DAY CARE STUDY OFFERS DISCOURAGING WORDS : WORKING MOMS WHO HAVE FEW OPTIONS GET ADDED GUILT.

Byline: Lori Moody Daily News Staff Writer

Susan Ellis is a mom who works outside the home and would like to shed the guilt. But a study released Friday on the effects of day care on young children just added to her burden.

``If you don't have an option, the last thing you want to do is read an article that's going to make you feel worse,'' said Ellis, 33, of Glendale. ``They make it so generalized.

``There's a lot more to working moms than they get credit for,'' she said.

The federally funded study, involving more than 1,300 children 3 and under, found that language and cognitive development did not suffer in children in day care.

But the study showed that the more time a child spends in day care, the less sensitive the mother is toward the child and the less interactive the child is with mom - which could spell trouble later on, say researchers.

In a time when two incomes are a necessity for many families, the study did little but create confusion for some working parents struggling with the subject of day care.

``It's always disturbing when you hear about studies about child care because you want to do the best for your child,'' said Lynn Feldman Weiss, 40, director of public relations for American Movie Classics and mother of a 7-1/2-month-old son.

She has someone come into her West Hollywood home to watch her child while she is at work.

``It just makes me more aware of the time I spend with my child outside of day care is so much more important,'' Feldman Weiss said. ``I just keep thinking quality, quality, quality.''

Ellis, a childbirth educator at Saint Joseph Medical Center in Burbank, says she feels confident in the care her 20-month-old son, Nicholas, is getting from his baby sitter, who is more like a member of the family.

Her daughter, Lauren, 4, is now in preschool but began going to the baby sitter when she was 4 months old.

``It was really hard,'' Ellis said. ``I knew (the baby sitter) so it wasn't as hard as dropping her off at a big day care center. I knew she would get a lot of attention . . . That was the next best thing to me staying home.''

As a single parent, Christine Amoroso, 41, an inventory buyer for an electronic equipment manufacturer, has no choice but day care.

Her oldest daughter, Kendra, 16, went to Devonshire Preschool & Infant Care in Chatsworth as a youngster. Her daughter Devon, 4, attends there now. A third child, Nicholas, 12, stays at a neighbor's house until mom gets home.

``(Devon) has the best of all worlds: she plays with the children at school, stays with her grandma in the afternoon and, when we go home in the evening we sing, chat and play pretend games in the car,'' Amoroso said.

Daphne Dorfmann, 33, of North Hollywood, has been dropping her 7-month-old son, Luke, off at a licensed day care provider's home before going to work since he was 3 months old. And she has yet to see any ill effects.

``When I walk in the door, my son knows it's me immediately,'' she said. ``He smiles, flails his arms around. I spend as much as I can in the morning and in the evening with him.''

Dorfmann said she misses her son constantly but believes that if she must send him to day care, at least he is comfortable with the caretaker and gaining social skills being around other children.

``They learn the alphabet, watch educational programs, play games and learn to speak pretty early by being around each other,'' she said. ``I hope that influence will rub off on my son. I think there's something to be gained by that.''