Embracing an attitude of gratitude.

The last thing I expected to feel after being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis was gratitude. And yet, after the initial shock, that's exactly what I experienced. I felt grateful to finally have an explanation for my mysterious symptoms. I felt grateful that I didn't have a terminal illness. I felt grateful that my husband was willing to help me cope with this lifelong challenge.

Prior to my diagnosis, I took my physical abilities for granted. I just assumed that I would jump out of bed each day and be able to tackle the tasks at hand. Now, when I first open my eyes in the morning, I do a mental scan of my body to see what parts are waking up with me. Do I have feeling in my legs? Will I be able to make it to the bathroom independently? Will I be able to make it to the bathroom at all? If the answers to these questions are yes, then I'm grateful.

When we're forced to live with a chronic illness, it's easy to lament our losses. As we constantly adjust to the changes in our minds and bodies, it's tempting to focus on what isn't working, but this simply creates further frustration. I'm not suggesting that we ignore the sadness and pain that MS can cause, but once these feelings are acknowledged and released, the spirit can begin to heal by actively focusing on what's going right. Our ability to live a fulfilling life, despite our disease, will arise directly from our appreciation of each function we're able to retain and each new skill we develop that helps us adapt to change. Making the commitment to embrace gratitude positively influences our world view and how others perceive us. It softens our losses and enhances our gains.

Gratitude is a coping skill 

Cultivating an attitude of gratitude is one of the many skills you can practice to help lessen the impact MS has on your overall sense of well-being. So how do you deliberately become truly grateful and how can choosing this mindset transform your perspective?

Try a gratitude list

When I've found myself feeling hopeless or facing another loss, I make a list of all the things I'm grateful for. If you can, find a quiet place to sit and relax while you do this.

This list may help you to remember the simple gifts you receive every day. Carry it with you. I've learned that even the smallest pleasures can be appreciated when I allow myself a moment to be aware of what I have.

Give thanks

Another simple way to practice gratitude is to give thanks before each meal. Acknowledging that I'm grateful for the food I'm about to receive makes me feel nourished and cared for in a profound way.

Shift your attention

Sometimes we all have to slow down intentionally before we're able to genuinely appreciate the many positive aspects of our lives. If you find yourself feeling critical or negative during the day, take a deep breath and redirect your attention to something for which you're grateful. Notice if your body becomes more relaxed and your breathing more steady. Tune in to how your attitude shifts when you focus on the sweetness in life. This is living consciously.

Make it a habit

Gratitude is a life skill and, like all skills, the more I do it the easier it is to do. Paying attention to thoughts and feelings and making the decision to be grateful can ultimately guide emotions toward a healthier course. This is what I wish for everyone in the coming New Year.

Sample Gratitude List

* The sun is shining

* My cat is in my lap

* I have tasty food in the refrigerator

* My house is warm

* My best friend is coming over for tea

* My pain is only at a level three today

* I have a good book to read

Allison Shadday, LCSW, is a psychotherapist who was diagnosed with MS in 1994. Her book, MS and Your Feelings: Handling the Ups and Downs of Multiple Sclerosis, has just been published by Hunter House. To order, go to Amazon.com.