of Sam's mentally challenged buddies in the movie. The actors are associated with L.A. Goal, a nonprofit organization that provides services for the developmentally disabled.

Asked if he experienced any remarkable difference between the usual run of actors and working with Rosenberg and Silverman, Penn cracks, ``Not really, except that they were generally sweeter.

``They were just terrific,'' he adds. ``They were so enthusiastic about it, and so professional. And for me, I was always feeling the grace of God there.''

Then there was dealing with the pint-size Fanning. Though Penn and his wife, actress Robin Wright Penn, have two children of their own, he's among the few actors who have not had much on-the-job experience with someone else's kids.

``That was a big challenge,'' Penn admits. ``Dakota's a terrific kid, but still, there's a breaking-in period. And kids tend to be still in touch with the spontaneity that we all search to create.''

Even Penn's detractors must be interested in the creative process of one of the best actors of his generation. And everyone wants to know what goes into a character like Sam.

He tries to oblige but - dead serious when it comes to his craft - can only go so far.

``With a character whose foundation is a certain innocence, there are so many things that you draw on, from your children, from your own childhood, from the guys who have these disabilities,'' he explains. ``But it's very hard to pin it down; you're making choices, and the things that come out of your personal life you use, more or less, without thinking about them. So they're never something you can talk about later because you never thought about which ones they were. And it's bad to talk about it later; it's terrible to investigate and expose that stuff. So that's why I keep saying that the acting choices are the same process with somebody like this as with anyone else.''

However he got to it, Penn's performance is considered a likely candidate for Oscar consideration. The actor has been nominated twice before, for ``Dead Man Walking'' and ``Sweet and Lowdown.'' He declined to campaign for the prize each time, and is well-known among reporters as a scathingly entertaining critic of the whole, evermore hype-driven awards process.

So, how does he feel about his chances this year?

``I have nothing to say about the Oscars,'' Penn carefully explains, a chastened little curl on his lips. ``I get everybody so upset when I do.''

It's pointed out that ads are appearing in the trades touting his ``I Am Sam'' performance.

``I have nothing to say about the Oscars,'' he repeats, smiling more broadly.

So, you wouldn't object to being nominated again?

``I have nothing to say about the Oscars, Bob,'' he declaims one more time, now laughing heartily.

He's trying to be good. Really.

``I've found myself having become, sort of, professionally the Minister of Complaint,'' Penn finally confesses. ``I'm just bored with myself talking about it.''

Maybe the relatively positive reception that Penn's third directing effort, ``The Pledge,'' enjoyed last year has had something to do with that. Penn has always maintained that he prefers writing and directing to acting, and still does, though most fans feel the opposite way about his work.

And it can probably be honestly said that many who profess outrage about some of Penn's statements wouldn't really want him to be any other way. To make 'em happy, Penn gets a little more honest about how he really feels in regard to the great talent he sometimes seems to dismiss.

``Generally speaking, I think the acting business is tremendously disappointing,'' he says, getting on a familiar roll despite himself. ``You're dependent on so many people, not just on the creative side but on the business side. Actors work really, really hard; harder - and I say this as somebody who has directed and produced and written things - than any other job in the field. That's because of the intangible parts of acting. When you give that much to something. ...

``You know, I didn't get into this to just be part of some dog-and-pony show. When you see what is successful generally, I just think it's worse than terrible. It's so, so, so degrading, most of it, that it's stupid. I start to feel like I'm living a stupid life.''

No grins with that rant. But however angry Penn might get, there is a lot of love there.

It seems, in fact, to be the core motivation. And that's no act.

``I love acting as a craft,'' he confesses with utter sincerity. ``When it's great, it gets me so excited, seeing actors finding things that our lives are about. I get very stimulated by that.''

CAPTION(S):

3 photos

Photo:

(1 -- cover -- color) Into the light

Gentle `I Am Sam' role offers tough guy Sean Penn a lesson on life

(2) Mentally challenged Sam (Sean Penn) shares a quiet moment with daughter Lucy (Dakota Fanning) in ``I Am Sam.''

(3) `Just because someone is brilliant doesn't mean that they're going to be pleasant to work with. But he was just such a joy as a person and also as an actor, so generous and so present. He really made my job so easy, and he's so incredibly fun-loving.'

Michelle Pfeiffer

on working with Penn in ``I Am Sam''