CodeWeavers Issues Ten Step Program for Microsoft Recovery and Computing Nirvana.CodeWeavers CEO (1) (Chief Executive Officer) The highest individual in command of an organization. Typically the president of the company, the CEO reports to the Chairman of the Board. : "Onward to battle!! Hold the mayo, please." ST. PAUL St. Paul as a missionary he fearlessly confronts the “perils of waters, of robbers, in the city, in the wilderness.” [N.T.: II Cor. 11:26] See : Bravery , Minn. -- Feeling powerless because Microsoft Windows See Windows. (operating system) Microsoft Windows - Microsoft's proprietary window system and user interface software released in 1985 to run on top of MS-DOS. Widely criticised for being too slow (hence "Windoze", "Microsloth Windows") on the machines available then. has rendered your computer impotent? Deluded into thinking you have to install Windows just because it came with your new computer? Looking for Looking for In the context of general equities, this describing a buy interest in which a dealer is asked to offer stock, often involving a capital commitment. Antithesis of in touch with. answers to this problem but are so far down in computing purgatory you don't know Don't know (DK, DKed) "Don't know the trade." A Street expression used whenever one party lacks knowledge of a trade or receives conflicting instructions from the other party. where to turn? CodeWeavers, Inc., a leading developer of software products that turn Mac OS X and Linux into Windows-compatible operating systems Operating systems can be categorized by technology, ownership, licensing, working state, usage, and by many other characteristics. In practice, many of these groupings may overlap. , today introduced a ten-step program empowering Windows users to overcome the destructive and debilitating de·bil·i·tat·ing adj. Causing a loss of strength or energy. Debilitating Weakening, or reducing the strength of. Mentioned in: Stress Reduction computer problems resulting from either their habitual use of Microsoft operating systems The following is a list of Microsoft operating systems. For the codenames that Microsoft gave their operating systems, see Microsoft codenames. Before Windows
"Too often today, the spiritual side of computing gets swept under Microsoft's trillion dollar Persian rug," said CodeWeavers' chief executive officer and staff bhagwan, Jeremy White, from the lotus position at a Jimmy John's See Jimmy John's Pipin' Hot Sandwiches for the hot dog establishment in Chadds Ford, PA. Jimmy John's is a franchised sandwich restaurant owned by Jimmy John Liautaud. restaurant down the street from CodeWeavers' headquarters. "We believe it's impossible to be a happy, self-fulfilled human being when so much time each week is spent cursing a computer screen. That's why we've created this simple ten-step program that empowers suffering souls around the world to rise-up and break Microsoft's iron shackles, allowing them to continue on the glorious path to computing Nirvana." For testimonials and action shots of White reading his 10 steps, visit http://www.codeweavers.com/10steps/. The CodeWeavers Ten Steps to Computing Nirvana 1. Admit you are powerless over Microsoft -- that your Windows computer has become unmanageable or that every computer available at retail will have Windows installed. 2. Come to believe that a power greater than yourself or Bill Gates (person) Bill Gates - William Henry Gates III, Chief Executive Officer of Microsoft, which he co-founded in 1975 with Paul Allen. In 1994 Gates is a billionaire, worth $9.35b and Microsoft is worth about $27b. could restore you to sanity. 3. Make a decision to turn your computer struggles over to the care of a new Macintosh or Linux computer system. 4. Take a searching and fearless moral inventory of your operating system and what applications are limiting you. 5. Admit to Bill Gates, to yourself, and to other desktop users the exact nature of your reliance on Windows just to run a few applications. 6. Become entirely ready to have CodeWeavers remove all barriers to running these applications on your new computer. 7. Humbly ask CodeWeavers to remove those barriers by letting you run your favorite Windows applications natively without a Windows license. 8. Make a list of all persons harmed as a result of these barriers, and make amends to them by sending them the link to the CodeWeavers website. 9. Make direct amends to such people wherever possible, especially when to do so would undermine Microsoft's efforts to rule the world of computing. 10. Have a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, carry this message to everyone you know, and practice these principles in all affairs. "Our country's founding fathers went as far as preserving the pursuit of happiness as an inalienable Not subject to sale or transfer; inseparable. That which is inalienable cannot be bought, sold, or transferred from one individual to another. The personal rights to life and liberty guaranteed by the Constitution of the United States are inalienable. right under our constitution," said White as he ordered a turkey and bacon sub before an electrified crowd of lunchtime diners at the Jimmy John's. "And I'll be damned if we'll stand around and watch this right die in the sacred realm of personal computing. I call on everyone stricken with this horrible affliction to follow our ten-step program. Onward to battle!! Hold the mayo, please." About CodeWeavers Founded in 1996 as a general software consultancy, CodeWeavers today focuses on the development of Wine--the core technology found in all of its CrossOver products. The company's goal is to bring expanded market opportunities for Windows software developers by making it easier, faster, and more painless to port Windows software to Linux. CodeWeavers is recognized as a leader in open-source Windows porting technology, and maintains development offices in Minnesota, the UK, and elsewhere around the world. The company is privately held. For more information about CodeWeavers, log on to www.codeweavers.com. |
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