FIRST MISTAKE: ASKING HIS WIFE.

Byline: NORMAN CHAD The NFL 

Bobby Ross, like Dick Vermeil before him, ``burned out.''

(Unlike the Vermeil case, we hope broadcasting doesn't beckon.)

Ross, who always appeared as if he were passing a kidney stone on the sideline, never took kindly or softly to losing. So, after a humiliating 23-8 loss to the Dolphins, he wrote a letter of resignation Monday to Lions owner William Clay Ford.

Whatever happened to giving two weeks' notice?

Those of us familiar with football and life grimaced when we heard Ross, dismayed after the Dolphins loss, close his news conference Sunday by saying, ``I'm gonna have to go home and reflect on some things and talk them over with my wife.''

First of all, folks, there's only one woman associated with the NFL with whom you'd want to speak if you're in that gloomy state of mind: Julie Romanowski.

Ross was one of those coaches consumed by the job. I guarantee you, when Ross led Georgia Tech to the collegiate national title in 1990, he couldn't even tell you he was on a college campus; all he knew was that he coached a football team.

This single-mindedness doesn't always pay off: In Ross' 3 1/2 years in Detroit, he was 27-30, plus 0-2 in the playoffs. His more casual predecessor, my main man Wayne Fontes, was 34-30, plus 0-3 in the playoffs, in his final four years in Detroit.

Moral to the story: Whether you sweat it or swing it, you always get knocked out by a better team.

As always, the following point-spread picks should not be used as the basis for any actual cash wager:

--Bears at Bills (-7 1/2): Hoping to settle differences, Bills QBs Doug Flutie and Rob Johnson worked on painting-by-numbers together Tuesday . . . Bills G Jamie Nails hopes to parlay DWI arrest Monday into 2028 presidential bid. Pick: Bears.

--Eagles at Steelers (-3 1/2): One cautionary note about my Team of Destiny - having Kevin Gilbride call your plays is like having a podiatrist operate on your heart . . . This could be your Super Bowl XXXV preview. Pick: Steelers.

--Raiders at Broncos (-3): Raiders K Sebastian Janikowski missed Chiefs game with ``bacterial infection in left foot.'' Ya, right. You know, when I used to call in sick, at least I'd do that fake-cough thing on the phone. Pick: Broncos.

--Dolphins (-5) at Chargers: Dartmouth grad Jay Fiedler convinced Dolphins teammates he knew words to the electoral college fight song . . . How unpopular is Chargers' Ryan Leaf? The United Way turned down his support. Pick: Dolphins.

--Saints (-2) at Panthers: ``Dear Uncle Man: If your picks don't pick up, you can forget about Thanksgiving at our house this year. Love, Your nieces Jennifer, 17, and Lisa, 15. P.S. Panthers are a lock.''

--Patriots (-7) at Browns: How does Carmen Policy get around the salary cap? When he's adding up stuff, he doesn't carry over numbers . . . Chris Palmer on waiting list for a Browns touchdown and flu vaccine. Pick: Browns.

--Bengals at Cowboys (-9): Which of these three men most overstayed their welcome with their respective franchises? a) Alberto Fujimori, b) Slobodan Milosevic, c) Bruce Coslet. Pick: Cowboys.

--Seahawks at Jaguars (-7 1/2): Hoping he'd take the bait, coach Mike Holmgren last week told QB Jon Kitna the Seahawks' next home game was at Mount Rainier. Pick: Jaguars.

--Cardinals at Vikings (-13): FBI's anti-terrorist unit called into Phoenix based on Cardinals owner Bill Bidwill's threat that he might not move the team. Pick: Vikings.

--Ravens at Titans (-4): Always a step ahead of the curve, offensive stylist Brian Billick has converted entire Ravens audible system to Morse code. Pick: Titans.

--Packers at Buccaneers (-8 1/2): Packers QB Brett Favre can hear play- calling in Spanish by turning his helmet radio to the SAP channel Pick: Packers.

--Rams (-2) at Giants: Saying Rams and Giants are both 7-2 teams is like saying caviar and Cheez-Its are both finger foods . . . Giants: Today 7-2, tomorrow 8-8. Pick: Rams.

--Jets at Colts (-5 1/2): Jets' Al Groh only NFL coach to mark days of the week on underwear . . . Jets: Today 6-3, tomorrow 8-8. Pick: Colts.

--Falcons at Lions (-8): Falcons QB Chris Chandler will play only if he accepts collision waiver. Pick: Lions.

--Chiefs (-3 1/2) at 49ers: Bill Walsh's latest project: Adapting the West Coast Offense to contract bridge. Pick: Chiefs.

--Last week: 7-7-1.

--Season record: 72-67-3.