COURSES EASIER THAN A 2-FOOT PUTT; CLINICS TEACH WOMEN TO `SPEAK SPORTS'.

Byline: James Hannah Associated Press 

It's the 18th hole, and you've got to roll in a slippery, 50-foot side-hill putt to land the biggest contract of your corporate career. As the seconds tick down, you know you have to complete that Hail Mary pass if you're going to get that signature on the dotted line.

Excuse me?

For the sports-impaired, life in the corporate world has always been tough. High-level executives strike deals on the golf course, corporate policy is hashed out at halftime, memos are riddled with lingo only a devoted sports fan could easily interpret.

There's one thing the ambitious up-and-comer can do: Learn how to speak sports.

So around the country, people are turning to clinics where they learn the lingo.

``Historically, men have been able to mix the pleasure of golf with the purpose of business,'' said marketing executive Barbara Simpson, 45. ``That is an option that should be readily available to women.''

She took a $30, one-day, women-only ``Golf Networking'' course from Peter Titlebaum, professor of health and sports science at the University of Dayton.

``I believe that a woman executive could be extremely successful without ever incorporating golf into her business activity. But now there is one more venue for me to meet customers. Now I know there is one more option in my bag,'' said Simpson, who works for Iamcard Inc., which markets plastic cards with bar codes.

Simpson has played golf three times since taking the clinic. And, she said, although her game wasn't that good, she could talk the talk.

Titlebaum's sessions are limited to women because, he said, women executives risk losing business or are discounted by male colleagues if they don't ``speak sports.''

``Men are going to continue to talk this language of sports, regardless,'' Titlebaum said. ``So women can either choose to play this or not.''

Tom Bass of San Diego, a former coach with the Cincinnati Bengals, San Diego Chargers and Tampa Bay Buccaneers, conducts football seminars around the country for women and men. Most of those who take his one-day course want to use what they learn at work, while others just want to better understand football.

He teaches the basics: field size, time clock, downs, uniforms, scoring and penalties. But the students also learn offensive and defensive formations, and run plays.

Bass began offering the seminars because there was no place else for people to turn. Action at a football game happens too quickly for most beginners - male or female - to grasp, and no one wants to explain the rules while a game is in progress.

``I thought there was a niche there,'' he said.

Bass said he finds the seminars work best when the genders are taught separately. And, he said, most of his clients are women.

The idea of women learning sports talk to use as a business tool gets a chilly reception from 9 to 5, National Association of Working Women.

``This is what we call making visible the old-boys network,'' said Executive Director Ellen Bravo.

``Many deals are made on the golf course,'' Bravo acknowledges. ``Should they be? Of course not.''

But since they are, Simpson reasons, there's no reason a woman shouldn't try to play the game.

``If we lived in an ideal world, we would all be judged strictly on our performance for our company,'' she said. ``But we don't live in that world yet.''

OFF THE SIDELINES

A glossary of some sports terms and their office usage:

FUMBLE: Dropping or losing control of the football.

``Burns really fumbled the ball in thinking that product would sell. I don't know if the company will be able to recover.''

HONORS: In golf, the right to tee off first by virtue of the low score - a good thing in golf - on the previous hole.

``Jones, you've got the honors in making your presentation to the board. We'll follow you.''

PUNT: To give up the football by kicking it to the other team. Usually follows failure to get a first down and retain possession of the ball.

``Let's punt the problem to marketing. There's nothing else we can do.''

ROUGH: In golf, the area off the fairway where the grass is allowed to grow higher. Hitting the ball from the rough is usually more difficult than a fairway shot.

``We've got to come up with a new angle because business is down. Profits are in the rough.''

TOUCHDOWN: To score by crossing the goal line with the football.

``We scored a touchdown with that new widget. Sales are through the roof!''

WHIFF: To swing and completely miss the golf ball or baseball.

``Looks like old Snodgrass really whiffed on his presentation to investors. They're talking to another agency now.''

CAPTION(S):

Photo, Box

Photo: (color) University of Dayton professor Peter Titlebaum teaches ``Golf Networking'' to businesswomen who want to learn to ``speak sports.''

Associated Press

Box: OFF THE SIDELINES (see text)