Classic homestead blunders.

1. Underestimating the amount of cash it takes to live in rural poverty. Cows may eat free grass, but the cow, the fence, the barn, the milk pail and all the rest mean the milk certainly isn't free.

2. Getting an animal of any kind and then trying to figure out where to put it, what to feed it, and how to care for it.

3. Planting too much garden.

4. Planting too little garden.

5. Knowing little more about mechanics than where to put gas in the family jalopy--and buying a 20-year-old tractor and expecting to spend more time running it than fixing it.

6. Buying a scrub goat without finding out first if it produces milk.

7. Paying hundreds of dollars for a registered goat with a fine pedigree before finding out if it produces milk.

8. Moving to a farm and tearing down old buildings "to clean the place up"--before finding out if you'll find a use for the buildings--and before pricing new construction.

9. Thinking pigs or goats will stay where you want them simply because you put a fence around them.

10. Planting lots of zucchini.

11. Becoming so attached to animals the place becomes a zoo rather than a homestead.

12. Not having an extra incubator thermostat wafer and brooder lamp.

13. Leaving the milk records where the goats can reach them.

14. Putting geese in the garden to weed it.

15. Thinking since it's easy to sell a little milk, a few eggs, or a couple of rabbits, it'd be a snap to make a living from it.

16. Forgetting that septic tanks need periodic cleaning.

17. Believing the family dog "wouldn't think of harming a chicken or lamb."

18. Being "too busy" to take time out to enjoy life -- especially with your children.

19. Taking doomsayers too seriously -- or ignoring them completely.

20. Going into debt.

21. Not planting enough trees.

22. Starting a fire in the stove with the damper closed.

23. Leaving the draft open while you go out to do chores, and coming in to a cherry red stovepipe.

24. Not getting the cat spayed.

25. Putting off disbudding goat kids.

26. Putting up hay when it's too wet.

27. Not planting enough tomatoes to provide sauce for pizza, baked beans, stews, casseroles and juice through the winter.

28. Thinking you have enough firewood to last the winter, just because the pile looks so huge.

29. Going into homesteading thinking it will always be fun -- for both you and your family.

30. Trying to homestead without COUNTRYSIDE magazine. -- Jerry Belanger, September, 1981