GENTLE WARRIOR ACTRESS WON'T ALLOW BREAST CANCER TO STOP HER.Byline: Evan Henerson Staff Writer One bit of news coverage in the aftermath of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks struck a chord with Wendie Jo Sperber, a segment to which the Valley actress and breast cancer survivor could instantly relate. ``I think it was on 'Dateline,' '' said Sperber. ``They were at the ballpark, and it was some sort of a memorial. They were interviewing people, and people were saying it's just nice to know we're not alone. All the other people have gone through what we've gone through.''' ``It reminded me of this,'' said Sperber, referring to weSPARK, the nonprofit cancer support center she founded in Sherman Oaks. ``I hate to use the 'poor me, why me,' but when you're isolated and you're scared to tell anybody you're depressed today, there's this place you can come and talk to people your own age, your peers. You're not alone. Everybody in this room has had those feelings and those fears.'' Sperber didn't have that room when she needed it. So she built it. Drawing on feelings of anger and frustration, she created an environment of caring and serenity. The actress, who doesn't golf, organized a celebrity golf tournament. The woman who calls herself ``the little dreamer,'' without a head for figures or methods, is now the founder of a bustling nonprofit center. Sperber is the spark in weSPARK, which is already providing services to more than 200 guests well in advance of its Nov. 8 grand opening. ``I guess I'm a spoiled little brat who doesn't like to hear the word 'no,' '' says Sperber, who grew up in Northridge. As in, ``No, the type of support services support services Psychology Non-health care-related ancillary services–eg, transportation, financial aid, support groups, homemaker services, respite services, and other services you're looking for Looking for In the context of general equities, this describing a buy interest in which a dealer is asked to offer stock, often involving a capital commitment. Antithesis of in touch with. don't exist nearby. You'll have to drive to Santa Monica Santa Monica (săn`tə mŏn`ĭkə), city (1990 pop. 86,905), Los Angeles co., S Calif., on Santa Monica Bay; inc. 1886. Tourism and retailing are important, and the city has motion-picture, biotechnology, and software industries. .'' Uh-uh, said Sperber, who began laying the ground work for a facility to be built in the Valley and organized informal support sessions until the center opened. As in, ``No, you shouldn't publicly out yourself as a breast cancer survivor. That's career suicide.'' So what, said Sperber, who played herself on a breast cancer-related ``Murphy Brown'' story arc, and did the talk-show circuit as well. ``It just made me really upset and angry,'' said Sperber, who has been featured in such films as ``I Wanna wan·na Informal 1. Contraction of want to: You wanna go now? 2. Contraction of want a: You wanna slice of pie? Hold Your Hand,'' ``Back to the Future'' and ``Love Affair,'' as well as the 1980-84 TV series ``Bosom Buddies Bosom Buddies is an American sitcom starring Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari created by Robert L. Boyett, Thomas L. Miller and Chris Thompson. It ran from 1980 to 1982 on ABC. .'' ``I knew so many AIDS victims, and I finally got a taste of what they go through. I was being discriminated against, and it was like, 'I don't care
"Don't Care" is a 1994 (see 1994 in music) single by American death metal band Obituary. if I don't work again.' '' That's Wendie Jo Sperber the warrior talking, the 43-year-old single mother of two who, when doctors found a half-centimeter tumor tumor: see neoplasm. in July 1998, immediately decided, ``I'm not going to die.'' A mastectomy mastectomy (măstĕk`təmē), surgical removal of breast tissue, usually done as treatment for breast cancer. There are many types of mastectomy. In general, the farther the cancer has spread, the more tissue is taken. and a cycle of hormonal chemotherapy took care of the cancer, but finding emotional and spiritual support was trickier. At UCLA UCLA University of California at Los Angeles UCLA University Center for Learning Assistance (Illinois State University) UCLA University of Carrollton, TX and Lower Addison, TX , Sperber found herself in a group of women who were post- menopausal (``I could not relate at all,'' she said), and because she had received her treatment and surgery at another facility, she was charged for support services. The Wellness Community in Santa Monica was a better match, but it was far away. ``When you're sick and a single mom, that's a schlep schlep or schlepp also shlep Slang v. schlepped also shlepped, schlep·ping or schlepp·ing also shlep·ping, schleps or schlepps also shleps v.tr. ,'' Sperber says. So she organized the first Wendie Jo Sperber Celebrity Golf Classic, designed to raise money for a Wellness Community to be established in the Valley. When the tournament did not meet expectations and the Wellness Community opted not to open a Valley branch, Sperber decided to create the place herself. Before securing a home on Ventura Boulevard Ventura Boulevard is one of the primary east-west thouroughfares in the San Fernando Valley; as it was originally a part of the El Camino Real (the trail between Spanish missions), Ventura Boulevard is the oldest route in the San Fernando Valley. It was also U.S. between Woodman and Fulton Avenues, she held early weSPARK meetings in her living room. The acronym acronym: see abbreviation. A word typically made up of the first letters of two or more words; for example, BASIC stands for "Beginners All purpose Symbolic Instruction Code. SPARK (which stands for Support, Prevention, Acceptance, Recovery, Knowledge) was already taken. Sperber added the ``we'' - as in ``We spark. We ignite.'') Tears and fear were occasionally on the menu, but more often than not, Sperber and fellow ``gentle warriors'' got together to share experiences and laugh. ``She can light up a room. She's just so positive and happy and loves life,'' says Carrie Ameen, 27, an actress and breast cancer survivor who lives in Studio City. ``She's just the kind of person who would open up a cancer support center. She's created an atmosphere where you can go in and laugh at absurdity and also cry at the sadness.'' For children, too There is nothing clinical or even medical about the modest weSPARK headquarters. The furniture is eclectic and a touch funky. The fridge is communal. A central counter top contains reference material, resources and the beginnings of a library. A small table and play area is the domain of the ``wee''SPARK-ers, the children of cancer survivors Cancer survivors are those individuals with cancer of any type, current or past, who are still living. The National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship (NCCS) pioneered the definition of survivor as from the time of diagnosis and for the balance of life, a person diagnosed with or those who have the disease themselves. Helping her 15-year-old son and 12-year-old daughter work through a difficult time made Sperber realize that weSPARK would need to offer services to children as well. ``This little boy got to me. He was 11 years old, also the age of my daughter,'' recalled Sperber. ``I met him in the Valley and saw a shunt To divert, switch or bypass. in his arm; I asked him if he was having chemo che·mo n. Chemotherapy or a chemotherapeutic treatment. . He just lit up because someone was talking to Noun 1. talking to - a lengthy rebuke; "a good lecture was my father's idea of discipline"; "the teacher gave him a talking to" lecture, speech rebuke, reprehension, reprimand, reproof, reproval - an act or expression of criticism and censure; "he had to him. ``I thought, 'It's still like this C word, this terrible thing, and people are afraid of it.' So it was important for me to include children too.'' Envisioning a youth and recreation center infused with principles from 12-step programs, Sperber basically created the environment that she never got to experience while going through treatment and rehabilitation rehabilitation: see physical therapy. . The weekly calendar includes professional counseling, support groups, meditation, guided imagery Guided Imagery Definition Guided imagery is the use of relaxation and mental visualization to improve mood and/or physical well-being. Purpose and seminars on alternative medicine. Guests who are apprehensive about an upcoming doctor's appointment can have a weSPARK medical appointment buddy accompany them. All services are free. ``It's bittersweet bittersweet, name for two unrelated plants, belonging to different families, both fall-fruiting woody vines sometimes cultivated for their decorative scarlet berries. ,'' says Sperber. ``It's so neat to know we have it, but it's oh-so-overwhelming how many people need it.'' ``I think Wendie Jo's vision was not just a support group but a support environment,'' added Shelly Blechman, chief operating officer Chief Operating Officer (COO) The officer of a firm responsible for day-to-day management, usually the president or an executive vice-president. of the Women's Information Network Against Breast Cancer. The Covina-based organization pioneered the development of a postage stamp postage stamp, government stamp affixed to mail to indicate payment of postage. The term includes stamps printed or embossed on postcards and envelopes as well as the adhesive labels. to benefit breast cancer research. Sperber has worked with WIN and its founder Elizabeth Mullen. Blechman envisions future partnerships with weSPARK. ``I don't think there are really a lot of places where people can go and perhaps get this kind of support,'' said Blechman. No facing this alone Over the course of her weSPARK endeavor, Sperber learned that delegating isn't cheating. A trusted friend organized the just-concluded third annual celebrity golf tournament, and weSPARK's director is another Sperber: Wendie Jo's older sister, Michelle, a psychotherapist psy·cho·ther·a·pist n. An individual, such as a psychiatrist, psychologist, psychiatric nurse, or psychiatric social worker, who practices psychotherapy. trained in trauma. The two sisters, always close, have never followed similar career paths. Now, working side by side, the Sperbers say the early days of weSPARK have been like ``playing house.'' A third sibling, brother Richard, is on weSPARK's board of directors. Seeing the sisters together - during a recent interview at the weSPARK house, is to witness a study in contrasts: Wendie Jo, the slightly kooky dreamer, and Michelle, the methodical planner, the organizer. Different personalities, common vision. ``The truth is Wendie, with her great personality and her connections and friends is able to raise an incredible amount of funds with the help of an incredible group of volunteers who all love her,'' Michelle says. ``She got a fully loaded Ford Escape to auction off for the golf tournament. That's a pretty good thing for making a phone call.'' Wendie Jo has equal praise for Michelle. ``I'm blessed that Michelle stepped in,'' Wendie Jo continues. ``We never could technically have done the things she's done. It would have been another year at least before we got to this point.'' In an ideal situation, weSPARK's founder could work more and delegate less. She'd have the energy to match her activity level and she wouldn't be quite so tired. No time to give up A month ago, Wendie Jo Sperber learned that the cancer had returned and spread to her bones and lung. ``It's serious this time,'' says Wendie Jo. ``It's not going to leave my body, but we're trying to put it in remission and try to keep it in remission long enough for one scientist to find a cure. So that's where I'm at. Nothing scares me because I've had this group. They got through it and it's so interesting to see, not knowing then how much that helped me. They're all such ... I don't like calling them survivors. I like calling them gentle warriors.'' weSPARK What: A nonprofit cancer support center. Where: 13522 Ventura Blvd., Sherman Oaks Information: Call (818) 906-3022 or log on to www.wespark.org. CAPTION(S): 4 photos Photo: (1 -- cover -- color) Igniting HOPE Sisters Wendie Jo and Michelle Sperber create the Valley's weSPARK center, where cancer patients can find much-needed support (2) Cancer survivor Carrie Ameen, right, speaks with counselor Marie Heller-Ritz at the weSPARK support center in Sherman Oaks (3) Actress and cancer survivor Wendie Jo Sperber (4) Fresh flowers are arranged to greet visitors at the weSPARK cancer support center in Sherman Oaks. Tina Burch/Staff Photographer |
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