Confronting Canada: couples who have tied the knot in Canada are forcing U.S. government officials and private businesses to grapple with the reality of same-sex marriage.

Canadian gay couple Kevin Bourassa and Joe Varnell were on their way to a civil rights conference in Georgia when the newlyweds were confronted by U.S. opposition to their legal relationship. Having successfully sued the Canadian government for the right to marry last year, and having had their marriage ratified by an appellate decision in June, the Toronto couple dutifully filled out the U.S. Customs form for a two-person family.

But when customs officials demanded that Bourassa, and Varnell fill out separate forms as single people, they refused and went home. "It's an invasion of the charter rights and values that we have in our country," Bourassa said. "We simply ask that [the United States] recognize a marriage that their neighbors to the north do. A little piece of our dignity has been chipped away."

The incident is part of a growing body of evidence that Canada's new rights are forcing U.S. government agencies and businesses to confront the changing realities of same-sex marriage. Because the right to marry in Canada is not limited to Canadian gay couples, many U.S. couples have been traveling there to get married, and that trend is having an impact here at home. And while many U.S. businesses and major daily newspapers have embraced gay marriage with services and announcements, some are still struggling with the issue. Seattle couple Tom Butts and Scott Carter, for example, were planning their October marriage in Vancouver, Canada, when Seattle design and printing company Starfish Creative refused to print their wedding invitations because, according to Butts, owner Patty Pauls objected to gay marriage. Pauls, who did not return calls requesting comment, now faces legal action because Seattle law prohibits businesses from discriminating based on sexual orientation.

"I understand that she has her own belief system, and I don't want her to change that, but if she wants to work in the city of Seattle, she needs to abide by the laws of the city," Butts said.

The effect of Canadian gay marriage on the United States is significant to the overall debate, said Evan Wolfson of the New York City-based Freedom to Marry. "The cultural impact is very powerful and important." Legal action and diplomatic pressure from Canadian officials could facilitate change in this country, he added. And while change may be slow to come, Wolfson predicted, eventually Canada's gay marriage reality will become our own.