Charity begins at home.

In a previous news stow in The Advocate, lesbian and gay organizations --including the Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Center--had their motives called into question for undertaking fund-raising activities linked to the death of Matthew Shepard. As the director of development at the center, I argued forcefully with our executive director and our policy and public affairs staff about the need to create the direct-mail piece that we sent to households of current and prospective donors. The piece was designed to inform donors about the services the L.A. Gay and Lesbian Center provides to address the needs brought into terrible relief by the tragic death of Matthew Shepard. Our services for young gay people and for people who have been victims of hate crimes are funded in large part by donations from individuals in the gay and lesbian community, and I am convinced that it is our responsibility to remind people when tragedies like this occur that there is an opportunity to respond in a concrete, constructive way.

As a professional fundraiser, I am flabbergasted, frankly, that anyone would see our efforts to respond as "disgusting," especially given that the growth of philanthropy in the gay and lesbian community over the past 20 years has been fueled by thousands of similar tragedies. Death from HIV/AIDS, suicide, substance abuse, and other tragedies in our community have motivated us to create a philanthropic infrastructure that is the envy of many.

We turned our grief into action, and we have not only created change but also inspired many of those who misunderstood or even hated us. Almost all of this important work has been funded through the generosity of gay men, lesbians, and their friends, and most of these people have been motivated to give because of their personal experience of concern or loss.

My instinct is that the reason people have reacted negatively to fundraising in response to Matthew's death is our real discomfort with fund-raising as an activity. As proud as we may be of what we have been able to accomplish as a community, we are ashamed that we have had to ask people for money to do it.

As a professional fund-raiser, I must admit that it offends me that there are those who consider what I do to be somehow unholy. I am proud that I have dedicated my life to raising money to allow others to provide critical services to those in need in the gay and lesbian community, and it hurts me deeply that people who have the skills to provide those services would feel driven to degrade me for the service that I provide.

Not everyone is motivated to support organizations through their time and energy, and, quite frankly, our organizations could not survive if volunteer hours were the only contributions. Though we are extremely fortunate at the center to have over 3,000 generous volunteers who provide over $1 million in donated services each year, there are other generous souls who prefer to financially support the vital and often life-saving work that organizations like the L.A. Gay and Lesbian Center provide. They should not be demonized, and neither should the women and men, both professionals and volunteers, who help solicit those donations.

The growing willingness of lesbians and gay men to give money to causes that personally touch them has resulted in more and better services being provided to an ever-increasing number of people in need. In addition, this giving has been the catalyst to a sense of community that is truly ennobling, providing a sense of pride and purpose we could hardly have anticipated or hoped for.

We have much to do to make this world a better place for lesbians and gay men. For a start, we can stop the name-calling of those who are dedicated to the same mission, and we can stop questioning their motives with no apparent inspiration other than self-righteousness. Leave that sin to those who started this fight in the first place.

McMullin is director of development at the Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Center.